Should I let my ex know I'll be in the same music festival?

[Kilocake]

So, I'm supposed to go to a music festival this weekend with some friends, but my ex is going to it too (with other people). I sort of don't want to tell her so if I see her it will be a giant surprise BUT there's a chance it will make her really uncomfortable if I do that. Alternately I could tell her first which would fix that potential for harm but it will wreck any surprise dramatic reunions.

I would be lying if I said I wouldn't like to get her back but I'm prepared for the fact that that is not likely and she'll as likely as not be there with some other dude. I think I can handle that ok but what doesn't help the matter is that I tried to get her back via a really emotional letter and now we don't talk (though there is no reason I couldn't call).

What the heck should I do?

[Pilotdxb]

if you can handle it, why do you care?

she doesnt own the festival, and unless you have similar friend, you probably wont even see her.

[Wakeup]

Leave her alone and let her go out with her friends without you bugging her. Just because you want her back doesn't mean she wants to go back to you. Quit being so selfish.

[surfhb]

agreed! Which festival?

[devonbrown]

Do the math - how many people will probably be at this festival? She is one out of that many. There is just as good of a chance you won't see her there.

Except for the fact that it sounds like you would be looking for her so you can have a "dramatic reunion." The other option you suggest is to call her ahead of time, which is totally unnecessary. By the way, both of these things sound just a tad stalkerish.

Move on, she is your ex-girlfriend. If you run into her at the festival, say hello, be polite, and then continue to do your own thing.

good luck

[Kilocake]

I asked her what she though via text and she said she doesn't want to see me. I'm half way glad and half way sad I asked. I'm not a stalker because I know where she lives and I don't go there...now I feel like saying **** it to this whole deal, how could I deal with it if I saw her? Just pretend I don't? This is ****ed up!!! It's Bonnaroo btw, and there will be a million people so I probably won't see her. Good God though! If I knew that woman could be that cold when I met her, I never would have talked to her ass. Unbelievable!

All that dramatic meeting talk was just the product of a life of watching too many movies, I didn't expect it.

[Wakeup]

I don't understand why all the people who have been broken up with assume that their ex would still want them in their lives in some capacity. There is such a thing as "an ending" and the choice to end should be respected while the one rejected should heal and get on with their lives without the ex in it.

[Boisdevie]

Your relationship is OVER. So move on and stop wasting time thinking about the past. The past has been and gone. Stop obsessing. Get a grip