Ladies... when you email your ex, are you reaching out, or just doing business?

[Dolmetscher]

I haven't heard a word from my ex after we broke up 3 1/2 months ago. The details of our break up are long and anti-climactic. But basically, she got into some very very serious financial troubles, that caused her to basically implode. I stayed with her for 2 months of trying to get her to answer the phone, call me, text me, whatever... but she just pulled back more and more until I wasn't hearing from her for days, and then a week etc. So I finally just called it dead in the water. It was a horrible thing, because I broke up with her, even though I didn't want to AT ALL. I was just being treated like such an after thought, and that can't stand.

So after 3 1/2 months of not hearing a word from her, I finally decided that I had to try to really completely move on, so I de-friended her from Facebook, took her out of my phone, and swallowed hard, but it is what it is. Well 4 days after I de-friended her, she emailed me. It wasn't a "Let's get together" email. It was more "professional".

She said that she has a friend who is interested in investing in a restaurant, and she wanted to know if she could pass on my information to this friend. I studied culinary in Europe for 6 years. And she went on to say that she has some of my things in storage and that I have some of her things, and that maybe we should arrange to exchange them.

So ladies... after hearing all that, my thoughts are, why would she contact me after 3 1/2 months of silence, right after I de-friend her on FB, and tell me that she has a friend that wants to meet about a restaurant? I'm thinking that she is reaching out, and wants to talk, and see how things are between us. But I think that men sometimes have a hard time imagining that other people aren't necessarily thinking the same thing we are. I basically WANT her to be reaching out, but I have no way of knowing.

I am not interested in working with "her friends" at all. I have a great job. And the things that she has of mine, she could throw in the river for all I care. I just cannot help but feel in my heart, that she wants to see me. What do you think ladies? Am I just being a dumb "dude", or does this sound kinda like something you might do in her situation? Please really ask yourself that. Don't just reply with the first thought that you have.

[devonbrown]

Dude, as a fellow guy, I have to say that you are definitely fooling yourself. She bailed out of the relationship long before you did. Either message her back with "Don't pass my information on to anyone and you can throw my stuff away." or don't respond at all. You are just asking for yourself to deal with the emotional ramifications of the break up all over again.