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Thread: Constant Put Downs and Treated Bad By my Family

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    Constant Put Downs and Treated Bad By my Family

    What do i do when no sees that i can do anything right and puts me down my oldest daughter is the worst i feel abused and yesterday my grandson who is 10 punched me ive been putting up with this from them all for 4 yrs my self esteem is nil i hate my life they blame me for things i did not do in the past all i want is some respect
    Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so much.
    Oscar Wilde

    What lies behind us, and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
    ~ by Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

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    If a 10 year old child is hitting you, the problem lies with the relationship between you and his mother (unless the child is mentally ill).

    Maybe you and your daughter should get some counseling? Your daughter is clearly extremely angry about something, and you denying any responsibility at all probably only adds fuel to the fire.
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

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    I relize she is angry but sometimes angry at everyone it sometimes is like eggs shells and she is toxic i feel sometimes like walking away from my family for the lack of respect i get but i am part owner in the house we live
    Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so much.
    Oscar Wilde

    What lies behind us, and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
    ~ by Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

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    I agree that the problem is with the mother. Usually grandparents are most respected, sometimes even more than the parents.

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    I agree with Vash - there is a problem between you and the child. If you lived in the UK, Parenting Classes would be recommended to you. They deal with the relationship between the child and parent, identify any problems, ways to overcome problems and the parent is learned how to discipline in a correct way.

    Surely you have these things in the US?

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    Quote Originally Posted by doppelgaenger View Post
    I agree that the problem is with the mother
    It's down to a lack of discipline I think.

    If they are not being disciplined in the correct way, they will continue on in their behaviour. More so with the kid who punched....he needs to be taught it is WRONG to punch.

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    Yeah. I think the kid needs a good spanking.

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    Quote Originally Posted by doppelgaenger View Post
    Yeah. I think the kid needs a good spanking.
    Is that allowed over there?

    Over here we can't spank anymore - it would be classed as abuse.

    Mind you when I was a kid and if I did anything wrong, I used to get a good slap, lol. Didn't do me any harm and I grew up respecting my mum and dad and other people.

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    In the USA, spanking is still allowed. In Germany it is also classed as abuse.

    When I was a kid, my grandpa used to threaten to rip my arm off and slap me with the bloody end. I love that man, dearly. I also got my fair share of spankings and was grounded quite frequently.

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    Quote Originally Posted by sweetkissesforu View Post
    I relize she is angry but sometimes angry at everyone it sometimes is like eggs shells and she is toxic i feel sometimes like walking away from my family for the lack of respect i get but i am part owner in the house we live
    These kids have no respect and i do sooooo much for them
    Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so much.
    Oscar Wilde

    What lies behind us, and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
    ~ by Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

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    Quote Originally Posted by xxazurexx View Post
    Is that allowed over there?

    Over here we can't spank anymore - it would be classed as abuse.

    Mind you when I was a kid and if I did anything wrong, I used to get a good slap, lol. Didn't do me any harm and I grew up respecting my mum and dad and other people.
    It's abuse here, too. As it should be. Hitting a child does not teach them anything but that it's ok to strike loved ones.

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    Quote Originally Posted by xxazurexx View Post
    I used to get a good slap, lol. Didn't do me any harm and I grew up respecting my mum and dad and other people.
    There's a difference between respecting and fearing.

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    Quote Originally Posted by doppelmakemelol View Post
    There's a difference between respecting and fearing.
    I respect them...I don't fear them.

    I got a slap across the backside, they didn't beat the shit out of me.

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    Quote Originally Posted by HeartIsAching View Post
    It's abuse here, too. As it should be. Hitting a child does not teach them anything but that it's ok to strike loved ones.
    I agree. There is a way and a means to discipline a child and without resorting to the physical.

    I went through a period where my daughter was bunking off school and unawares to me. Anyway and when I was finally informed, my punishment was to take away her mobile phone for a few days and no pocket money for 2 weeks. It worked.

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    Quote Originally Posted by sweetkissesforu View Post
    What do i do
    Stand up for yourself. Demand respect. Tell them to leave you alone, if they don't, start spending more time away from them. Tell your grandson's parents that they better discipline him for hitting you or else no more free babysitting. Get tough.

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