i want to send this letter to her mom

[Wakeup]

I think you should take it to your shrink and let him analyse You.

Newsflash: Mom won't give a shit whats going on in that mind of yours.

[tremolo]

My idiot ex sent letters to my mother in effort to get to me... Don't do it. It just made him look lame and creepy - and he was the one who broke it off.

So yeah... just don't.

[jer1023]

Newsflash: Maybe I do need a shrink.

This girl begged for an open relationship rather than the committed relationship I wanted, and then left me over me kissing a girl.
Because I kissed a girl, she decided to break my heart by choosing not to see me after I flew to Miami to see her.
I finally moved on after 3 weeks in a depression, and the day I arrive in Israel, 3000 miles away, she tells me she made a mistake and we get back together.
I fly home again, cutting my travels short 4 months, sacrificing my volunteer project in Nepal to see this woman, and 8 days before I get home, she tells me not to come and she has met someone new.


With all due respect, Wakeup, this forum is to help others get better. Not to belittle them. I am a normal guy, but I have been mentally destroyed by what this girl has done to me. It is not normal and besides adultry , death, and physical assault, is probably more traumatic than any story on this website.

[MaidenMinx]

And what wakeup was trying to say, I assume, is, rather than try to drag her mother into the middle of it (looking rather insane all the while) go get yourself some help. You've had your heartbroken and you are grieving. Deal with it appropriately. Writing to her mother is hardly appropriate. The only time any person should talk to their partners parents about them is to plan a party or a gift. It should never be to try to manipulate someone into being with you again... and that's the whole aim isn't it? Hoping her mother will think you are a sweetheart and encourage her daughter to be with you again?

Back off, grow up and get some help.

Oh and if you keep trying to defend yourself people will start telling you you only posted here to hear what you want to hear, so before that starts, let me tell you now NO ONE IS GOING TO SERIOUSLY SUPPORT YOU SENDING THIS LETTER.

[surfhb]

Congrats! You get the "Im the Biggest ****kkin Idiot" Award for 2011

Either that or youre a troll with alot of fucckkin time on his hands. Dude! You think youre the only one here whos lost a girl of their dreams? Weve all been through this Bullshiit! Deal with it like any other break up... it takes time!

[IndiReloaded]

LOL! I hope you are joking. But, just in case not: NO, do not send this letter to her mom.

[Dank]

Maybe if you read the letter, you'd see why I am such a mess. I am desperate. She has changed her phone number and deleted facebook. I am going insane. She hurt me terribly on two seperate occasions yet I still love her and feel like messaging her mom is my only outlet.

Slap your self... her mom is going to do the same thing as her daughter and there are many ladies out there go find one and move on . Goodluck!

[Wakeup]

I fly home again, cutting my travels short 4 months, sacrificing my volunteer project in Nepal to see this woman,

Wow! All that for someone who wouldn't even commit to being exclusive with you. This is why I recommend you discuss this whole thing with a therapist rather than your exes mother. A therapist would be more helpful to YOU in the long run. You see, most people with a tad of self-respect and those who valued themselves would not sacrifice very much for someone who wouldn't commit to them. Certainly not their "volunteer project in Nepal" by any means.

I am a normal guy, but I have been mentally destroyed by what this girl has done to me.

You mean what you did to yourself when you accepted being her whistle boy. She whistled for you and no matter how unreasonable you accomodated her bizzare and disrespectful behaviour and treatment of you. That's what you need to be addressing... your inability to say no to her (and likely anyone), your obession with her because she wouldn't commit and why you feel the need to write her mother about your entire relationship from the time you met until it ended for good.. Anyone in their right emotional mind would know that doing something like that would be totally inappropriate and they would know it without asking a forum full of strangers if they thought it was a good idea.

If you feel you're "mentally destroyed" then by all means, get some professional help to overcome.

[jer1023]

I really didn't create this thread for your entertainment or to elicit sarcasm. if you read the letter perhaps you could fathom the pain I am in. I suppose I have an obsessive predisposition or I am not grown up enough to allow this to 'take time', because I have been reliving the events every single second for the past month of my life. I fking hate this. I have insulted her teeth and her body, as a reaction to her stringing me on and breaking my heart twice for a week to go, and for her telling me she could never 'settle' on me.

