What do men in relationships really think when watching porn?

[Bonfire]

It would seem That i that s the very mindset that bonfire has. He wants to bang them but he doesn't want to commit to them. At least your partner is simply fantasizing and not living that lifestyle.

HUH? I think you are twisting my reasoning a bit there.

[Wakeup]

Trem: I think you're naive.. I say that with love.

[Bonfire]

Some guys use porn when they masturbate. Bonfire uses women much the same way.

And you said I'm not Hugh Hefner. LOL

[Wakeup]

HUH? I think you are twisting my reasoning a bit there.

Oh? My reasoning is logical when applied to this:

Fortunately for me I also enjoy the freedom of singlehood as it allows me to pursue my interests wholeheartedly so I'm not too concern about relationships really, but if the odd chance I meet the right girl then of course that would be awesome.

You sound like you've been raised On DD and Mistry to be honest.

[tremolo]

Trem: I think you're naive.. I say that with love.

No, I think I am probably completely aware of how men work, what they want, and profoundly unhappy about it.

[Bonfire]

I don't think the above comments are fair to Bonfire. I would never get involved with a man who had his mindset about marriage, but having talked quite a bit with Bonfire, I don't get the sense that he's the type of guy who you're describing.

I don't blame them for misunderstanding me. Perception is only a reflection of the self and it's difficult to see it through another's view deeply when the concept may be quite foreign to them.

[Wakeup]

I don't blame them for misunderstanding me. Perception is only a reflection of the self and it's difficult to see it through another's view deeply when the concept may be quite foreign to them.

Rather condenscending.. No?

No, I think I am probably completely aware of how men work, what they want, and profoundly unhappy about it.

You have a misconception about men that torments you. Try to trust the wonderfulness of you more.

[Bonfire]

Oh? My reasoning is logical when applied to this:

You sound like you've been raised On DD and Mistry to be honest.

Not too familiar with DD and Mistry. I'm more of Nietzsche and Thoreau.

[Wakeup]

hahha... touche. Same church different pew.

Tell me is this your fav Nietzsche quote:

Ah, women. They make the highs higher and the lows more frequent.

[Bonfire]

Rather condenscending.. No?

That's just the limitation in communication through verbal means. Hence why I'm seeing these crazy idea of Bonfire's mindset with women. I find them comical though. lol But I'm just trying my best to explain it's not accurate although I can't fault you guys for forming such views.

[smackie9]

No, I think I am probably completely aware of how men work, what they want, and profoundly unhappy about it.

Well I guess there is another alternative you could try.......

[smackie9]

Yea. Because marriage bonds two people together for life, doesn't it? I don't need a piece of paper to tell me I love my girl. I know most people out there needs to validate their relationships or themselves with marriage but I simply don't. I could be with the same girl for life even without the legal binding of marriage. And I should mention I don't plan to have kids either. So marriage becomes even less important. If my relationship doesn't work out, we can split without much hassle. Now you get my reasoning?
.

I'm with you, I've been happily unmarried for over 21 years, and had no desire for kids......but in Canada the laws are different.....he can take half my shit and screw me over large, I would lose my house.

[Katmeow85]

Men have a sex drive that is 1000 more stronger than yours. It's instinctive to look, admire and desire, BUT there is a difference....there isn't emotional attachment to it. Once you get into your 40's this will all make sense to you, but for now...you can't imagine why because you think like a girl. Girls think about everything with some kind of emotional attachment. Guys do NOT imagine being married to these girls or love them or want a future with them...it's just images, body parts, that's it. They save their love and desire to share their live with the women they love.....those images are just visual stimulation....masturbating into a frenzy is just a part of who they are.

I have a higher sex drive than all my ex's and my now boyfriend. I want sex all the time. I don't feel the need to watch porn when I'm in a relationship and I don't look at other men in a sexual way. I do masterbate if my bf hasn't touched me in a very very long time like maybe 2-3 weeks.

I understand men are more visual but it doesn't stop it from hurting. I found him masterbating over porn last monday and now I'm too scared to leave him on his own if I catch him doing it again. Or if I am away from him it is constantly in my brain.

I am insecure but dont think I would be if I didnt know what he looked at. I've talked to him about all of this but it probably wont make any difference and I have to except that men are all like this. Well not all but a high percentage are.

I have to go to counselling because what I feel is apparently wrong.

We also dont have sex as much as Id like and it is making my insecurities worse. Ive lost over 30lbs for what? For him just to ignore my needs. I intiate sex but want him to do it like he used to.

[VincenzoG91]

"It's easier to put on slippers than to carpet the whole world." --Al Franken

[tremolo]

I have a higher sex drive than all my ex's and my now boyfriend. I want sex all the time. I don't feel the need to watch porn when I'm in a relationship and I don't look at other men in a sexual way. I do masterbate if my bf hasn't touched me in a very very long time like maybe 2-3 weeks.

I understand men are more visual but it doesn't stop it from hurting.

I sympathize with all of this.

I have to go to counselling because what I feel is apparently wrong.

I talk to my therapist about these things, but I don't agree that what you're feeling is wrong.

We also dont have sex as much as Id like and it is making my insecurities worse. Ive lost over 30lbs for what? For him just to ignore my needs. I intiate sex but want him to do it like he used to.

I feel the same as you on this as well. When my second to last boyfriend told me I was so unattractive he had to fantasize about other women when we were together, I lost 25 pounds, and now I work out at the gym 15 hours a week. Has it made any noticeable difference in my sex life? No. Although my last boyfriend claimed he was perfectly satisfied with me and wouldn't change a thing about our sex life, he wanted sex much less than me and talked often about strippers, porn stars, and slutty celebrities, as if they were something to be desired and emulated.

You'd think that our efforts would get us somewhere, but apparently not.