does she or doesn't she....

[neverknow]

Ok, let me start off with I am 24 and have never had a gf. I've always been shy, and being overweight most my life hasn't helped any. I lost a lot of weight, still got a bit to go, but I have gained a sliver of confidence lol bust still, despite help from a couple good friends, I still have trouble believing a girl would be interested in me. Anyways, now that that's out of the way, there is a certain female co-worker at work I've had a pretty big crush on for awhile. When she first started, our two different positions pretty much kept us from ever really being able to talk, despite working within close vicinity. She later got promoted to a position that I worked with, and I slowly started to talk to her here and there, which I was pretty proud of myself haha because normally I can never talk to girls I like. So that was about mid-December, and about mid-January I got promoted myself, still in the same dept but not really working with her anymore, I would just kind of walk through her area sometimes going from point A to point B. When I told her it was my last day at my old position, she actually looked kind of sad and said she'd miss me, which totally surprised me and made me very happy. So now with my new job, I talk to old "friends" that I used to always talk to, and I talk to her as much as I can, without distracting her from her work. So I usually talk to her maybe twice a week or so, and there are times when I'm walking by and she will wave or smile. Every time I get close to her or know I'm about to talk to her, my heart is pounding out of my chest.

So, I know a lot of you are probably like "get her facebook or number" or something, and I actually did try to look her up on facebook, and could only find her on some weird genealogy site, which brought me to my first concern, it said she was 30. I'm worried she would not be interested in dating someone 6 years younger than her. Also, she confused the hell outta me. One day I think she may actually like me, which is hard for me to do with my self-image problems, I usually just dismiss it as friendly coworker stuff, but sometimes I think it may actually be possible. Then the next day I'll go by and see her, and she's busy and doesn't really even look at me when she's talking, or will have her back to me. The other day I stopped to talk, and when I was passing by her, it was a tight space so she kinda put her hand on my arm as I passed, but then she kinda patted it and veeerry slightly squeezed it, but I definitely felt it. And today was probably the best day I've had in a long time. I timed it to be at her area as she was coming back from break, so I was talking to the guy breaking her, and as she came by she kinda brushed up against me, which that itself made my insides explode. So as she passed, I jokingly said "excuse you" and she said "oh I'm sorry did I bump into you" and she kinda grabbed me like in a half hug type thing and pushed me a little bit. needless to say I don't remember much of the rest of the workday haha.

So, sorry its long and may be hard to follow, I just kinda typed what came to mind. I just want to know, does all the touching lately mean she may like me? I know it means she doesn't hate me haha and is getting more comfortable around me, but I'm really afraid of pushing the coworker boundary and getting in trouble because she didn't mean it like that. I know I don't spend her whole shift with her (would be great though ) but I've never really seen her be touchy-feely with everyone, she seems like more of a quiet person, which may be why I like her.

[MerryH]

This is cute. You're cute. For some reason, this was a lot more charming than most of the "does she like me" threads.

So, yeah, she might like you. She seems a little flirty. The only way you'll know for sure is if you ask her out on a date. Just see if she wants to go have some coffee or drinks after work. Or you could go as far as arranging an outing with all your coworkers after work. Invite everyone to happy hour, or something. Then chat her up, lightly flirt, get her contact info and ask her out sometime soon after that. Just go for it.

[neverknow]

Haha, my friend says the same thing when I talk about her. I have a question though...she seems to like it when I wear a red shirt. I've had other friends at work say red looks good on me, but the first time I wore a red shirt, she said it makes me stand out. Then I didn't see her for a couple days, and even after that time, first thing as I walked in, she was like where's your red shirt it made you stand out. After that I had to go buy another red shirt lmao and when she saw me in it she said hey you wore red again, it makes you stand out. Is there anything I can read into her saying this all the time, or is it just I don't look as bad in red lol.

[Dealwithit]

My honest opinion is that... she doesnt LIKE like you, she just likes you and is a nice outgoing/social person when in the mood (such as not on the phone or stressed; turning her back at you).

The most cliche and obvious answer would be me telling you to ask her out someplace and see how she responds, but obviously you wont be doing that, you want to know beforehand what her response is most likely to be; you wouldnt like her to say no, plus you have confidence issues obviously.

Tell me how she waves at you?