I am a god damn mess. She has changed her phone number, deactivated facebook, and taken a leave of absence from work. She is starving herself currently and I am very concerned that she has not answered in 3 days. I moved back in with my parents and have not been able to compose myself enough to get through a job interview. The sole reason I was sending her mom the message is in hopes she could talk to her daughter, who was physically assaulted in two sepreate relationships before me, and tell her that just because a man has an angry reaction via text to a girl breaking his heart, does not mean he will physically assault them.

I am not going to send the letter after hearing what you guys have to say, but I was going to. Simply because I am a helpless nutjob right now and my world is falling apart on me.

[jer1023]

Wow! All that for someone who wouldn't even commit to being exclusive with you. This is why I recommend you discuss this whole thing with a therapist rather than your exes mother. A therapist would be more helpful to YOU in the long run. You see, most people with a tad of self-respect and those who valued themselves would not sacrifice very much for someone who wouldn't commit to them. Certainly not their "volunteer project in Nepal" by any means.

Hey man, F*CK you. Seriously. Go F*CK yourself. I loved this girl, and she strung me on for an additional 5 months leading me to believe she felt the same. It wasn't her refusing to be exclusive with me, it was her not wanting to break my heart by having me move cross country after her. She came to this realization after I shortened my trip and waited a week before I got to Arizona to dumbfound me with this news. If you are going to make an ignorant assh*le comment, at least read what I wrote first. Stay out of my business if you are gonna be a fick about it.

[Dank]

Dude don't come on this forum seeking for help then going rage on members ..... sorry but i see why she has left you fix the F up! only the truth has been spoken

AND MOVE ON SHES DOESN'T LOVE YOU ! enough said.

Stay out of my business? you fricking posted the god dam situation on a forum wtf?

[smackie9]

Newsflash: Maybe I do need a shrink.

This girl begged for an open relationship rather than the committed relationship I wanted, and then left me over me kissing a girl.
Because I kissed a girl, she decided to break my heart by choosing not to see me after I flew to Miami to see her.
I finally moved on after 3 weeks in a depression, and the day I arrive in Israel, 3000 miles away, she tells me she made a mistake and we get back together.
I fly home again, cutting my travels short 4 months, sacrificing my volunteer project in Nepal to see this woman, and 8 days before I get home, she tells me not to come and she has met someone new.


With all due respect, Wakeup, this forum is to help others get better. Not to belittle them. I am a normal guy, but I have been mentally destroyed by what this girl has done to me. It is not normal and besides adultry , death, and physical assault, is probably more traumatic than any story on this website.

Traumatic? This wasn't a true relationship. It was a mess of manipulation, false hopes and fake promises.....you should have seen through the BS she was putting out. You are a very confused person. Relax about the letter, lick your wounds, learn your lesson and move on.....the healthiest thing you can do is put this behind you as quickly as possible.

[jer1023]

I signed up for this website a suicidal mess hoping for some help. Thanks guys, peace

[MaidenMinx]

Good to hear you have come to your senses.

No one hear was trying to belittle your situation. All everyone was trying to tell you was that the letter is a really bad idea. Surely your mates were telling you the same thing. Or didn't you bring it up with them.

When it comes to being helped through heartbreak, this forum can be a great place. If your OP had been more of a 'she treated me like shit. how do I get over her' all the responses would have been different, though I assure therapy would have been recommended. Not because anyone really thinks you are insane, but because therapists are trained to help with grief. We're not.

And yes, some of us were harsh. Some people need harsh. It's like slapping an hysterical woman, you needed to be snapped out of the 'maybe her mum can help' thought process. We (well I) don't mean to be mean, it's just necessary sometimes.

[lahnnabell]

OP, stop getting pissy. Notice how NO ONE is supporting your reasons for sending this letter because you're lying to yourself about why you want to send it. You need the help of a therapist who can really begin to pull apart the emotional trauma you've been through and address the issues. This letter will not bring your ex back to you. If she flaked on you for such a stupid reason, then she clearly won't be swayed by such a letter. Please, start being honest with yourself. Or don't. We're trying to help you see the truth of the matter here.