Does my boyfriend like his sister better than me?

[kittehluva]

He hates formal occasions/dressing up. In HS complained about going to my proms and tried to bribe me out of them. His sister got engaged and he has to be an usher (treated like groomsmen) at her wedding. That requires 1,000 times more formality/dressing up and he hasn't complained a bit and I do KNOW he'd choose a prom over ushering a wedding! Importance of prom date vs. usher is debatable, but I feel like he shouldn't complain about either. I'm thinking maybe he sees it as that he has to go cause its a family obligation, but he asked me to marry him so that (should) mean I'm his family, too and at least as important! Again not complaining that he is willing to be usher just that he wasn't as willing to take me to prom.

P.S. I don't know if its relevant but he says I can look "good, but not great" and not wear sparkles/bright colors so that way his sister won't feel like I look better or am taking away attention from her.

[vashti]

Are you seriously complaining that he is willingly participating in his sister's wedding? Aww, jeezus. Don't get married.

[kittehluva]

Are you seriously complaining that he is willingly participating in his sister's wedding? Aww, jeezus. Don't get married.

I'm not complaining that he is willing to put up w/ her wedding I just feel like he should be as willing to put up w/ my prom.

[surfhb]

And you want to get married?? Do you realize the amount of Human BS you have to deal with in a marriage and you're concerned about this?

[Spring Haze]

Has he taken you to the prom/is he going to, or what?

I do KNOW he'd choose a prom over ushering a wedding!

Evidently not.

[vashti]

If you are still talking about going to prom, you aren't old enough to get married, and you are not his family. In the big scheme of things, proms are a very unimportant (albeit fun) day, unless you are still a child.

And he is correct in saying it is inappropriate for wedding guests to try to one-up the bride. It's her day; let her have it. Your turn will come.

[VincenzoG91]

The average American wedding these days costs $29,000.

Wedding > prom.

[Mathias]

If you are still talking about going to prom, you aren't old enough to get married, and you are not his family. In the big scheme of things, proms are a very unimportant (albeit fun) day, unless you are still a child.

And he is correct in saying it is inappropriate for wedding guests to try to one-up the bride. It's her day; let her have it. Your turn will come.

This. It's the most important day in his sister's life.

If he doesn't want to go to prom, go with someone else.

[qwertz]

What an insecure post.

[hello1]

Its his sister wedding. Give me a break and grow up

[Mathias]

I'm not complaining that he is willing to put up w/ her wedding I just feel like he should be as willing to put up w/ my prom.

They're not the same thing.

You're less important than his sister. As you should be.

HTH.

[VincenzoG91]

If the OP is looking for drama, I think that a catfight at the wedding would be exciting and memorable for everybody there.

[HeartIsAching]

What an insecure pest.

Fixed it for you.

[fun2bwith45]

[QUOTE=kittehluva;708545Importance of prom date vs. usher is debatable[/QUOTE]

He's not just an usher, he's an usher for possibly the most important day/event in his sister's life. It really isn't debatable, except for you because you obviously don't place any importance on his sister's wedding.

[hithere]

WOW. Seriously?? This is his sister's wedding. You said he took you to prom and complained about dressing up. How long ago was that? This is the most important day in his sister's life, even if he is just an usher for the wedding he is still her brother and it is important he do what will make that day go by as smooth as possible, we all know weddings don't always go as planned hahaha. You said it was in HS so I am guessing you two are at least in college by now so maybe you should grow up first. For people with strong family connections, immediate family will always come first especially when you two aren't married. You say he asked you to marry him? If he did and you are still just calling him your boyfriend then you must have said no so what does that say about you. Also, this isn't a debate between prom date and usher, this is a debate over prom date and a wedding and the wedding will win every time.