How to show a guy you are NOT interested!

[ilove]

sorry about the length!!!

So, I'm trying to figure out a way to hint to a guy that i am NOT interested. (a little more difficult when you can't use body language, it's long distance)*

He is into me (I know this) although he has not confessed it to me directly. We are both 17, but he is in college (smart). Also super shy, so not the type that finds it easy to ask out a girl. During Xmas, he was flirting with me and I flirted back a bit because I wasn't sure. But as soon as he left I realized I didn't think of him in that way. A girl is allowed to change her mind!*

Now he texts and messages me non-stop about random things, and honestly it's getting annoying, not to mention awkward becuase often I don't know what to say. I have tried telling him I'm really busy or that Im distracted and can't talk. I haven't initiated any texts or convos and I've tried to distant myself but he isn't getting the hint. I haven't shown interest since Xmas, and don't want to lead him on. *

If you want to give me some advice about how to show a guy you ARE interested as well, I won't argue

[ames]

hahha i am having the SAME PROBLEM!!!! He messages me every single freakin day...even if i dont reply he will keep messaging me...grrr...

Do what im doing (although its not really working for me!) stop replying to his messages..and if u do, just message something really straight to the point. Your going to have to tell him that you aren't interested..although, i have done that and he STILL texts me..its so annoying

[ilove]

I can't believe he doesn't get it! I mean it's pretty obvious I barely ever reply to texts.. And he called me out on it once so I just said my phone was dead. I am really afraid to come out and say I'm not interested because it would embarass him so much and I'm not really supposed to know he likes me, although he isn't that subtle. I just get this sick feeling that he is holding onto something that is never gunna happen. I sound really heartless

[MerryH]

I don't think there's a great answer for this. Whatever you do, it's going to suck for him.

You could just never text him back. Ever. He'll get the hint sooner or later. You don't really owe him any explanations.

Or you could send him a message that says something like, "During Xmas, I thought we really hit it off, but I'm not really feeling it anymore. It was nice talking to you, but I don't think we should be friends. Sorry." Then never reply to any messages again. This way is certainly more humane, but again, you don't really owe him anything.

Edit:

I sound really heartless

No, you really don't. You don't have to like everyone just because they like you. The fact that you're worried about his feelings is not heartless at all.

[Boisdevie]

If it's long distance then
Ignore his texts
Cut all contact
Easy.
Or alternatively send him a text which reads '**** off and leave me alone'

[ftm]

Girls are so ridiculous sometimes.

Let me explain things for you. This is how to communicate with a man: Use your words.

If you want to send the "message" that are not interested, say, "I'm not interested in you."

If you want to send the message that you are interested, say, "I'm interested in you."

Of course, you can embellish all you want, but you have to communicate verbally. Guys don't do signals well. Especially when they are 17!!!!

[MerryH]

It would be pretty weird for her to bust out with "I'm not interested in you" out of the blue, when he's never made a move or given a clear, verbal indication that he's interested in her. And it's not her job to teach him how to interpret signals.

[ftm]

No, but it is her job, as a human being, to communicate with people. She shouldn't be frustrated with him that he's not getting the message when she's not communicating it effectively. She could say, "Look, I get the feeling that you might have an interest in me that goes beyond friendship, and I just wanted to let you know that I don't feel the same way." I had girls say similar things to me when I was in high school, and it did me a world of good. Probably the girls, too, since they got me off of their trail. Times when a girl was waiting for me to get a signal were agonizing for me, and probably not much fun for the girl involved either.

[HeartIsAching]

It would be pretty weird for her to bust out with "I'm not interested in you" out of the blue, when he's never made a move or given a clear, verbal indication that he's interested in her. And it's not her job to teach him how to interpret signals.

Passive aggressive bullshit. Say what you mean.

[f1repyro]

He's being persistent because his ego. He keep try to win ur heart because his ego to get u.
If u want to make him one of ur fans then keep reply to him once in a while, but I don't recommend this because it make u the type of a women that I hate.
But I know it will make u happy 'coz u got fan.

So u should text him like this :
I'm sorry but I don't think of u that way. I'm not interested in u.
From now on, I won't reply ur text for u to give up on me.

There. Nice and clear.

Then, don't ever reply his text even if u get harsh words from the text that he send to u.


Regards,

[xxazurexx]

Because he's just some guy bugging you with random crap (that you have no interest in or feelings for), it should be easy for you to just ignore him.

So long as you reply, he will take it as a sign of interest and he will continue texting.

If you ignore and continue to ignore he will soon get the message.

[vashti]

If you are too wimpy to tell him you aren't interested, just tell him you started dating someone else.

[Gratedwasabi]

Tell me you're not interesting.

Ignoring him is beyond rude. I'm disgusted that people are suggesting that. You're too good to tell some guy that, as far as you've led us to believe, is being nice but obviously got the wrong message? Come on. "I'm sorry if I gave you the wrong impression, I can't really keep texting with you. Bye."

[ptaylor]

The best thing I would say is just be honest. Men are diffeerent to women and we need straight facts. Do it in the nicest way possible. Maybe text him that you thought you liked him at xmas time and did flirt with him but you realised that you don't like him like that. If he is shy and you ignore him or are down right rude then you could make him worse, he sounds like a sensitive guy. just be honest in the nicest possible way. Hope this helps?

[xxazurexx]

Come on. "I'm sorry if I gave you the wrong impression, I can't really keep texting with you. Bye."

So he can then try to 'convince' her to give him a chance?

Been there done that.

No communication IS communication.....it says NOT INTERESTED.