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Thread: Is this nothing or something?

  1. #46
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    Quote Originally Posted by IndiReloaded View Post
    Wrong. Again, it doesn't matter. Must be my online accent making this point difficult to understand:

    She's not obligated to explain anything about behaviour that is unacceptable. She's not his mother, nor wife, or even his GF. Her obligation is only to recognize his bad behaviour (or lack of good behaviour in this case) and make the choice for herself that she isn't interested in a guy that doesn't get it.

    If he is going to modify his own good manners to suit a girl b/c thinks she 'doesn't like being contacted often', then he's a fool. But I doubt that is the case, and I think you are given him credit where none is due. People of good taste know better than to do what he did. He should be lucky she even pointed it out to him, so he can mbe avoid it with the next girl. There are many people (myself included) who would have simply ignored his call and never contacted him again.
    I am not saying that he is like this for certain, just that since the OP doesn't know and she seemed quite into him, she should've at least tried to find out for sure whether he's a jerk or he's just a bit dumb when it comes to understanding women. Then again maybe that itself is a negative trait for the OP and she can't stand men who don't understand women so then no point in calling at all, one way or the other.

    If he was used to not contacting her between dates, how could he have known that she expected him to contact her this time? It's bad manners ok, but what IF he really thought she wouldn't have liked it, as unlikely as it seems.

    And of course she's not obligated: it's just something that I would do if I was into someone (I'd do it for ME). I'd make sure I know whether he's treated me wrong or we just didn't understand each other, before making a decision about him.

    Anyway it doesn't matter, seems like the OP wasn't so much into the guy as it looked like.

    OP: if he does contact you again, please make sure you make the communication issue very clear (I mean, talk about it explicitly).

  2. #47
    IndiReloaded's Avatar
    IndiReloaded is offline Yawning
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    Bah, only women with poor self-esteem keep hoping a guy like this will call them back. There are so many decent, intelligent guys out there (all you 'nice' guys) but most women waste their time trying to repair the assholes. Oh well, more for women like me, I guess.
    Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
    --Cyteen by C.J.Cherryh

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