She was so into me and then out of nowhere broke up with me

[kelvinw]

Alright so i was in a relationship with this girl, everything was perfect but then she just come out of nowhere and said that she can't be with me because she can never last in relationships. The thing is the week before she broke up with me she wrote a beautiful valentines card saying "i am so glad i had a chance to meet you because you just make me so happy. i absolutely love spending time with you and every time i'm with you i just can't help smiling. I am such a lucky girl to get to call you my boyfriend. you are amazing". And then a few days later on a text she also wrote " you are so incredible, i really don't deserve you. I really really never want to do anything to ever push you away from me".

How can she write all this and be so into me and then just not want to be with me? She doesn't even want to talk to me now

[steviej]

How old is she? Could just be immaturity, hormones and infatuation. She might very well have meant those things at the time but then her feelings changed, women are very ruled by emotions and can seem to act irrationally. Unfortunately there is nothing you can do, she doesn't want to talk to you, only thing i would advise is no contact, try and move on. You will find someone who won't mess you around!

[kelvinw]

She is 18. A lot of her friends are in relationships, but i guess they must just be mature..I've been told by her friends that she has done much the same thing to her last 3 relationships. A positive for me though is her dad told me she has been the closest with me but i guess that doesn't really mean anything. She was just so into me and was such a relationship type of girl until she just 'changed'...
Yeah i guess your right. She doesn't even want to see or talk to me then why am i wasting my time. I really wished it would have worked but i guess it just wasn't meant to be unfortunately...

thanks for the reply

[Yet another guy]

She was just using you. Don't look back.

[kelvinw]

Also forgot to say she only lost her virginity last year and she was very uncomfortable with it. Don't know if that could be part of the problem.

[steviej]

She has problems, issues and growing up to do. As strong as your feelings may be you will feel a lot better in not too much time. Just do the usual tricks to get past it (friends, keeping busy etc etc) and you'll be fine.

[xxazurexx]

Her ex probably came back on the scene.

Whatever, she couldn't have had any feelings for you, because true feelings can't be just switched off like a lightbulb.

[want2behappy]

Sorry to say it, but I think that is a big red flag. Maybe she knows that she wouldn't be able to maintain a relationship and she is protecting you...and, sorry, but maybe you should let her. If she is doing something that erratic then I would consider it a blessing and be grateful it wans' t years (hopefully not) or you were not married.

Don't over look the red flags....it only makes it worse later on.

Why waste your time trying to figure stuff out that she doesn't want you to? Give yourself a little down time to recover and then get back out there and find someone without this issue. Good Luck!!

[kelvinw]

I think she has a few problems in the head. I'm actually now good friends with some of her friends and every time i tell one of them i was with her they all go 'ohhhh her' :/ I really wish someone had told me this is the way she is before i got so into her Feel like ive completely wasted my time. I think she has already moved onto the next guy now.... she must get some sort of enjoyment out of playing with guys hearts... She literally doesn't even want to see or talk to me again even though she was so close to me. Very very heartless.
I'm just happy she didn't lead me on for longer.
Getting one back on her though by becoming good friends with her friends and she doesn't even know

[Bonfire]

kevinw, I feel your pain. I know how that is. Went through it once with a girl from work. We dated a few months and she even said I'm the best thing that has ever happen to her and she was happy. Then two weeks later, "let's just be friends." Yea out of no where. It left me totally confused. I try to ask her why, and her answer was she isn't ready for a relationship, more bs basically. Then several months I found out she was dating someone else. From that day on, even though I was young back then I learned never to trust what a girl says totally. I learn to read them better by their actions and reading between the lines. Over the years it has help me to understand women better. Take it as a learning experience. And not all girls are like this, there are girls who genuinely means what they say and doesn't play these types of games.

Edit: oops just realize this is a female advice forum. carry on.