Transparency

[colinico]

What do you consider to be transparency with your partner? Do you apply it in your relationship(s)?

ej.do you take a moment to say to her that your eyes wondered in that girls behind or bust? or fantasy sexual dream with a women thats not your partner? do you tell her if a girl hits on you? do you tell her you hit on her back or that you dindt but it was hard not to do it because she was attractive? Do you tell you saw porn(while being with her)? Do you watch it ith her by your side

[Borealis]

Whether intimate or regular relationships there is no reason you should even care about these things. Its nonsense. If he isn't cheating then let him go ahead and do this looking around. Stop feeling insecure and it'll work out.

[colinico]

This things lead to cheating, they are the start of it. Ignoring it is like saying, let the infidelity happen. Communication is the key aspect.

[surfhb]

What do you consider to be transparency with your partner? Do you apply it in your relationship(s)?

ej.do you take a moment to say to her that your eyes wondered in that girls behind or bust? or fantasy sexual dream with a women thats not your partner? do you tell her if a girl hits on you? do you tell her you hit on her back or that you dindt but it was hard not to do it because she was attractive? Do you tell you saw porn(while being with her)? Do you watch it ith her by your side

Oh yeah....thats a definite way to build a strong relationship! Why would you ask such a dumb question?

[smackie9]

This things lead to cheating, they are the start of it. Ignoring it is like saying, let the infidelity happen. Communication is the key aspect.

On the contrary, these things don't always lead to cheating. Lack of sex can, neglect, failed relationship and too spineless to end it, revenge, personality trait, insecurity,and poor judgement are just a few. Watching porn and checking out someones boobs doesn't lead to cheating. Its a fact men just look out of instinct, its how they are wired. Porn is not emotional to men, its just stimuli. Fantasizing about other people, everybody does that.What happens in one's head is nobody's business. The only truth in your statement is hitting on someone....you are showing interest verbally, that is cheating.

[colinico]

if its such a dumb question why did I get the first reply
"Whether intimate or regular relationships there is no reason you should even care about these things. Its nonsense. If he isn't cheating then let him go ahead and do this looking around. Stop feeling insecure and it'll work out."
If it's such a dumb question why do most of the people, atleast a 78%, dont work their relationship this way? Why are there so much divorce cases or infidelities?

*How as it helped YOU, being this way in a relationship? surfhb

[colinico]

true, it is animal instict even for female, but it is more likely to lead to infidelity if you dont communicate that desire to your partner than if you say it openly to them. Im talking about transparency and communication. Im not saying dont do it, im saying or asking if you communicate that to your partner and what difference do you see when you do it.

[smackie9]

Expressing your desires for others only causes aggravation and unnecessary jealousy.......

[smackie9]

if its such a dumb question why did I get the first reply
"Whether intimate or regular relationships there is no reason you should even care about these things. Its nonsense. If he isn't cheating then let him go ahead and do this looking around. Stop feeling insecure and it'll work out."
If it's such a dumb question why do most of the people, atleast a 78%, dont work their relationship this way? Why are there so much divorce cases or infidelities?

*How as it helped YOU, being this way in a relationship? surfhb

Because people don't know what it takes to keep a marriage together. Lack of comparability, money issues, drug and alcohol abuse, mental abuse, neglect, mental illness stresses of having children, lose of intimacy, etc can cause divorce. Not all divorces end because of infidelity. That's just plain stupid.

[smackie9]

What do you think would happen if you turned to your pregnant wife and said "I find your sister very sexually desirable, in fact I imagine having sex with her", but knowing you would never consider ever acting upon this, what do you think would happen next? Your clothing would be on the front lawn on fire and her on the phone asking her father for a recommendation of a good lawyer.

[smackie9]

As the saying goes some things are best not being said.

[smackie9]

Oh now it all makes sense...your a female.....hun you have so much to learn. There was no way for you to prevent your BF from cheating on you whether he told you about his desires or not.

[colinico]

Better to say, they are things best said at its appropiate moment.
I didnt say all divorces end because of that, but the questions i posted revolve around infidelity and lack of communicating in specific. Im not generalizing I specified what i was talking about.

[surfhb]

I mean its just common sense. I find many women attractive during my daily routine. I dont go home and tell my girlfriend about them.

[Borealis]

colinico you're a control freak. If you want to know everything on his mind it's going to destitute the relationship before it even begins. Instead of trying to control him why don't you just treat him good and stop nagging him? I assume you want to talk about these stupid and trivial things which would only push any right thinking man away.