gf advice

[mazdaspeed]

So I've known this person (lets call her Jane) for at least 3 years, and have dated for about 2 of those years. Things have been going very well minus one or two concerns, but otherwise it is what i suppose some might call a good relationship. The question i have is, is there a way to broach the subject of being conversational in a way that is constructive and doesn't necessarily include the "lets be friends" routine? Or is not being in a relationship with Jane pretty much my only option until this person figures their own stuff out?

i understand opinions are like ears, everyone has at least one, but i really have been struggling to deal with this, so input would be appreciated...

[Lipp]

Uhm...May want to reformulate your question, it doesn't make much sense.

[mazdaspeed]

hmmm....i guess how do i make it so that conversations flow easier between me and my girlfriend? Is there something I can do outside of leading the conversations? Its starting to get to be a fair bit of work, and i know not everything is my responsibility.

[SelflessnHumble]

So I've known this person (lets call her Jane) for at least 3 years, and have dated for about 2 of those years. Things have been going very well minus one or two concerns, but otherwise it is what i suppose some might call a good relationship. The question i have is, is there a way to broach the subject of being conversational in a way that is constructive and doesn't necessarily include the "lets be friends" routine? Or is not being in a relationship with Jane pretty much my only option until this person figures their own stuff out? hmmm....i guess how do i make it so that conversations flow easier between me and my girlfriend? Is there something I can do outside of leading the conversations? Its starting to get to be a fair bit of work, and i know not everything is my responsibility.

Can you stop being so cryptic for just a moment and tell us the whole story?
What are these concerns that you say are "minor" Yet you not only feel
that you are struggling with but also feel that it's starting to be a fair bit of
work to lead the conversation???

You say you have been in a relationship for 2 out of the 3 years you've known each other...
Then state she has stuff that needs figuring out??? What stuff?

You make it sound like she is dull, inexperienced and has no mind of her own.
You make it sound like she only responds to your queries and doesn't seem to think for herself.

You are both each responsible for your part in the relationship.
What you are responsible for is you and your actions.
So the best thing to do is to be honest with her.
Tell her how you feel and be prepared for any answer AND be patient and understanding
making certain you don't punish her for what she says; when you were the one who has the issue with her.

If you can't do this: You need to end this.
Why beat a dead horse and drag on something that has seemingly run its course?
Be kind and remain friends but only if you both can handle doing so after being a couple for 66.6% of the time.

[smackie9]

If you have trouble having those intimate convos, well you two were not meant for each other. You have to have a considerable amount of things in common to have good convos, which leads to being connected with each other. You guys just don't click.