Let's play Family Feud, XXX edition:
Why do guys watch porn?
#1 Answer: because she isn't around when we want some release and visually stimuli is superior than masturbating based on our minds doing it for us.
(This includes watching sexy woman getting pounded in sexy positions, her moaning, facial expressions and overall dirty nature is a huge turn on)
Now, if he is watching it while you were sleeping: he may have a sexual addiction OR he may not get as turned on from you: as he does from porn (possible)
Now, the fact he gets mad when you bring it up is a tell (to me) because he knows that when he gets angry: your cue is to STFU about it (and I bet you do)
However: since you have a legitimate right to tell him your concerns: How you say it is more important than what you say..
So...You need to be sweet, calm and open about it...And tell him:
"babe, I know you like watching porn, I don't mind it so much...but when you watch it while I am here with you: it sends me a message that I'm not
sexy enough for you to want to do anything sexual with me...because you have those porn movies to look at instead of me..."
If you say it like that: and he still gets bent out of shape: HE is the one who has issues, not you.
If and when he acts this out like a little baby: you need to know right then and there that he isn't validating your feelings, he's shitting on them instead.
If you put this situation out on facebook, how would all of your friends react? (EXACTLY!)
They wouldn't tolerate that: and they would be right: so stop thinking that he is the last guy on Earth...
Truth: I've watched pron, but I did it when she wasn't home; and she knows I like pron (one of thee first things I told her about myself)
What I don't do: is choose it over her! That does not make any sense at all to me.
You may never get him to validate your feelings and he may never explain to you why he does it (even while you're there)
Don't waste your time with this jerkoff (no pun intended) There are plenty of guys out there who would choose the real thing over a virtual F uck.
I really don't understand how this is a problem. It would be a problem if he was taking time away from you, his work, or other obligations to go seek out/watch porn. If he watching it when he is alone what is the big deal? It's perfectly normal for a guy to watch it but I agree with some others as well... please don't generalize as some guys don't watch any, some watch a little, and some watch a lot. In any case it should really only be a problem if you feel like he is watching it istead of doing other things that are more important.
no. can't do that.
Its only a issue if he chooses porn over you. I really dont see the problem.
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
Sure, you ready to bend over at any moment, whenever he feels like it? However he likes it, regardless of whether you're enjoying yourself or not?
Porn & Masturbation have one major advantage over actually getting laid. It's 100% self gratification. We don't have to give a crap about you or ever what we're doing when jacking off. I know myself, when I'm horny, I really, and honestly, don't give a crap about anyone else. I want to get off, and that's all I give a crap about.
From what I've heard or talked about, women often take something to get going, or keep going. We go off whenever, wherever. You try dealing with the desire to orgasm (we require it to breed even), when it can literally come on at any time, and doesn't just go away because you want it to.
You wake up with a boner, you cook with a boner, you take a left turn with a boner, you stub your toe and get a boner.
Might seem funny to you, but that's what having a penis is like. Even if we don't think about it, it does.
Green!
Every normal guy on this earth watches porn. In fact, if a guy didn't watch porn i would be shocked. Its partly due to accessibility, i mean its always there when you need it. There's nothing more to it really, as oppose to having sex the guy has to work before he gets the goods to put it bluntly. There's actually been studied which showed that guys are watching porn more and more. Theres a few reasons why. One, its convinient. We dont have to get ready or shave and shower before watching porn. Just pull it out and go to town. Two, it accommodates most guys fantasies. So basically threes nothing you can do about him watching porn. The only advice i would give would be to keep him interested sexually. I have a pretty active sex life with my gf, we know what turn us on which is key to a good sex life. talk to him see what turns him on. If that doesnt work just try rapping him as soon as he walks through the door, a little spontaneity might just kick his out of him porn habit. That last bit was a joke... might work though?
Well, debateably, we don't -need- it.
I did my business with our homemade stuff for years.
Got bored of it eventually though, so it's back to the net porn.
Green!
men and women are so different.
heartisaching-
thanks for your honesty. I do appreciate it. I know I have some issues to work out and I'm obviously struggling with them. I love this guy and i dont want to **** it up anymore then I already have so I will take your advice to heart...thanks.
selflessnhumble - I really just want to have an open conversation with him about it. I'm really trying to understand it and be okay with it and I want to just alk about it openly, I think that would help. but I'm not sure how to do that without offending him I guess. :-\ thank you for your post!
thank you so much to everyone for your advice and opinions. its really helpful to hear it all and I truly appreciate it!!