GF gong to Europe without me!

[simonmagus]

Hello everyone. I am looking for a little advice, or possibly just some reassuring. I will say in advance that I am not a very trusting person, I don't trust anyone except my parents. My girlfriend and her daughter are going to Europe for two weeks soon without me. We have a few trust issues in our relationship. She has cheated on her two previous husbands, one of them with me, and we have been fighting more recently about her inability to communicate with me. She didn't even ask if I wanted to go or even listen when I brought up the idea of going on a vacation together. I am starting to think that she may be actually going with someone else because she doesn't even want me to drop her off or pick her up at the airport. She doesn't think she can call me from Europe because it is too "complicated" to call internationally. In my mind this all adds up to a big red flag. Maybe I should break up with her prior to her leaving so that I don't have to worry while she is gone and I can take the two weeks to get over her without her luring me into getting back together. What do you think? Should I just pretend like I don't care that she is going so that I don't seem insecure, should I tell her about how I feel and see what happens, or should I just dump her?

[smackie9]

OK so you see the red flags, she has a history of infidelity, and your gut is telling you something is up. And you want a stranger's opinion about this? I don't think it's necessary to ask because it's very obvious.

Tip: you take your chances with someone that is willing to cheat on their SO to be with you. It just goes to show you that, yes, you realize it now (too late), that she will have no problem doing it to you too. You should have either kept it a short fling or a "keep away from me you cheating whore".

Now I know those that may have cheated in the past can finally grow up, be remorseful and change, but those excuses are damn stupid. To me she is just moving onto the next sucker.

[smackie9]

Dump her ass.

[IncognitoSir]

Uhhh, wtf. Duhh she's going to cheat on you. Hell, she cheated with you on the last guy she was with before you....so you deserve the bad karma anyways.......Break up with her and pray that's all the bad karma you get for being a cheater along with her.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Yeah, dump.

[kageri]

Why do people even get with someone who is currently cheating to be with them... I don't understand how anyone thinks a good relationship is going to result from that.

[doppelgaenger]

lol, why are you in this relationship if you can't trust her to go to Europe for a few weeks on her own? foolish.

[simonmagus]

Thanks for the help. Good answer.

[Gratedwasabi]

Thanks for the help. Good answer.

You both are cheaters, so who really cares? She's likely already cheating on you. People that cheat always cheat and you obviously aren't anything too special to her when she didn't even consider bringing you and doesn't want to take the effort to call.

[simonmagus]

You both are cheaters, so who really cares? She's likely already cheating on you. People that cheat always cheat and you obviously aren't anything too special to her when she didn't even consider bringing you and doesn't want to take the effort to call.

Apparently you really care, if you didn't you wouldn't have responded. You didn't actually even attempt to answer the question I asked and it seems that your only goal is to criticise. My guess is that you are one of the people who have been cheated on and are upset because you couldn't keep a woman satisfied and now must take out your anger on the "cheaters."

Sweeping statements such as "cheater always cheat" is not only unhelpful, it is ignorant. This statement insinuates that there is something wrong with all cheaters that cause them to cheat. Just for conversation purposes, suppose that I said that "people who are cheated on will always be cheated on." Perhaps this is true because of some kind of personality defect that the cheated upon have in common causing others to not respect them enough to not cheat.

[VincenzoG91]

Sounds like she is going to Europe with some other dude, or meeting up with the next guy there.

[Boisdevie]

We have a few trust issues = we have a really crap relationship.

I do NOT have any trust issues with my GF = we have a really good relationship

Get the difference?

[Gratedwasabi]

Apparently you really care, if you didn't you wouldn't have responded. You didn't actually even attempt to answer the question I asked and it seems that your only goal is to criticise. My guess is that you are one of the people who have been cheated on and are upset because you couldn't keep a woman satisfied and now must take out your anger on the "cheaters."

Sweeping statements such as "cheater always cheat" is not only unhelpful, it is ignorant. This statement insinuates that there is something wrong with all cheaters that cause them to cheat. Just for conversation purposes, suppose that I said that "people who are cheated on will always be cheated on." Perhaps this is true because of some kind of personality defect that the cheated upon have in common causing others to not respect them enough to not cheat.

Eh? No, you see.. I keep MY women satisfied. I don't keep OTHER MEN'S women satisfied. See what I did thar?

That's idiotic. You can't control what other people do to you, you CAN control what you do. Cheaters cheat. Fact. There is something in them that says if things aren't great, find it elsewhere on the downlow. So yes, if you keep a cheater completely and always content they may not cheat. Good luck with that.

She's cheating on you. And, frankly, it's karma for you cheating with her. Go find a woman that is single and without a history of infidelity.

P.S. - Women I date invite me on their trips. :*(

[MerryH]

Eh? No, you see.. I keep MY women satisfied. I don't keep OTHER MEN'S women satisfied. See what I did thar?

P.S. - Women I date invite me on their trips. :*(

Nice.



OP, you don't trust her. Break up with her. Don't date anyone until you can learn to trust people other than your parents.

[hello1]

Someone who cheated on two of their partners obviously is a very selfish person and has low morals.

Will she cheat on you? I bet you a million quid she will, why? because she cheated WITH you, she knows you know what she is like and she may feel like you should expect it coming.