Is there real love on earth

[happycow]

I supsect if there is any so called real love on earth, that is so pure, so untainted, so touching, so giving, so uncondtional.....that you can die for her/him.

I have been in several relationships, but men always protect themselves when it comes to self interest. They won't sacrifice their lives for you, like those happenings in romance fiction. Are romance fiction over exaggerating? Am i waiting for something not realistic?

My ex told me his wife is not giving him comfort when his mom passed away. I was suprised. But I could not give it either. But the reality of relationship/marriage gives me a notion that people stay together just out of need, out of habit, instead of out of love. Love does fade in a relationship. I wonder how much love one can hold for oneself before giving it to others? But what makes me wonder most is, if the whole world is full of people who are so self interested, then all relationship/marriages are just preclude for troubles.

[MaidenMinx]

Read a book called Still Life With Woodpecker by Tom Robbins. Yes it is a novel, but it's not your typical romance novel. It's all about how to make love stay.

From page 118

'Who knows how to make love stay?
1. Tell love you are going to Juniors Deli on Flatbush Avenue in Brooklyn to pick up a cheesecake, and if love stays it can have half. It will stay.
2. Tell love you want a momento of it and obtain a lock of it's hair. Burn the hair in a dime-store incense burner with yin/yang symbols on three sides. Face southwest. Talk fast over the burning hair in a convincingly exotic language. Use the ashes of the burnt hair to paint a mustache on your face. Find love. Tell it you are someone new. It will stay.
3. Wake love up in the middle of the night. Tell it the world is on fire. Dash to the window and pee out of it. Casually return to bed and assure love that everything is going to be alright. Fall asleep. Love will be there in the morning.'

And one of my favourite bits on love in general from page 128

'Love is the ultimate outlaw. It just won't adhere to any rules. The most any of us can do is sign on as it's accomplice. Instead of vowing to honour and obey, maybe we should swear to aid and abet. That would mean security is out of the question. The words 'make' and 'stay' become inappropriate. My love for you has no strings attached. I love you for free.'

Even though this is a novel out of all the books on relationships I have read this is THE best book ever about the nature of love. If it wasn't for my signature I would have left my man over some petty crap many times over, instead we keep working on us realising that love isn't always fun, but it's worth it.

[Graham Berkeley]

^^ Thats pretty creepy... I get the message but... Wow, please don't let those words go to your head.


OP, Its interesting you post this. I've been in several relationships where it started off like a romance novel but once the young lady felt safe and secure and like life was wonderful she stopped putting in her half. Had one even say to me "But if you REALLY love me you won't care if I don't try as hard."

A lot of us guys are guarded because we know what our love is worth. Some guys will hesitate to spend any of their romance dollars.

[MaidenMinx]

^^ which bit was creepy?

[Graham Berkeley]

It was all pretty creepy but...

obtain a lock of it's hair. Burn the hair in a dime-store incense burner with yin/yang symbols on three sides. Face southwest. Talk fast over the burning hair in a convincingly exotic language. Use the ashes of the burnt hair to paint a mustache on your face. Find love. Tell it you are someone new. It will stay.

Was the worst part.

I appreciate the message its trying to convey but those lines sound like they are written by an older lady with a bunch of cats who's trying to find inner piece after never having found what she writes about...

[MaidenMinx]

It is also written in humour. I love number 3 personally.

But I will admit I haven't put my favourite spiel from the book about how to make love stay.