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Thread: time to give up on this one?

  1. #1
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    time to give up on this one?

    I've been talking to this girl daily for about 7 weeks via texting, and in that time we've hung out 3 times... I've known her for a while and we went out a few times a couple of years ago but it never went anywhere.

    Anyway, once again it doesn't seem like it's really going anywhere. I really like her, but she doesn't seem to be putting any effort into trying to get together again. She is really busy, which I understand, but I know she has free time where we could meet up for at least a few hours.

    Maybe she just wants me to put in all the work? But that is getting tiring, especially with how busy it is, and how busy I'm not, it would be so much easier for her to just pick a time to do something and ask me.

  2. #2
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    maybe she's just not interested in you like you thought she was, don't put effort into her if you feel its not worth it, give her space and don't talk to her 24/7
    let her come to you is all i can really say

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    She doesn't sound that interested. Before giving up you can try to be direct about asking her out and stop texting her that much.

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    i've definitely texted her a lot less lately and when i do i give short answers/comments... and dont make comments that require a reply... but she keeps saying things and asking me stuff, sometimes completely random after i dont text or respond to her for awhile.

    i'm thinking about the direct approach pretty soon. if she just wants to be friends, thats fine... i'd just rather know flat out that way i don't have to me in the dark about what she is thinking. i just have to do it in a way that doesnt scare her off if she is interested...

  5. #5
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    why do people think they are going to make a meaningful connection over some abbreviated 'text' sentences baffles me.

    first, CALL her.

    second, it is the holiday season and finals just ended. people are busy. but if she doesn't make time for you in the next couple of weeks then you can assume she isn't interested. if someone is interested, they WILL make time, or they will promise to make time after the holidays. you failed to click several years ago, and chances are there is still alack of ch emistry.

  6. #6
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    Find out when she's free, suggest something for you guys to do. Raise your own value by being busier or at least appearing to be busier, in the mean time. When you meet with her, flirt to the best of your ability and close with (at least) a kiss - you've been speaking to her for 7 weeks, it's not too soon.

    If things seem bad and you think it's pretty much time to give up, let her know you like her. If your instincts are right she won't feel the same, but you'll have removed any doubt and you can properly get over her. And hey, maybe she'll surprise you.

    Good luck mate.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by iamkayelem View Post
    I've been talking to this girl daily for about 7 weeks via texting, and in that time we've hung out 3 times... I've known her for a while and we went out a few times a couple of years ago but it never went anywhere.

    Anyway, once again it doesn't seem like it's really going anywhere. I really like her, but she doesn't seem to be putting any effort into trying to get together again. She is really busy, which I understand, but I know she has free time where we could meet up for at least a few hours.

    Maybe she just wants me to put in all the work? But that is getting tiring, especially with how busy it is, and how busy I'm not, it would be so much easier for her to just pick a time to do something and ask me.
    There is no other way to put this other than this:
    She's just not that into you.
    IF she were she'd already budget her free time to spend as much time as possible with you.
    This is simply not the case.
    If I were you I would cut bait and move on.
    A side effect of you taking initiative to squash these childish games of phone tag
    would be that she would take notice and begin to wonder why which may force her hand
    but then again it would convey her true intentions that she's just viewing you as an afterthought/appetizer
    and not the main course.

    I've been there and a women just KNOWS when she wants to be with someone.
    Most love the enigma and all of these reasons for her not hanging out are excuses
    designed to ease your feelings...nothing more.

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