Meant to be?

[phil1wright]

Extract of the situation i posted in broken hearts
Basically my girlfriend, atm ex is who i believe i am meant to spend my life with
3 years ago we went out for 3 weeks b4 splitting, then, end of 2009 i thought id get bk in touch after i found old msgs from her
we met up after a while, went out for drinks, and then kissed as the date ended.
Start of 2010, as soon as we could we went out again and started going out properly
We were together til the summer, when her personal life fell apart, she went off the rails and i was a casualty
It took a couple of weeks of arguing fallouts drinking and stuff but then we ended up back together.

I believed then, as i do now, that we are made for each other and will end up together whatever happens.

Whats the general opinion on this kind of thing?

[Take2]

There is no single person on the planet you are "meant to be" with.

You ARE meant to be happy.

Based on your intelligence, outgoingness, socioeconomic lifestyle, energy level, religion, etc., there are a certain number of people in your general area of the world who you could successfully make a life with. That number is not fair, there may be 4 people that you could be happy with and 3,000 that your college roommate could be happy with. If you meet one of those people and you both work hard for the rest of your lives, you can be lifelong romantic partners with ups and downs, but an overall trend of happiness. That is reality.

Believing in a fated soulmate is laziness. Sure, it takes the pressure off of you to make your own happiness in life...but it also takes away some of your control over you own destiny. It leaves people to, as you are, pine for a relationship that is dead and that wasn't even that spectaular when it was alive. Move on, dude. Take charge of your own happiness and let go of the fairy tale.