Ok so I lived in northern California when I met this girl while I was finishing up my undergrad degree. I stay in Northern California searching for job with no luck and lots of distractions around me. I finally realized that I needed a change in order to progress my life and future. However, moving away met leaving her. However, I never really saw this girl as someone that would be in my life forever and while I loved her at the time I didn't believe I was in love with her. Long story short I ended up moving back down to southern California and we decided to do the long distance thing because we both still cared about each other a lot. However, once I moved down to southern California, like magic, my life and future seemed clearer and on the roll again. Although I promised to make trips up to see her over the summer, my life quickly became swamped with trying to make ends meet and my time all filled up with studying. It didn't seem like I was going to be able to uphold my promise to see her and so I broke up with her. However, once i did this she thought it was because i wanted to see other people which was not the case. I just felt like the relationship was going to be pointless and unfair to throw the responsibility of seeing each other on her. She told me that she didn't think that we could be friends because she felt like I was giving up on our relationship to soon. She felt she should be the judge of whether it is worth it since the responsibility would be on her. At first, I thought to myself I know its hard to end things with a girl you really care about but in the end you never really thought you would be with her forever anyways. So even with her threats of no friendship, we continued talking until one day she told me that she didnt think she could do the friend thing anymore. We stopped talking for a couple days but for some reason her words really did hit me hard and I couldn't get her off my mind. Maybe i did end things to soon? So I called her up and told her I wanted to give it a try again because I was having some doubts. She agree to be with me again and the long distance started all over. However, in about a two weeks she came down to so cal to visit me. Once she was down here I realized how much I really missed her. However, she went back to nor cal and after about two days I could tell she was sad and upset. We talked about it and she told me that she understood why I broke things off with her the first time. The time she spent with me in so cal showed her what my life was like and how little time and money I had( moneys big deal in the sense of buying gas or plane tickets to see her). We then agreed that maybe it was best to end things since it was very unlikely that we would be able to see each other for a really long time( 3 months) and even if i did see her after the 3 months my life was still up in the air. So there was no guarantee that I would eventually be with her again or be able to visit often. However, this time she agreed that a friendship was doable because now she knew for sure that it wasn't because I wanted to see other people but because of those other reasons.

Ok so now that you know the situation here are my problems. I can stand the idea of her being with other people. I still love her and I think I'm in love with her( although i'm not completely sure). I miss her a ton and want to be with her more than ever. I realize that living in southern California has been very beneficial in figuring out what I want career wise and in my life but to a detriment to our relationship. How do I know if she's the girl for me and if its worth all the heartache and pain to go through a long distance relationship with no hope in sight of us being together anytime soon. At times, i think maybe i should just stay friends with her and maybe something will work itself out and we'll be together again when the right circumstances are present(although i know this is a very unlikely solution).I've thought of trying to see other people but i don't see the point, except maybe it would solidify me with answer of whether or not I'm really in love with her. I also feel like it would be hard to date others with her on my mind. I just really confused? Any thoughts will help. Whether its how you know your really in love with someone to maybe its not a hopeful situation and time to move on.