Boyfriend has just told me he has a baby

[19charlotte82]

I have been seeing a guy fr a year. It's been love since the first date, I thought he was mr perfect, he'd text me to tell me how much he loves me, he'd buy me flowers, my friends and family all adore him. He is a single dad to two little girls who I have started to bond with. A few moths ago I got a facebook message saying "ask your man about his new baby girl, everyone knows about it but you". I didn't think twice about it because previously he had been getting messages telling him I was cheating on him (all lies), so I just assumed it was the same person. I told him about the messages but didn't ask if they were true as I didn't feel that I had too. He has just left my flat after now telling me that it is true, following a brief fling with someone just before he started seeing me. We had a big argument and I told him to get out. I feel like a total fool and like the past year that I thought was so perfect was just a big lie. He was crying and said the reason he didn't tell me was because he didn't want to lose me. I don't know what to do, I feel like I have been punched in the stomach. I can't believe he'd lie to me like this but I still love him. I can't talk to any of my friends because I feel like such an idiot for letting them all think he was so great. Help.

[oldskool83]

well...he didnt cheat o ya so if you like him and he likes you id say go for it. could be worse...trust me way worse

[Mathias]

well...he didnt cheat o ya so if you like him and he likes you id say go for it. could be worse...trust me way worse

Yes, but he's been lying about her pregnancy for a year. That's awful.

[surfhb]

Yep! You got punched in the stomach! Is there something we can do or say to make you feel better? I wish you luck and hope you find another guy who treats you with a little more respect

[Mathias]

And your friends will empathize - please spend some time with them. They want your happiness - they don't give a shit about him.

[19charlotte82]

I guess the advice I'm after is, I was so happy, should I throw it all away? Or try and make it work?

[Mathias]

I guess the advice I'm after is, I was so happy, should I throw it all away? Or try and make it work?

You're not going to be happy after this.

Leave before you torture yourself with him.

[surfhb]

I guess the advice I'm after is, I was so happy, should I throw it all away? Or try and make it work?

OMG! Heavens no! Run, Run away!!! I know its hard but have a little respect....this guy is a prick!!! Arent you mad at him? Did he betray you? Do you still trust him? Does your heart rate increase when you think about it? do you want to help support him emotionally with all these 'love babies" he's having? Are you looking forward to hear him bitch about the child support payments he will be dealing with?

Want me to go on?

[oldskool83]

i found out my ex gf was in depbt 20K to the ire after 1.5 years....i was pissed a a week and brushed it off. ur call. id make him come over and talk

[Petit Papillon]

He sounds a bit like a Baby Machine, it's possible that you'd be next incubator... Really, couldn't he tell you from the start ? It depends on you how much are you able to accept. Can you accept him and his 3 kids and 2 mothers of those kids? Cause they will be in your lives forver. I personally think you shouldn't stay with him ,but it depends on you .

[Mathias]

i found out my ex gf was in depbt 20K to the ire after 1.5 years....i was pissed a a week and brushed it off.

You can't see how these situations are much different?

[surfhb]

LOL....Yeah. 20K in the hole vs a Baby he lied about having arent even in the same ballpark. These are BFs and GFs were talking about here so so theres no great commitment. Move on I say....but then again, its easy for me sitting behind a keyboard and monitor.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

He never lied about the baby.

[surfhb]

He was crying and said the reason he didn't tell me was because he didn't want to lose me.

He never lied about the baby.

Say again?

[VincenzoG91]

He never lied about the baby.

That's not good enough. It's obviously important information that he should have shared but chose to keep secret. This kind of omission is just as bad as a lie.