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Thread: She says she doesn't feel my care for her

  1. #1
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    Jul 2011
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    She says she doesn't feel my care for her

    Okay, just signed up for this site, first time poster. But I've sort of got a problem. I'm 21yo, in my first relationship of my life. My gf and I have been going pretty good for about half a year now. Only, she says that sometimes she can't quite feel that I care for her that much. I care about her a lot, but I'm not that great at displaying my emotions. I've always been a pretty introverted guy, and I frequently have a hard time expressing myself. I want to show her, I really do, I guess I just don't know how. Any advice would be appreciated, and let me know if you need any more info on the situation. Thanks.

  2. #2
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    Jan 2011
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    Talk to her about how you feel. Try that she understands that it is really hard for you to express your feelings but you love her a lot anyway.

    That is the point, in my view: she understanding that eve though you don't express your feeling, you feel a lot inside yourself.

    Besides, try to make an effort to say to her the kind of thing that she says to you. When you get used to it, it will be much easier for you, it will be difficult only in the beginning.

    I also used to be very introvert, but I have improved a lot when I have become older. And I improved a lot when I knew some very extrovert people and I imitated them a bit; but be careful, only a bit, don't exaggerate, because the problem for shy people is that when we try to be more extrovert, we usually go to the opposite extreme.

  3. #3
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    I think it's not only what you say, it's also little gestures. the next time you meet her bring her her favourite ice cream or a nice flower. This will show her that you care but without a lot of words.

  4. #4
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    That is the point, in my view: she understanding that eve though you don't express your feeling, you feel a lot inside yourself.
    Exactly. She needs to know you have feelings for you and she needs to hear it every day.

    People show their love in different ways. Some people buy gifts, some people do favors for their loved one like make dinner, some give backrubs, some spend time with their partner. You need to find out what "love language" she is using. Sounds like she likes you to tell her. You're going to have to stretch you limits on this one. She has this need and you have to meet it.
    I have a long time interest in psychology, specializing in relationship dynamics for 30 years.
    (Please note, we give the best advice we can based on the information given in a post. For better advice, please include the age of all romantic partners.)

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