date on thursday

[DarkHelmet82]

OK, so ive been talking to a new woman and for some reason I already am doubting myself. Its almost like my self confidence is shot to shit after this last breakup..

any tips on what I can do to regain my confidence to the point where I am not manifesting my selfdoubt on new people?

thank you

[VincenzoG91]

Downplay the importance of this first date. The purpose of a first date isn't too launch a new relationship, it's just to scout out whether there is any compatibility for a potential relationship. Relax and be yourself. If she likes you for who you are, that's great. If not, it wasn't meant to be, and it doesn't mean that there is anything wrong with you.

[DarkHelmet82]

Yeah you are absolutly right.. I guess I just dont know if I am ready yet no matter how much I wanna be.

[Warhawk]

I started talking to this new girl, when I talk to her I forget about my past relationship. She also seems to be interested, but I feel like my past break up is stopping me from progressing our friendship. I think maybe after a bit of time talking to her and others I'll be able to summon the courage to ask her out.

That wasn't really advice for you, but what I have to say is if you like to listen to music, listen to something that pumps you up. Listen to something that inspires you, and lifts you up in excitement. I really like music and how it plays with people's moods and emotions. If I want to party, you listen to something that makes you want to drink. If I want to be cheered up, I normally I'll listen to my favorite bands or try and explore new types of music/bands. Perkele is a working class band that I recently started to listening to and is all about standing up for your self, pride and fight for what you believe in. It really pumps me up!

Try it!

[Renwo]

After a previous break-up (not the heart crushing current one), I also had confidence issues. I read Double Your Dating by David DeAngelo, and it helped out a lot far as confidence was concerned. I might have to reread it when I'm ready to date again.

[DarkHelmet82]

ive heard about him.. isnt his stuff all about just getting laid?

[Renwo]

Not all of it. He has relationship advice too. Like how to get a girlfriend and make her feel crazy about you all the time.

[DarkHelmet82]

Its a website right or is it a book?

[Renwo]

It's a book. You can find the e-book online.

[DannyH]

Seriously don't think of dating as dating. It helps. Dinner is dinner, a movie is a movie, drops the pressure. Dude it's in the bag she already said yes so you pretty much have nothing to worry about the hard part is over.

[DarkHelmet82]

Seriously don't think of dating as dating. It helps. Dinner is dinner, a movie is a movie, drops the pressure. Dude it's in the bag she already said yes so you pretty much have nothing to worry about the hard part is over.

Thanks.. you are right...

its just that my self esteem and ego is real shattered, and what I want to avoid is sabatoging things before they even start... not sure if that makes sense.

[DannyH]

Thanks.. you are right...

its just that my self esteem and ego is real shattered, and what I want to avoid is sabatoging things before they even start... not sure if that makes sense.

I know and it makes perfect sense that is why dropping the pressure is amazing. The whole word date is just a big psyche out. People forget that. Seriously going out and having fun is the main goal right focus on that. Just remember she said yes so you already attracted her attention and she already thinks you got something good to give. I mean come on women don't say yes to guys who they aren't attracted to. Once you drill that in to your head you'll be even more golden.

[DarkHelmet82]

I know and it makes perfect sense that is why dropping the pressure is amazing. The whole word date is just a big psyche out. People forget that. Seriously going out and having fun is the main goal right focus on that. Just remember she said yes so you already attracted her attention and she already thinks you got something good to give. I mean come on women don't say yes to guys who they aren't attracted to. Once you drill that in to your head you'll be even more golden.

Thanks, I need to just be more aloof I think and not worry about things so much

[DannyH]

I'll give you my outlook on emotional stress. Stress isn’t happening to me, it’s a reaction to a situation. It's my choice to be stressed or not. Make it your mantra. Makes the little things like worrying and the junk slide off your back.

[McRich01]

Just clarify you would like to marry her, and you want her to be the mother of your babies, And that you want to spend forever and eternity with her.

Naaah only messing.

Just be yourself, Be confident an believe in you.