when you are in love

[Emerald_Dreams]

There is no such thing as "true love" and there is no such thing as "unconditional love". But there's no point in trying to convince here because she's a woman living in her FantasyLand(TM).

Judge him by his actions, not the way he looks at you. Some dudes, especially the slick ones (like how I was in college), could totally convince any girl that she's THE ONE.
That was how I took all those v-cards in college....too many to remember. Those girls were usually very insecure and inexperience, so I was able to manipulate their feelings.
Once I slept with them, I would lose interest and move on. Yes I was a jerk back then, and I have changed completely. Would never want to deceive another girl again.

Oh man, college. Those were the days...

[Take2]

There is no such thing as "true love" and there is no such thing as "unconditional love". But there's no point in trying to convince here because she's a woman living in her FantasyLand(TM).

Can you clarify? Are you really saying there is no such thing as romantic love? Because to me, true love just means genuine romantic love. You are engaged, aren't you in love?

[Emerald_Dreams]

Are you really saying there is no such thing as romantic love?

No, I'm saying there's no such thing as "true love" or "unconditional love" or any of this other rubbish Disney Land has filled young women's minds with.

I'm engaged, yes, and I love her very much and care about her. That doesn't mean there aren't conditions in which I could fall out of love with her. That doesn't mean we won't break up one day and I'll fall in love with someone else. All these ideas "the love of my life", "my one true love", my "soulmate" - you usually only find young ladies who still live in FantasyLand(TM) talking about that sort of thing.

[Take2]

OK, that I agree with. The idea of "soul mates" or "one true love" are fairy tales. Now, I do believe that with work and honesty and communication I may be able to have true and meaningful love that could last the rest of my life. But yeah, if this love falls apart, I could still find that with someone new.

[Emerald_Dreams]

Yes. When we stop living in FantasyLand(TM) we can finally start to have meaningful, mature, adult relationships with the opposite sex.

[red_sparrow]

Unconditional love can be DANGEROUS.

[curly1118]

True sincerity is not seen through someone's eyes... if some random pulled you over and offered to drive you home, would you get in the car with him because his "eyes look sincere"?

No, you wouldn't.

[SelflessnHumble]

Unconditional love can be DANGEROUS.

Any love that isn't true is dangerous.
Any love that is derived from a person who is unstable, mentally, verbally and who manifests this instability physically is dangerous.
To me: unconditional love isn't the problem, it's the person who claims they're in control of their emotions when in fact they're not.

If I'm capable of murder, and I *feel* I'm in an unconditional loving relationship (but I lied to my spouse/partner about my previous 2 strikes of involuntary manslaughter)
and I kill her and her son: did I unconditionally love her? (Nope) not to me. Now read the sentence again omitting the word "unconditional" -it's the same thing.

[SelflessnHumble]

True sincerity is not seen through someone's eyes... if some random pulled you over and offered to drive you home, would you get in the car with him because his "eyes look sincere"?

No, you wouldn't.

Sad thing is: some people would!
They watch TV and a romantic movie and record in their mind the part that says, "There was just something about his eyes...they were so inviting, open and so sincere."