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Thread: Do I contact him again?

  1. #1
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    Do I contact him again?

    If a guy texts you asking "if you're home for the nite", which by the way was at 1am, then I respond a cpl days later asking if hes off work today. I get a simple...NO. I had not been in the habit of visiting him at that time BTW.
    Have not heard back since.
    "If I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain"

    Emily Dickinson

  2. #2
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    You seem to be attracted to jerks.
    Good decisions come from experience. Experience comes from bad decisions.

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    I know Vincenzo, Im caught...its my ex. I make myself sick, lol but I still dont get it. Seems like head games still.
    "If I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain"

    Emily Dickinson

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    I thought you were 'getting to know some guy?'

    Why would you respond to an asshole who thought it was alright to disrespect you by contacting you at that time of the morning. Nothing good could have come from you responding at that time. Nothing. If he was interested in anything serious he would contact you at a more appropriate time of day. Please do NOT be hopeful or curious about something so benign. Don't enable him to play mind games with you.

    *Don't contact him again. He's your ex and how do you expect to get to the stage of indifference to him if you're enabling him to play with you?
    Last edited by Wakeup; 14-06-11 at 10:04 AM. Reason: to add *
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

  5. #5
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    Its just easier to refer to him as some guy at this point because thats what he is. I wouldnt mind if it was a so called booty call but its wierd how it was out of the blue. The week before we were supposed to go(as friends) to a car race but it got rained out, so i figured we were both on the same page...sort of..finally. Then this? Im not reading into it but it really does seem like after all these years hes palying mind games when if anything i should be playing with him, so to speak.
    "If I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain"

    Emily Dickinson

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by abn25 View Post
    Its just easier to refer to him as some guy at this point because thats what he is. I wouldnt mind if it was a so called booty call but its wierd how it was out of the blue. The week before we were supposed to go(as friends) to a car race but it got rained out, so i figured we were both on the same page...sort of..finally. Then this? Im not reading into it but it really does seem like after all these years hes palying mind games when if anything i should be playing with him, so to speak.
    I'm totally confused by you and your thinking. If you stopped having sex with some guy so that you could get to know him without sex clouding the "getting to know" part then why are you back burnering him in the sex department when you still are obviously not over your ex? That is what everyone meant about not wanting to stay with someone who is so confused... nothing usually good in it for the one at the end of your confusion.

    Don't respond to his bullshit. It's not worth the emotional/mental hassle. Truly get to know the new guy (you've stopped having sex with to get to know) by not clouding your knowledge with thoughts of your mind fvcker of an ex boyfriend. Start being good to yourself and have the self worth to let someone go from your life in all aspects (even "friendship") who only considers you an option or booty or good to call at 1:00am ... pfffft.
    Last edited by Wakeup; 14-06-11 at 10:14 AM.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

  7. #7
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    Sorry for the confusion, but he has me confused. This is the same guy. Dont take me wrong becasue Im a big girl and can handle myself pretty well, his actions actually dont match his words when we've talked. I do think he is mindf**cking me though. I have not responded, neither has he.
    "If I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain"

    Emily Dickinson

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    ?????

    What's so intriguing or fun about being confused and mind fvcked? I'd go cold turkey from him. He can't even be straight up about wanting a booty call. Nothing worse then a mind fvcker IMO. They'll drive you nuts and steal your joy faster than anything.
    Last edited by Wakeup; 14-06-11 at 10:55 AM. Reason: typo
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

  9. #9
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    Instead of a booty call, maybe he just wanted reassurance that you weren't with somebody else at that time. It's a control thing.
    Good decisions come from experience. Experience comes from bad decisions.

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    Quote Originally Posted by abn25 View Post
    Sorry for the confusion, but he has me confused. This is the same guy. Dont take me wrong becasue Im a big girl and can handle myself pretty well, his actions actually dont match his words when we've talked. I do think he is mindf**cking me though. I have not responded, neither has he.
    He's been using you like a toy for a while and you consistently enable him. Why even post on here? Regardless of his actions you're going to go running back to him. I'm kind of annoyed you waste my time opening and reading your threads, as you ignore any and all advice and just run back to a guy that thinks of you as nothing more than a blowup doll.

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by VincenzoG91 View Post
    Instead of a booty call, maybe he just wanted reassurance that you weren't with somebody else at that time. It's a control thing.
    If that is true then yet another reason why she should give up on this douche. Who wants someone who doesn't want to be with them, while in the same breath not wanting her to be with anyone else.

    He's got her making a fool out of herself on this board by calling others "morons" when she knows who she was calling morons were telling her the absolute truth. That's called denial.

    I have not responded, neither has he.
    *I suggest you wait until he contacts you again (don't hold your breath) and when he does tell him that you have moved on and that you wish him well. NC after that.

    It's obvious by your postings that he's winning this game.
    Last edited by Wakeup; 14-06-11 at 11:23 PM. Reason: to add *
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

  12. #12
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    No, you'd not contact him again.. he showed he is not so interested in you..

  13. #13
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    Look what I do and what I post is up to me, if I am so interesting that you cant help but open my posts and then insist on being rude (not just your opinion) thats up to you dont blame me. I appreciate unbiased advice, not the same people throwing stones also not liking being thrown at. You have no idea by just a few posts what our relationship is but I can assure you Im not allowing myself to be used in any way right now, hence the needing advice. This has nothing to do with not wanting to hear the so called "truth" that you have all categorized this into but you need to stop the personal attacks, its just uncalled for on here...thanks
    Last edited by abn25; 15-06-11 at 08:39 AM.
    "If I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain"

    Emily Dickinson

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gratedwasabi View Post
    He's been using you like a toy for a while and you consistently enable him. Why even post on here? Regardless of his actions you're going to go running back to him. I'm kind of annoyed you waste my time opening and reading your threads, as you ignore any and all advice and just run back to a guy that thinks of you as nothing more than a blowup doll.
    see above...
    "If I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain"

    Emily Dickinson

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by abn25 View Post
    Look what I do and what I post is up to me, if I am so interesting that you cant help but open my posts and then insist on being rude (not just your opinion) thats up to you dont blame me. I appreciate unbiased advice, not the same people throwing stones also not liking being thrown at. You have no idea by just a few posts what our relationship is but I can assure you Im not allowing myself to be used in any way right now, hence the needing advice. This has nothing to do with not wanting to hear the so called "truth" that you have all categorized this into but you need to stop the personal attacks, its just uncalled for on here...thanks
    the bottom line is he does not value you and you are an option to this man. No man who wants to be with you would go days and days without contact. He may have agreed to step away from sex while you get to know him, but he's not giving you an opportunity to get to know him. You know what the score is, you just don't want to face it yet.

    Who said anything about him using you. He doesn't see you enough to "use" you for anything.

    No one is "personal attacking" you. We are holding a mirror up to the situation and you don't like what you see. Or, you refuse to actually look would be more accurate.
    I appreciate unbiased advice,
    No, what you appreciate is getting what you want to hear.

    ** When a man values you. He will not play games with you or fail to contact you for days/weeks on end.
    Last edited by Wakeup; 15-06-11 at 09:48 AM.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

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