[neverknow]

Umm, I dunno its hard to explain. Usually its not just like putting a hand up like most people do, she kinda waves from her elbow lol if that makes sense. I remember one time she didn't see me coming and when she did she waved pretty excitedly. She doesn't seem to be very buddy-buddy with many people though, which kinda makes me wonder sometimes

[Dealwithit]

Umm, I dunno its hard to explain. Usually its not just like putting a hand up like most people do, she kinda waves from her elbow lol if that makes sense. I remember one time she didn't see me coming and when she did she waved pretty excitedly. She doesn't seem to be very buddy-buddy with many people though, which kinda makes me wonder sometimes

I still feel it is just the stressful work enviroment that is sensitizing her and accenting her reactions to you. An elbow wave doesnt look suitable for someone you have a crush on, a more wrist-wave would be suitable in such case

[neverknow]

Does a limp wrist count? Haha I don't know, I go back and forth on it all the time, I'm hoping to maybe get a way to talk out side of work, providing I don't chicken out yet again lol

[justcheckin]

Id say what do you have to loose?

[Sarcasticshoe]

It sounds like it could be a case of the "just friends at the office bug"... But like others said, you seem genuinely endearing. Remember age doesn't matter, its all about how you get along, etc. and in regards to her possibly liking you... you'll never know until you ask her out or ask her if she has any feelings for you =) Good Luck sweetie!!!

[neverknow]

Ok I know its going to sound like I'm trying to make it sound like I want it to sound, and who knows maybe I am, but I think it is a wrist wave lmao. I dunno how to explain it, and screw it, I gotta just man up I guess. I know she at least is comfortable with me, and likes me in that sense at least. I know what I got to do, I just have a problem with executing it, I always get choked up and my mind goes blank, so I just kinda stand there and she works, and looks at me expectantly here and there and I usually got nothing and eventually say bye, no wonder I've been so mad at myself lately

[neverknow]

Well an update I guess. I was talking to her the other day, had intentions on talking about talking outside of work, and she dropped a bomb on me, saying she was thinking about switching to another shift so she would be able to get more sleep. Problem for me is that the shift starts and ends when I'm not there, so I'd never see her. I joked with her saying who will I bug when I'm bored if she leaves, and she just kinda said uhh you can talk to him or him or this Guy or this Guy. She either didn't get the hint or did and ignored it. I dunno what to do, but I've had a rough week, beating myself up cuz I want more and don't know what to do about it and am unsure of her feelings towards me lately. Anyways this was just a rant, I already expect your answers to be give her my number or something

[neverknow]

guess this is turning into more of a blog lol but I thought I'd add to it again. Today was her last day at work she decided she couldn't afford to keep commuting that far with gas prices the way they are. Unfortunately I didn't work today, so I saw her at work yesterday. For weeks I had been trying to get myself to give her my number/email, especially once she said she was leaving. So finally basically out of desperation yesterday as I was telling her bye I said keep in touch and gave it to her. She actually gave me a hug and said bye, but it sucked because someone came up so she had to get back to work, so it was rushed. Plus I was shaking like crazy from nerves haha so I'm sure she felt it, and I wasn't expecting the hug so I was even more nervous from being caught off guard and it was just kinda awkward. So now I just gotta wait to see when/if I hear from her. What do you guys think? A friend said I probably wont hear from her for at least a week since she's going to be starting a new job and all that. Makes sense...but as expected my phone hasn't left my side and I keep checking it and my email to see if she sent something...ugh I drive myself crazy

[neverknow]

ok another update...I had an email from her when I woke up this morning. It was pretty short, just kinda said she's happy she quit and has a job closer to her home and she wished me good luck in anything I do. I replied back, just saying I'm glad she's happy and to keep in touch and let me know how she likes her new job. Can I get some ladies' perspective on her email? I know obviously hearing from her is a good sign, if she didn't want to talk again she wouldn't have emailed me at all, but I dunno the whole good luck and stuff was kinda weird...I dunno maybe she just didn't know what to say. I'm trying to force myself to ignore all my questions running through my mind and just be happy she emailed me, but it's hard. Any help would be appreciated

[Horseyguy]

Well I have to say I wasn't expecting her to contact you.

Figured she wasn't that into you and was just being nice, and the new job gave her an out, by that I mean she had no reason to contact you and could have just gone to her new job and never contacted you again

Yet she did....

So at a minimum she was thinking about you enough to send an email ... so maybe she does like you after all and does want to keep in contact, otherwise why bother with the email?

I think you need to make a move one way or the other before you go and do your head in.

Ask her out, if she says yes that's cool but if she rejects you at least you can then deal with that and move on knowing you at least tried

Best way to ignore all your questions is to force the issue one way or another. If you do nothing you will just continue to second guess yourself

[courtney90]

I think you shoud just go for it and ask her out...for coffee or dinner...whichever you feel more comfortable with asking! You don't have anything to lose...trust me you will feel much better after you ask her even if she does reject you. I mean before when the two of you still worked together I can see why you were hesitant but now you don't work together so even if she does reject you it wont be weird at work since she has a new job. But from everything you have said about her actins, seems to me like she has some level of feelings for you becuase I would consider that to be flirting. Good luck and be sure to keep us updated!