Having trouble getting over my ex GF

[>brando.]

She broke up with me just over 3 months ago, we have been in contact maybe 3 times in total, last time was over a month ago and what was said was that we shouldn't talk, so i asked if she really wanted that and she said for now because she moved on and she knows some how that i havent at that time, i dont know how because i never said i missed her or wanted her back, just a few calls was it, woman intuition hey , lol

Anyways, i still think about her Allll the time and would love to start something again, however, i do not know where she is at and do not know how to find out or even know how i sould bring suck a thing up, i feel that i should at least try to get her back u know, 3 months and i still feel for her , on another note i also want to get over her because she hurt me, it is difficult tho to find myself interested in other womne, of course i look and talk to girls and i find women attractive ane everything bu i can not find the desire to like someone else. , when i do kind of like someone i think of my ex.

i dont know what to do . it is getting better but i dont know if i should try to get her back because i do love her or if i should let time get over her .

and yah i now all the things i need to do, go to the gym, read books, speand time with friends and family, work on myself in every way, which i have done and have improved in many areas, .


i am not too sure where i am really going here , i am kind of all over the place, all i know is i think about her all the time and i need some womens advice

Thanks

Brandon, Calgary Ab, 24 years old

[Cinnabella]

She hurts you? How? Did you hurt her as well?

If you think she is worth it, and was very special, why not? But it doesn't sound like she wants to be back together though :-).

[>brando.]

yah, she has not even contacted me one time in 3 months and she moved on pretty fast, bu i dont think that means i cant try , who knows maybe i could spark some interest again.. any ideas,

and no i didnt hurt her, we just fought a lot more than normal and she felt a relationship should be easy and shouldnt have to"work on things after oonly 4 months together its comfusing cus i know she loved me a lot and just days before the breakup she said it to my face how much she loved me. i dont really want to be with another girl so i have to at least try before i can fully move on, so far the no contact has not made her want to talk to me , i assume she would if she was still single and my gut tells me she isn't, should i just let her go ..?

[ktm390]

man i know EXACTLY how you feel. she has made it pretty clear that she is over you and it is really hard for you to let go because you still love her. i dont think you will ever get back together with her so i say **** the no contact rule at this point. maybe trying to get her back will make you feel better even though she probably wont go for it. but it could make you feel better in that you will know that you tried everything to make it work. and eventually you will be able to want other women. you just have to be in the right place in your own head first to start getting over her.

[Cinnabella]

I feel very confused about your case, were you guys very stress with fighting? How long did it going before she broke it off? But I think, if she ttuthly loved you, she wouldn't give up so easily after some fights if they weren't serious! And you better try your best so you won't regret later, 3 months are enough for NC, ask her if she wants to try again! And you have your answer!

[>brando.]

well, we had been fighting for 3 months, it was off and on though, everything else was fantastic, the relationship with the family, our love life , our chemistry was amazing, we could never be without eachother, and she said she didnt want to be in a relationship where this early on you have to work on things, the fighting was more than normal and fairly stressful and even emotional . i understand why she left me, it is not because she didnt love me but because she was not happy any more and maybe some of her feelings went away because of to much arguing ,

i can't just sk her if she will take me back, we never speak and i am pretty sure she is seeing someone. i cant just throw that on here you know, i want to figure out how to try and get her back smoothly, .. first by slowly talking again, then maybe an outing like coffee and then some dates, talking about getting her back and discussing things about before will only make her not want me in here life like she already feels. i want her to want to be a part of my life again .

[burtontj88]

You just gotta drop everything and move on man. I know it's such a cliche answer but time will erase the feelings you have. It's normal to have to go through any pain or thoughts to want to be with her, think about what she could be doing at point and time. If she's moved on and you still have feelings you need to avoid her, no facebook, try not to be in the same vicinity if you know she's going to be around.

Take the time to capitalize on other things in life now that you have time. Try not to be bored.

[courtney90]

Move on...she has! Sorry to sound so blunt..but you seem like a nice guy and deserve someone who wants to be with you! You said she hurt you...so why would you want to be with her? yea i get it ...you love her! But im telling you there are so many other great women out there! I know it's a lot easier from someone on the outside looking in to tell you to move on but believe me when you are over her you will see what everyone else it telling you. So maybe you say everytime you meet a new girl all you think about is you ex...is this because you don't think you can do any better? because believe me there is something better out there for you! Just go out and have fun and meet new people...so what if you don't like the first girl you meet ... but that can still help you to get over you ex. It's going to take some time....we have all been through rough times with breakkups...and yes they all suck but it will all get better in time! Just keep your head held high and don't even talk to her...show her that you don't need her and that you can be happy just being you! Good luck

[Cinnabella]

I know everyone is advising you to move on, but for me, I'm going to tell you to fight for it till you think you can't do anything for it more, then you won't regret later. If she still loved you, give her space and make her miss you :-).

[ashley89]

I'm single and my boyfriend dumped me a month ago! he was an ass! let's date hahah

[xxazurexx]

I'm all for giving things one last shot also.

For all you know she could be missing you and her pride is why she doesn't make contact. I've been in that situation before and I sat back. As much as I wanted to contact, yup, pride got in the way. If he was waiting for me contacting him, he'd have been waiting forever....your girl may be the same.

A benefit of giiving things 'one last shot' also, can help us to finally move on and accept it's over and if the ex still doesn't want to reconcile.

So yeah, if you feel have to, go ahead and try.

[doppelgaenger]

The reason why you're having an especially hard time getting over her is that you've got no closure about the breakup. You have desires about reconciliation and everything. Maybe it's in your best interest to give her another chance, otherwise you'll need to force yourself to realize that you're better off without her.

[>brando.]

Thanks everyone, i have been seeing someone and its fun, but fun is all i really feel. i do like this new girl but she is not everything i am looking for, i think she knows i am rebounding on her but she really likes me, is it wrong to continue seeing her.. as for my ex .... my thoughts of her are less but i do still basicly day dream of reconciling with her. There was something so special and even tho she hurt me i love her so for this reason i have to forget her, no matter how bad i dont want to i have to.. i have tried speaking to her and she cares none.. no responces or concerns about how i am doing at all .

[LostOne]

ay bro i feel you. and i say try to get your ex back.. maybe write her a letter or something let her know how you feel. a mistake i made was over the time my girl broke up with me but and i was still in love with her, i had "fun" and slept with another girl thinking i would be in a way getting over her. it didn't help, and just hurt me in the long run when i tried to get her back and had the chance.