I am nearly 40, educated, experienced (in things that dont seem to matter nowadays anyway), attractive and quick to solve problems. Ex-Bering Sea fisherman and 13 years in the Death business, the investigator part of myself has turned those specs inward as a current relationship has, through my observations, brought out within me my emotional weaknesses, nearly drowned my self-confidence, caused severe distrust, and guided me into a position where I am more of a useful tool than a boyfriend.

I intended to help a young mother solve her issues at hand and in the course I allowed myself to be used as a supporter, maid, driver, step-father, coat rack for bogus (but never provable) manipulation, annoyance and rescuer when necessary. I have never felt so unsure about my ability in a relationship, my ability to believe or question, my quality of self-respect and my solid understanding of my emotional / sexual position in a relationship.

I have given up on trying to step my way through this and need some advice or wisdom or confirmation or a wake-up. I am a very capable and resourceful man, have been with many women but never held a relationship for any worthy amount of time. I have continued to give the benefit of the doubt but I want to know if my circumstance is of my own doing or am I just a glutton and am too weak to make a change.

Can someone please educate me?