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Thread: Love and Jobs

  1. #1
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    Love and Jobs

    Hi people,

    I'm 25 years old and have been with my bf for just over 2 years. I've half completed a university program, and this year I took some time off of work to find employment and make some money. However, there is huge competition for jobs recently, as I have discovered from potential employers. I have had less than a handful of interviews since January. I am having a very difficult time finding a job, my money that I painstakingly saved up over the years is being spent on the cost of living. It's very stressful - I've been applying for many positions lately, but I'm just having no luck! I have no kids, and I'm having an equally difficult time deciding what I want for a career. I feel so alone, and have become disconnected with many of my friends. I feel guilt, that I should be working harder to find work, but at the end of the day it feels like I'm just running in circles. Sometimes it feels like depression, but I try very hard to keep a positive attitude. My bf makes decent money, but the region we live in is ridiculously expensive. We want to buy a house together someday, and I feel like I just can't get my sh*t together. He works so hard, and is very good at what he does (he's an engineer). I want to be successful like him, but I don't know what steps to take. When I'm not looking for jobs I do everything I can do be successful in other ways. I shower him with love, I keep the home neat and tidy, make his lunches for work, and stay active and busy.

    I'm not really sure what I'm trying to ask.. it would just be nice to know that I'm not the only one in this sort of situation. I'm going to assume that many people might think that this is not a very big problem at all. And it probably isn't. I just feel slightly helpless.

    And I think I feel more guilty because part of me likes this simple life - not having to get up early, being able to cook healthy homemade meals everyday, and not having to deal with a super tight schedule. If I could, I'd just be a homemaker and absolutely love it : /
    Last edited by OoohShiny; 18-07-11 at 05:28 PM.

  2. #2
    Petit Papillon's Avatar
    Petit Papillon is offline Napinacz
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    You could maybe go to some place where they offer advice in preparing for a job interview and how to write your resume and so ... It's normal that you can't find job after graduating,many people have the same problem and just few have the luck to be employed right after university ...You should talk about your fears and feelings to your bf and ask him to be understanding for it. You're simply confused and lost and you just need the right moment, the right opportunity to put steps ahead of you . Everyone gets confused from time to time ,just don't give up , after the rain comes sun ,always
    I wazzzz here


  3. #3
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    if he doesn't complain, why bring it up? some fears need to be kept to yourself.
    mo'Dajvo' pa'wIjDaq je narghpu' He'So'bogh SajlIj

  4. #4
    Petit Papillon's Avatar
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    No, I think it would help her if she would talk about it to someone and well, a bf is a perfect person,as I assume, he's also her best friend right? And in the end it's in their business that she stays happy and find a job, not only her business.
    I wazzzz here


  5. #5
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    I actually went to a employment assistance center in February, where they analysed my personality traits and preferences, and helped with job searching.. and I came out of it even more perplexed and indecisive. It helped a bit, but something is missing. I'm not sure what that is.

    My bf is very understanding and supportive about this. I've talked to him about it many times. It's different though, because I only have a couple of other friends, and I don't know anyone else who is having similar problems. I don't know what I'm doing wrong.
    Last edited by OoohShiny; 19-07-11 at 11:29 AM.

  6. #6
    Petit Papillon's Avatar
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    Maybe you set up your expectations too high, do you believe that you're going to find job without proper experience right away? It happens, but only to those lucky ones... Maybe you should first look for some internship with possibility to get hired there afterwards. Yeah it would mean you work for shitty money (or no money) but you would earn experience and maybe also future job . Did you think about that? It shouldn't be that difficult to find an internship ,there are always some companies that want people to work for them for nothing
    Last edited by Petit Papillon; 19-07-11 at 11:47 AM.
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  7. #7
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    Wow. I'm actually going through something similar. The reason I feel pressure is because my boyfriend asks my long term plans. I'm not sure for career though. As long as he is supportive and understanding (the way you need him to be) then it will work out. Indeed dot com (didn't want to include the link) is great for job searches. Keep at it! As will I!

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    Great site DeFrank, thanks!

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    Time and tide waits for none, career cant wait ..real friends are those which never left you in any situation of life where you need them even you giving them time or not..

  10. #10
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    People all over the world are having a tough time finding jobs. I live in Michigan, which is now the 2nd worst state in the country as far as unemployment goes. We used to be the worst state, then Nevada laid off a bunch of construction workers.

    You are not the only one having problems. You should move somewhere cheaper, but near a good job market. Things are going to get worse before they get better.
    I have a long time interest in psychology, specializing in relationship dynamics for 30 years.
    (Please note, we give the best advice we can based on the information given in a post. For better advice, please include the age of all romantic partners.)

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