Friendship first ?

[shyguy0806]

So if a guy wants to confess to a girl, should a relationship start with friendship first or can it jump straight into bf gf kinda thing??

[GK001]

after the confession its either...NO or YES. no friendship after that.

[shyguy0806]

How about even before confession?

[GK001]

talk, be a friend first. hang out but give her hints you want to be more. if shes interested she would show it...then you go for the confession.

[vertical_sky]

I don't suggest being her friend first. That's how guys end up in the friendship zone, which you CAN escape but is very difficult. Being her friend but giving her hints doesn't usually work either, because as a girl, she might assume you're just naturally flirty, or she might actually get that you like her but then wonder why you never ask her out. Eventually, she'll get sick of beating around the bush, and go out with a guy who makes it obvious that he likes her.

But you also don't want to jump straight into a relationship without getting to know her and seeing if you guys are compatible. My suggestion is to ask her to something casual, like coffee/tea/lunch. Tell her," I think you're pretty/smart/kind hearted. I'd really like to get to know you better." Then see how coffee/lunch goes. If she seems flirty and open, up the ante a little bit... ask her to something fun like ice skating or hiking, something a little bit more physical. Keep increasing the "intensity" of the one-on-one interactions. This way you're giving yourself/her an opportunity to see how you guys would be in a relationship without giving her the impression you see her as a friend.

[the_robot]

I suggest at least getting to know her a little before.. you sound like you are going to tell someone you haven't even talked to that you love her. That's got to creep her out for sure.

[smackie9]

I suggest at least getting to know her a little before.. you sound like you are going to tell someone you haven't even talked to that you love her. That's got to creep her out for sure.

I agree with this. You find someone attractive you ask them out. A relationship has to go through stages before you say "I love you". The friend thing is wrong. If you are friends first you get stuck in the friends zone and 99% of the time there is no way out of that because you become their friend for a reason....you are not BF material, they are just using you for the attention you give them.

[GK001]

there are plenty of relationships starting out like a friendship for a month or so then you move on to dating and so on. Not all girls would go on a date with a guy right off the bat before knowing them a little. unless your good looking and her type.
you let them feel you like them first then built on that, stealing their heart by been "smooth and charming" make them think you two share the same interest(even if its not), find out what she likes so you can make her think you two have a connection, that's how ugly guys usually do it.
stealing their heart is very important if you want the girl to be your gf. but if you want a lasting and fruitful relationship then you'll need to be your self (that however might not always land you the girl you WANT).

The thing is dont be too nice of a guy right off the bat. if your too nice they will take you for granted. be the nice guy after you've got her heart. she would appreciate what you do 100x more cos shes in love. once a girl is in love its GG.

[shyguy0806]

there are plenty of relationships starting out like a friendship for a month or so then you move on to dating and so on. Not all girls would go on a date with a guy right off the bat before knowing them a little. unless your good looking and her type.
you let them feel you like them first then built on that, stealing their heart by been "smooth and charming" make them think you two share the same interest(even if its not), find out what she likes so you can make her think you two have a connection, that's how ugly guys usually do it.
stealing their heart is very important if you want the girl to be your gf. but if you want a lasting and fruitful relationship then you'll need to be your self (that however might not always land you the girl you WANT).

The thing is dont be too nice of a guy right off the bat. if your too nice they will take you for granted. be the nice guy after you've got her heart. she would appreciate what you do 100x more cos shes in love. once a girl is in love its GG.

why is it so difficult to get a girl? sigh....

[xxazurexx]

I'd say if you liked her, ask her out.

It will save you from having to pretend to be her friend and in order to try and get in her pants....a mistake most men make. Then they think they became friendzoned for good and don't get the girl because they are 'too nice'...awww boo hoo.

[GK001]

I'd say if you liked her, ask her out.

You would have to time it right too. Dont ask a girl out when shes just broken up, not looking for a relationship, emotional baggage issues, family issues...etc... So it helps with a bit of research before going in.

[shyguy0806]

You would have to time it right too. Dont ask a girl out when shes just broken up, not looking for a relationship, emotional baggage issues, family issues...etc... So it helps with a bit of research before going in.

A bit of research... Do you mean stalk her?

Dude, I don't even know her name.....T . T

[sadie_genie]

A bit of research... Do you mean stalk her?

Dude, I don't even know her name.....T . T

LMAO. No, he means TALK to her to find out.

[ADProgrammer]

So if a guy wants to confess to a girl, should a relationship start with friendship first or can it jump straight into bf gf kinda thing??

Well in my point of view, it should be FRIENDSHIP first. That's because a deep friendship can make you two understand each other far more better than discovering OH.! She has these types of habits tooo... OR OH.! I never thought of that.

Yes that's true. I suggest that every true relationship should start only after deep friendship that because a friendship is just like a relationship with just a distance between the partners physically. I hope you understand what I am trying to convey.

Thanks.

[thisisnewtome]

i think the same as the last guy being friends first builds a much stronger connection because you can talk about stuff not as easy to bring up under the pressure of a relationship. You get to know her on that lvl and then decide if you want things to go farther she may have alot of family issues or something you don't want to get involved with.