Why did she change?

[Holdme]

I meet a girl who I like for who she is. We start dating, things go well, we become boyfriend and girlfriend. For some reason she changes herself to something she thinks I would like, then relises she isn't happy being that person, and I constantly think somethings wrong because she isn't being herself - in a non obsessive way, so she splits up with me and starts being herself again.

Now any dumb idiot would know that I liked her before she changed otherwise I wouldn't have dated her. So my question is, why did she change? And how can i stop this happening in the future?

[smackie9]

Communication bro. Some girls try real hard to impress so they change the way they act and look. I'm guessing you never gave her any real response so she felt she failed and gave up.

[small banana]

You cant stop someone from changing man. She obviously changed because she wanted to. If she changed solely because of you you must suck awful hard.

[HeartIsAching]

It's more likely that she was pretending to be something she wasn't to get your interest to begin with, then reverted once she thought she had you.

They also like to start trying to change you once you're together, because she didn't like you for who you were, but for what she thought she could make of you.

OR:

Men get married thinking she'll never change
Women get married, thinking of what she can change.

both are wrong.

[warriormaiden]

^I agree.

She probably was that way all along. The girl that you thought you liked, probably wasn't real.

[xxazurexx]

She sounds like a frigging weirdo to me.

[Dean Kaplan]

So my question is, why did she change?

Did you ask her? Not trying to be funny, but that seems like the easiest way to get this question answered, vs. asking people on a forum that don't know her. She could have a mental issue, for all we know really. Hope you get better my friend. Please don't mistake my comment as being mean.

[Holdme]

Thanks for all your comments, i assure you she wasn't fake at all when we first got together as she alot of things with her friends that matched with her personality - like going to music festivals (she did go because she rang me every day she was there)

Well, maybe i wasn't open enough with her, so she didnt know if I really liked her and started trying to fix our relationship by acting differently... I don't know. It was absolutely fine tilll we had to go back to college and the relationship went long distance... I think the relationship must have been stressing her out as we both do have ALOT of work to do as it's our final year, to be honest the relationship was stressing me out too when it was long distance, so i'm kinda glad we've broken up. She does say that its not my fault that we're breaking up and its the distance thats killed the spark.. Should i believe her when shes says that we might be able to get back together when we finish college? It's just i feel that we we're doing so great til we had to go back to college, and things went downhill from there.. my thinking is if we didnt have to go back to college, we would've been very happy and not broken up.

[Dean Kaplan]

Who knows what the future holds. I wouldn't hold my breath for you guys to get back together, though. Just move on, and maybe she'll fall back in your lap.