Trying to reconcile, please help

[lifemess]

Aaaw.. now i feel shitty again, like i should let him go or something..

[lifemess]

there are NO absolutes in life.. im just saying the culture and the social aspects of life are different now then they were back then

Yeah, you're right they are

[DarkHelmet82]

stop doing this! you are imagining crap in your head.. I do the SAME THING.. and Im still doing it....i almost died 3 months ago from the stress I put on myself.. you need to control yourslef the best you can

[lifemess]

Yeah you're probably right..... I'm torturing myself.

[lifemess]

So, now my head has gone mad again.. he hasn't texted me for hours, and he usually texts me around this time when he goes to bed.... lol. This is how my head works..........

[DarkHelmet82]

im the same way.. and im a GUY... i checked.. yes I have a penis.. lol... dont overanalyze it........

[lifemess]

The thing is, if he doesn't text me at all - i'll get suspicious and it will eat me up inside before i fall asleep, and in the morning when i wake up and see that he still hasn't texted me anything.....

Did you make contact with her btw?

[DarkHelmet82]

Not yet.. i will in a couple hours... im real nervous. maybe he wants you to contact him first? Wait it out.. just because he doesnt text you doenst mean anything... he could be playing games......

[Mathias]

Jesus. He has you wrapped around his finger, and you're playing right into it.

Stop it.

[DarkHelmet82]

thanks i think she will respond.. ill let u know.. have a good sleep

[lifemess]

Jesus. He has you wrapped around his finger, and you're playing right into it.

Stop it.

I know, it's so tragic..... Teach me how to not think about it.. Or tell me some wise words so I can sleep..

[DarkHelmet82]

just dont think about it..

[Mathias]

I know, it's so tragic..... Teach me how to not think about it.. Or tell me some wise words so I can sleep..

Tylenol PM.

[DarkHelmet82]

hows it goin life?

[lifemess]

I'm not sure. He did write me good night yesterday, and i was asleep so i didnt reply. When i woke up he had wrote me good morning message, and i forgot to reply and about an hour after he asked me if i was alive.. So clearly he entered some sort of panic mode cause i didn't reply.

He seems to be writing more text messages then he did before, especially he have today.. and he even send me a mms with a heartshaped stone and he had carved my initials in it, even though he is at work.
I find everything quite confusing and i have my panic attacks now and then, that this might never be or that he's just using me.. Cause i dont get how he can act like this and say he wants us to be together again more than anything, but still doesn't want to.
Sometimes i feel like i should back out while i still can, but the other part of me wants to stay to se if it does work out, cause that's all i really want. And i got a chance...

Even though i feel so exited when he does text me or send me and mms like that, it kinda brings me down, cause i know he doesn't mean anything more by it. I get my hopes up, and then they are washed away again when i think it over. Also i dont know how to reply without sounding over excited, or like i dont care.. there has to be a balance.
He did use to send me different kinds of pictures/mms similar to the one i got today when we were together, that's why i really got confused. So it's like i get this warm feeling every time he texts me, but then my brain goes: ****, what should i reply?
the worst thing ever is when he doesn't reply back, even though it's not something he needs to reply to.. cause your head tells you that you might have wrote something wrong..



How are you? did you make contact?