Worst day of my life! I cant even believe it...help!! :( :(

[smarties]

I've cross posted this on other sites, with no luck at all, hopefully you can help.

Been with my boyfriend a year and a half and out of the bloom he told me today that hes gave and receive oral sex with one person on two different occasions before he got with me. I actually feel sick and don't know how to accept it. Bearing in mind we are very young :/

I feel so confused and can't look at him in the same way, i feel so ashamed i joined here today and don't wish to put my name i feel that disgusted, it's an awful feeling

I'm not homophobic in the slightest, i have gay relatives and friends but i just cannot accept it because he DOESN'T seem like that at all , especially when i know the boy who he done it with quite well
Can someone please help

[devonbrown]

I am not sure what kind of help you are looking for here. If you can't accept what he has done in his past then break up with him. No judgment on right or wrong, you could feel the same way no matter what he has done in the past. It is just a matter of whether you can deal with it. From the sound of your post, you can't, so move on.

Good luck.

[bartown22]

Its in the past, lots of people experiment, I would just forget about it.

[jb1111983]

I agree with devonbrown. If it's something you can't accept then leave him.

[Saya]

You just have to accept it or this relationship will not work.
Everyone has some kind of past experience, it's life experience so you just have to accept that.

[MrE]

Yeah, not sure how to help here. Ultimately it's your problem, and you know the options. You can either accept it and move on, or leave him.

(true story) - When my wife told me she had sexual relations with another woman prior to me, I begged to join in on the next one, that's how open-minded I am. But that's just me.

[IncognitoSir]

If you love him for him, what's the problem. You know he's not gay, he was just honest with you....apparently too honest, but you should love him for who he is. If you find you can't love him, due to his past, break up with him immediately.

[blinki]

i wouldn't worry about it unless he was still doing it now, while he is with you. other than that, like everybody said, you'll have to accept it or move on.

trust me, thinking about who my partner has been with before makes me sick too, but i can't change it, so i just get over it. i have to accept it if i want to keep him, because carrying on about it isn't very good or healthy for the relationship.

[leoben]

Once is an experiment, twice well..........

It does seem weird he is bringing this up all of a sudden. Have you noticed any changes in his level of affection and interest?

[reeba]

I agree with leobon. Why bring it up now?

Is he coming out of the closet? Because now the year and a half old secret is confessed. He has to know you will tell someone. And he has to know there will be some reprucussions.

[michaelmp]

i'd say identify why it is you feel the way you do. if it's for good reason or even a reason you can't get over...then I'd move on. If it's because you're insecure or secretly have some kind of issue with bisexuality, then maybe you should reevaluate yourself and your stance. Good luck to you...