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Thread: How can i tell my girlfriend i want to go further?

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    How can i tell my girlfriend i want to go further?

    Me and my girlfriend (both 16 years old) have been together for 6 months now and it's been amazing! We both love each other deeply, but there is one problem. I'm not sure about going about trying to go further with her. Right now we are pretty much at *fooling around* as in using our hands on each other while kissing. I really want to go further sexually and I've tried to do oral but I felt her kind of pulling my head up and I don't want to make her uncomfortable so how can I talk to her about it without being a jerk?

    Oh and i'm new to this forum. Hey all

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    Personally...Id let nature takes its course. Shes obviously not ready but she'll let you know. Bringing up sex kind of takes the passion out of it and puts the logic into it.

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    She isn't ready, simple as that really. You can pressure her into it but that will be the end of the relationship.

    She's only 16, give her a break.

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    ye, she's not ready yet. don't pressure her,really. when she will be she'll let you know...believe me. be patient and it will be just fine. good luck

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    you are with her most of time or you can see and feel better than us that is wants sex or not or she is ready for sex or not.

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    Quote Originally Posted by fuchsia_bee View Post
    ye, she's not ready yet. don't pressure her,really. when she will be she'll let you know...believe me. be patient and it will be just fine. good luck
    Quote Originally Posted by hello1 View Post
    She isn't ready, simple as that really. You can pressure her into it but that will be the end of the relationship.

    She's only 16, give her a break.
    I would never pressure her into anything. It seems like she'll never want to go further though.. Maybe i'm just impatient

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    Quote Originally Posted by Shazamtastic View Post
    I would never pressure her into anything. It seems like she'll never want to go further though.. Maybe i'm just impatient
    Yes you are. Not all girls want have sex when they are 16. Some want to wait till they are a bit older.

    If you can't wait then dump her and find another girl who will have sex with you. But don't pressure her into something she regret later in life

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    JFC, dude! Give her a break....or don't. Maybe her hymen is still intact and she fears the pain that might occur when you unwrap her lucky charms. Take it from me... either two things happen after you open the doors to the Magic Kingdom: a) she is in pain and remembers you as the asshole that caused her pain; or b) she falls insanely in lust for you and will (later) remember you as the asshole who took her virginity and then broke up with her.

    Either way, you won't be forgotten

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    Quote Originally Posted by CAM View Post
    JFC, Take it from me... either two things happen after you open the doors to the Magic Kingdom: a) she is in pain and remembers you as the asshole that caused her pain; or b) she falls insanely in lust for you and will (later) remember you as the asshole who took her virginity and then broke up with her.

    Either way, you won't be forgotten
    Hehe so right,.

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    she's edging towards that age where most girls are ready to lose it....my guess is it's < 6 months away

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    Quote Originally Posted by Shazamtastic View Post
    so how can I talk to her about it without being a jerk?
    At 16, there's no way to talk about it without being a jerk.

    If she's not comfortable with oral, she's probably not going to be comfortable with intercourse. At least, as far as I understand teen sexuality these days.

    Here's the truth man. You're 16, she's 16, you likely won't marry her (Regardless of what your hormones or penis tells you.) and you're going to have plenty of chances to sleep with plenty of women if that's what you want. Don't worry about losing your virginity, don't worry about being pressured, don't worry about any of that. Have fun w/ her, appreciate the experience, and if it happens it happens man. The last thing you want to do is be her first, and have her regret sleeping with you for the rest of her life. Hell, I slept with more women when I was 30, than in the 30 entire 30 years leading up to that point.

    And for FSM's sake, use a damned condom and don't entertain the idea of barebacking it until you're married or fixed.
    "Well, then," the Cat went on, "you see a dog growls when it's angry, and wags its tail when it's pleased. Now I growl when I'm pleased, and wag my tail when I'm angry. Therefore I'm mad."

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    Quote Originally Posted by Lite View Post
    At 16, there's no way to talk about it without being a jerk.

    If she's not comfortable with oral, she's probably not going to be comfortable with intercourse. At least, as far as I understand teen sexuality these days.

    Here's the truth man. You're 16, she's 16, you likely won't marry her (Regardless of what your hormones or penis tells you.) and you're going to have plenty of chances to sleep with plenty of women if that's what you want. Don't worry about losing your virginity, don't worry about being pressured, don't worry about any of that. Have fun w/ her, appreciate the experience, and if it happens it happens man. The last thing you want to do is be her first, and have her regret sleeping with you for the rest of her life. Hell, I slept with more women when I was 30, than in the 30 entire 30 years leading up to that point.

    And for FSM's sake, use a damned condom and don't entertain the idea of barebacking it until you're married or fixed.
    VERY well put. And yeah I know it's unlikely i'll be with her past high school. It's all my hormones trolling me lol

    Quote Originally Posted by hello1 View Post
    Yes you are. Not all girls want have sex when they are 16. Some want to wait till they are a bit older.

    If you can't wait then dump her and find another girl who will have sex with you. But don't pressure her into something she regret later in life
    When I started hanging out with her, before we even got together, I knew she was pretty dedicated to her religion. I am almost positive we won't get to sex, but honestly i'm cool with just oral! And I wouldn't breakup with her just for that reason.. That's something a douche bag would do. Breaking up with a girl because she won't do you is selfish.. At my age at least. If I was an adult it would probably be very different.

    Oh and at first, I didn't want to start dating her at all because of the fact it would be extremely hard to go anywhere sexually because she's religious, but I got stuck on her and can't help but love her XD

  13. #13
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    You can't pressure a girl into it without hurting the relationship. Some 16 year olds are into it, some are not. Some just needs more patience. I think she would be comfortable with it at the 1 year mark.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Shazamtastic View Post
    I would never pressure her into anything. It seems like she'll never want to go further though.. Maybe i'm just impatient
    I have sex before I give head. Head is far more personal to me. So you can't just presume it will be head then sex, though this is generally true. I also waited at year and a half to have sex with my bf for the first time and I was also 18 so my friend in my world... you have a long ass way to go.

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