No Contact = Success

[flynhayn]

2 Months, 3 weeks. That's how long it took to get to this point.... which is where I can honestly and truly say that I'm over it. COMPLETELY over it. No more wondering why, no more thoughts and hopes of reconciliation, no more wishing things happened differently, no more "what ifs". Just closure and reassurance that I am a badass

From here on out, it's win-win. If in the future she gets her act together and comes back, then awesome... But it no longer matters if she does or not. My life is now 100% focused on me and taking advantage of all the things I can now do on my own.

I'm only saying this for all the people on here who keep wondering about NC.... maybe this will help a little bit. The point is, once you know your relationship can't be salvaged (or shouldn't be salvaged), this is still the best thing to do. It's the hardest thing to do, but worth every frustrating second it took getting here. It's going to take some people a little longer than me. Others can do it faster than me. Regardless, I'm just glad that I didn't give in. Sure, there were a couple of things I wished I could have said or done, but I wouldn't be at this point had I done it. I would have had to start all over again and who knows how much longer I'd be suffering because of it. You CAN give yourself closure after a breakup. You don't need a damn thing from the other person to move on.

So for anyone who is maybe a little hesitant to do it this way, don't be. I can vouch for it.

[Cerby]

I'm on day 2!

[flynhayn]

I'm on day 2!

Haha! Yeah buddy

[DarkHelmet82]

um not even 4 hours yet.. lol... but yeah

[Cerby]

um not even 4 hours yet.. lol... but yeah

You were getting there, but you got hooked up on a final communication. You should now try and actually move on.

[DarkHelmet82]

That was my plan...

[confusius]

A little bit more than a month. Yooohooo! lol. I hope I'll keep this up. I'm still VERY tempted to contact her.

[tremolo]

It's day 20 for me and I feel so torn up inside... this was encouraging to read. Thank you

[curiousgurl29]

Wow! good for you

[Cerby]

My only problem is I see my ex at work sometimes, although she is in a different department, a hallway walk-pass is inevitible, it happens at least once a week.

[elijah121]

dang. pick me upper. I am almost a month after trying to reconcile our relationship after a break up in novemeber. We tried for 2 months to see if we can be in a relationship, didn't work out for her so i said it's time for me to move on, i won't call you and please don't bother calling me. I was doing amazing until i got a minor set back from a mutual friend but i am on the ropes again and starting to feel better. If it wasn't for NC i would be doomed but this is the best way! She asks about me to my friends but i tell them don't bother telling me anything because i never ask about her to any of you ever. Sometimes things slip out of their mouth but its all good. As long as she is happy with her life i can move on with mine and find happiness through my own means. Don't kill yourself over someone who doesn't want to be a part of your life, if they wanted to be they would be right there beside you. In time there is someone who will come along no doubt about it, move on get over your ex so you can give your all to that person without comparing what you had. NC all the way!

[Deeza07]

Took me 7 months after the breakup between my husband and I...its now been 18 months separated and I've just started divorce proceedings. Although it hurts at the start, no contact is definitely the way to go to get over someone.

[flynhayn]

Oh yes... the temptation is always there. It just comes with the territory.... every once in a while that emptyness will catch up to you and feel strong enough to make you consider breaking NC. That, on top of simply missing that person and the everyday things you used to do together. Getting past that is what builds you into a stronger person. When you stay strong enough to avoid that temptation, you grow from it.... and that growth is permanent. I've always felt that the people who are ambitious, hard-working, and smart with people most likely developed those traits based off of failures in relationships somewhere.... whether it be family relationships, friendships, or romantic interests.

This isn't the first time I've had to do it but this was definitely the suckiest.... but my experience may be why it only took me just under 3 months. As the time passes, more and more things slowly start to make sense that didn't before. You wouldn't believe how much you learn from YOURSELF.... just from the way your mind starts doing sprints when you're by yourself.

[flynhayn]

um not even 4 hours yet.. lol... but yeah

Haha... come on man I thought you were holding it down already!

[flynhayn]

My only problem is I see my ex at work sometimes, although she is in a different department, a hallway walk-pass is inevitible, it happens at least once a week.

That makes it a lot tougher.... although sometimes just seeing them when passing by every once in a while can be enough to relieve the pain.