Hi what would you do!!!

[kimberly1961]

Hi,
Im new to this site but just need some advice as to what you would do!!

I split with my ex a year ago due to violence,paranoia, and trust issues on his part but we still kept in contact by phone and email but after christmas talking to him was getting me down because he said he had changed but i couldnt believe him after everything i had been through with him and decided to cut all contact with him. After a week i was starting to feel slightly better but still thought about him alot. Well since he cant get in contact with me he started to text my mum and asked her if he could speak to her. She didnt really want to talk to him after what he had put me through she also doesnt like him for it but when she told me and i told her if he calls her just to answer and see what he has to say.

So anyway she ended up talking to him on the phone and he was telling her how he has changed and really wants us to try again and make me and my boys happy and she said that he really sounded genuine and that you wouldnt have thought it was the same guy on the phone he was really nice. He asked her to get me to call him just for a chat so i did but when i called him he started going on about how we should meet up for a drink and talk because things are different now but i told him i didnt believe him but then he said that my mum told him we should meet and talk and i knew that was a lie because she wouldnt say that. She has been encouraging me to get over him. So when i said i didnt believe she would say that he said did your mum tell you what was said! do you want me to play you the convo? I couldnt believe that he has recorded the conversation he had with my mum!! WHY??? hes recorded my convo in the past to and i think its really rude and desrespectfull!! I dont know what to do about him now hes done that but my mum said she aint going to talk to him anymore after this what would you do???

[GK001]

you must be nuts to wanting to get back with a psycho. violence? how can you let him in your life again when you have kids. when a guy wants to get you back he will sound genuine, his prob very genuine at the time. but he will change into his old self when things settle down.
i've done some research into those man with violent tendencies, they would beg, cry, even craw in-front of you to get you back. they would be the perfect man for few month/year then they'll go back to their old behavior.
To change ones character flaws it would take a life changing experience or long term councilling (even that wont guaranty it). It also depends on ones age too...the older the man the harder it is to change their mentalities. just like criminals you can at least rehabilitate the young ones.

I would tell you to call the police. tell them this guy is stalking you. you'll need to wipe this man out of your life for you to move on or else there is always the temptation and heartache. life is too short for regrets and 2nd chances. always move forward focus on a better future, don't dwell on the pass especially if its bad.

[xxazurexx]

He tells you he's a changed man and he's recording conversations with your mum?

He definitely has a screw loose!

I wouldn't trust that this guy has changed.

[BeneathTheSun]

Don't go back. You left him for a reason. People do not change. If you let him come back he might appear diffrent at first but he will revert to the way he was sooner or later. And why do you care what your mum thinks? Aren't you an adult capable of your own decisions? Move on to something better. Life is too short to waste on idiots.