Why have 15+ women I've dated all end up with ASSHOLES?

[Mr_Sensitive]

Like seriously. Why can't I find someone who appreciates me for who I am? Why should I have to change myself into something I DON"T want to be (i.e. a loser that treats his women like shit, calls them fat, tells them that they will never see him again, etc.)

I mean, I understand, girls like it rough in the bedroom. But I mean, there are a LOT of different girls in the world, right? There seriously HAS to be a few girls that enjoy a sweet guy now and then, right? So far, no. I am sick of girls always telling me to be "myself" when "myself" always gets the big shaft. I'm never good enough. So many sad, lonely nights balling my eyes out. I mean I know I am a cute enough guy and I have my fair share of casual sex, but what part of a sweet guy turns girls off so much?

I am SICK of being lied to SICK of not being good enough SICK of my feelings meaning absolutely NOTHING!!!

[Lillypond]

Likes will attract likes. Unfortunately not many nice girls around. You can either be "bad" or be bad sometimes to attract the bad girls or the average girls. Or, wait patiently for a nice girl to come along.

[Mr_Sensitive]

Likes will attract likes. Unfortunately not many nice girls around. You can either be "bad" or be bad sometimes to attract the bad girls or the average girls. Or, wait patiently for a nice girl to come along.

Yeah but I mean there has to be a statistic for the good/bad girl ratio. You would think that the more girls I dated the higher the probability would be that I would bump into a nice one!

[Lillypond]

Yeah but I mean there has to be a statistic for the good/bad girl ratio. You would think that the more girls I dated the higher the probability would be that I would bump into a nice one!

How old are you? If you are young, it is likely because most girls your age haven't matured yet.

[Wakeup]

Yeah but I mean there has to be a statistic for the good/bad girl ratio. You would think that the more girls I dated the higher the probability would be that I would bump into a nice one!

Why do you date them if they are'nt nice? You sound issued.

[Mr_Sensitive]

Why do you date them if they are'nt nice? You sound issued.

I can't know if they are good or bad until I have dated them first! Duh!

[maxmax]

How do you know these 15+ women have all ended up with assholes? Did you vet them? Do a full check on them? Speak to their friends, families, work colleagues and get a full personality evaluation?

Also, if all these women are rejecting you, then maybe the problem is with you and your approach to women. Did you think of that?

We can all complain when things don't go right, but there's no use in being a baby about it.

Take an honest look at the way you approach dating, women, and your whole attitude, and then ask yourself whether there are any glaring flaws that need changing.

[Wakeup]

I can't know if they are good or bad until I have dated them first! Duh!

Yea and as soon as you find they're not nice then YOU should be the one breaking up with them not the other way around. . . Yep issued.

[Mr_Sensitive]

How old are you? If you are young, it is likely because most girls your age haven't matured yet.

I am 21. I think you might be getting somewhere. I have found myself attracted to older girls (i.e. 25-27-ish) but they aren't attracted to me as much because older women tend to want someone financially stable, raise the kids, get insecure about me cheating b/c im young, etc.

This brings me to the conclusion that I should just go out and party for a few more years. Maybe I am just more mature mentally/emotionally than the women I date.

[Lillypond]

How do you know these 15+ women have all ended up with assholes? Did you vet them? Do a full check on them? Speak to their friends, families, work colleagues and get a full personality evaluation?

Also, if all these women are rejecting you, then maybe the problem is with you and your approach to women. Did you think of that?

We can all complain when things don't go right, but there's no use in being a baby about it.

Take an honest look at the way you approach dating, women, and your whole attitude, and then ask yourself whether there are any glaring flaws that need changing.

Totally agree. I hear guys talking about how they can't find nice girls because they are nice guys. But in fact, they have glaring flaws elsewhere (they don't take care of their looks, have no ambitions, lazy, no confidence, etc). They blame it all on being a "nice guy". Guys love to call other guys who were able to woo their girls away as "assholes".

[Mr_Sensitive]

Yea and as soon as you find they're not nice then YOU should be the one breaking up with them not the other way around. . . Yep issued.

Like seriously. Why can't I find someone who appreciates me for who I am? Why should I have to change myself into something I DON"T want to be (i.e. a loser that treats his women like shit, calls them fat, tells them that they will never see him again, etc.)

I mean, I understand, girls like it rough in the bedroom. But I mean, there are a LOT of different girls in the world, right? There seriously HAS to be a few girls that enjoy a sweet guy now and then, right? So far, no. I am sick of girls always telling me to be "myself" when "myself" always gets the big shaft. I'm never good enough. So many sad, lonely nights balling my eyes out. I mean I know I am a cute enough guy and I have my fair share of casual sex, but what part of a sweet guy turns girls off so much?

I am SICK of being lied to SICK of not being good enough SICK of my feelings meaning absolutely NOTHING!!!

Read both. Where in the hell do I say THEY brake up with ME????

[Mr_Sensitive]

Totally agree. I hear guys talking about how they can't find nice girls because they are nice guys. But in fact, they have glaring flaws elsewhere (they don't take care of their looks, have no ambitions, lazy, no confidence, etc). They blame it all on being a "nice guy". Guys love to call other guys who were able to woo their girls away as "assholes".

Ok. I take care of my looks. Check. I am in college for psychiatric nursing. Ambitions? Check. I work 3 jobs. Motivated. Check. I do disagree with you on the confidence area, because to an extent being shy is a personality trait that SHOULD be acceptable. But seriously, keep them coming...



Oh and when I say "ass hole" I am referring to someone that beats women, steals from them, cheats...
There are a few nice guys that come around wanting to hook up with my dates, but in the end, my ex's NEVER end up getting with someone nice!

And besides, why should I have to be PERFECT in every way just to find love? Wow.

[maxmax]

Read both. Where in the hell do I say THEY brake up with ME????

What does it matter who is breaking up with who?

You clearly said that is THEY who do not appreciate you or your company.

This has already been discussed in the other thread; being 'nice' is subjective.

Being nice on it's own is not enough. You have to be someone who is also interesting, good company, attractive and compatible to/with the other person in question.

[Lillypond]

Ok. I take care of my looks. Check. I am in college for psychiatric nursing. Ambitions? Check. I work 3 jobs. Motivated. Check. I do disagree with you on the confidence area, because to an extent being shy is a personality trait that SHOULD be acceptable. But seriously, keep them coming...

Post a picture.

Also, maybe its personality. Have a female friend evaluate you. Subjective evaluation isn't accurate.

[sljohnst]

The phrase "nice guys finish last" comes from somewhere. I dated a guy who was perfect on paper - very sweet, nice, good looking, motivated, good job, similar goals, etc. He would do anything for me. But he became a bit of a doormat, and let me walk all over him, and I lost respect for him, and it ended. It's not that girls want an asshole, we just need someone who will be nice to us but also stand up to us once in a while.