Was I bad?

[Cinnabella]

Okay I have been in a bad situation yesterday. And wonder if it's the guys's fault or mine. My friends said it was his fault, but I feel guilty for this.

There was a guy added me on Fb some months ago, he wrote me n stuff n since I saw he wasn't my type- the look( he look rough and I'm not going to be unpolite but looks old for his age), he's already older than me 10 years. I'm 26 n he is 36 n the rough look made it worse, in any case I don't want a relationship now either, because I still miss my ex, which won't be nice to anyone. I want to be totally over my ex before get to another relationship.

And he's from Canada, he wrote me to say about visiting, I didn't reply or just said something like what r you doing around here? He said for meeting me, well.,, okay I didn't reply.

Then he catches me while I was online on facebook, i kept telling I still miss my ex, omg I think this is big turn off for guys? Then I kept talking about ex n ex, he said he wanted to have a chance n still I showed no interest, but my biggest mistake was not saying no right away, just I said no with a few good looking guy before that, I didn't want to hurt his feelings. I thought he was joking for coming to Another country just to meet someone he doesn't know about but just the Look.

He came, omg I was shocked, I thought this only happens to young teenage boys? He's probably because of my look coz he said I look even prettier in real... Then I met him once yesterday- Polite. My friend was sitting there with me n we didn't feel comfortable, I really showed my annoying face I admit, coz I didn't hope that meeting, my friend said he looked really old n he must be lie aboit his age, I dunno.

Today, I texted him saying that I can show him around but friends is maximum, and he was mad saying like he didn't come all that way n waste money to come just for being friends, plus he thought I was rude coz I talked loudly, and my facial actions showed my disappointedment, I don't Refuse that n said he looked same as pics So I have no reason for hopeless. And I talked loudly coz the music was so big n can't hear what he said OMG.

I feel bad, he said there r no friendship between F n M plus I was rude to him. And what is he doing!? Pursue me due to my look. I really don't want to hurt anyone,I have been hurted like hell after broken up n I wanna be straight to clear up any hopes, I don't like guys that older than me 10+, is it that I did bad? I should of refuse by saying no instead of being polite, in my head I thought he was joking as it was a dumb decision to meet someone who doesn't show interest In you, but I still feel guilty that he's around here alone n he's now refuse friendship. I just feel Bad, man. Was I wrong?


"AS I WALKED OVER TO U, UR FACIAL EXPRESSION, SPOKE LOUDLY,,, U WERE VERY DISAPPOINTED.. I WASNT WHAT UD HOPED (physically), THAT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH CHEMISTRY.. U JUDGED ME AND DIDNT LIKE ME RIGHT AT THAT MOMENT... WHEN ONE SIDE HAS ALREADY MADE THRER DECISION, CHEMISTRY, CANT HAPPEN. UR DECISION WAS SUPERFICIAL.. IT WAS 100% based on physical...BUT, IT IS WHAT IT IS, IT DOESNT MATTER" this is one of his text.

[qwertz]

Youre right, you should have just said no, and when talkin on chat you shouldnt have invited him if you werent interested. You led him on. You deserve to feel bad.

[WICKED THOUGHTS]

Dont lead guys on. Its not very nice specially if guys dont take hints well duh.

[Bonfire]

That guy is a bit of a creeper to be honest, not because of his age but because he flew to another country to meet a girl he barely knew? He's a nut. What were you thinking meeting him in person?

[leoben]

Yeah, i'm not sure on what planet a 36 year old (or older?) guy would think a little online flirting means he should hop on a plane and fly over. Plus being shot down is just part of the business of dating, you don't owe him anything for what he did.

Right now he's just trying to guilt you into sleeping with him since he got nowhere on your first meeting. Don't fall for it.

[bloodtippedrose]

You need to be more upfront with guys. If you werent interested you needed to tell him that right way so you didnt waste either of your times. Also he just flew over for sex sounds like. Or to marry you or something psycho. What did he expect out of you the first time you guys meet? Don't lead on guys that youre not interested in and especially DONT GIVE YOUR ADDRESS to guys online that youve never met before!

[leoben]

He flew over because he thought the grand gesture might make up for him looking as old as the pharaohs and it kind of worked, was flattering enough that it got him a meeting. In the end though that wrinkled old shell couldn't be overcome.

That's the risk you take when you decide to pursue a girl, especially one much younger that isn't showing any serious interest in you.

[Cinnabella]

I had never showed any interest in him, never replied his emails n stuff, only when he catched me online I also never lead him on, he was like selling himself or something lol.

He sent me a text saying I never gave him Any attention from the start, I sent that text to one of guys friends asked if it showed that he knew I never interest in him from the start, n the guy said yes it was clear on text. He was throwing himself to here :-O.

This is his text that knew already about my 0 interest" I UNDERSTAND ABOUT CHEMISTY, BUT THAT IN LARGE IS PHYSICAL.. AT LEAST IN THIS CASE IT IS... IF I DIDNT ASK QUESTIONS, OR DO ANY TALKING, NOTHING WOULD HAVE BEEN SAID... U ALREADY HAD MADE UR CONCLUSION ABOUT ME BEFORE I EVEN SPOKE A WORD.."

I do care of the look, I don't like guys that look so much older than me no matter how old is he.


I'm a traditional girl in love, so no way he could find any silly sexual activities :-@.

Oh no way he knew my address, on my facebook there is only my town's name. That's all he knew :-O, omg this is weird I don't think anyone could act this way at 36 years old? In any case I still feel bad for him.

[Cinnabella]

Yes and I would learn from this, to be harsh not just showing no interest :-@. This guy is just weird in list of guys. Can't force me to love if I don't feel attract.