Little background:
As a child, I was a short and overweight; other kids used to laugh and bully me a lot. I was too scary to face reality so I ran away into the world of imagination. Later on, those naïve fantasies became a “dissociation disorder”. Right now, I am no longer short or overweight: I am average height (170 cm) and I have an athletic body shape (working out for the past few years). Nevertheless, the dissociation is still present. I have a hard time experiencing emotions, especially the strong ones.
The "plot":
I had few very short relationships, which ended as the girls realized my disability to feel anything toward them. Recently, I somehow found the ability to feel again. However, if you had paralyzed for years, you have to learn to walk from scratch. The same goes with emotions. I can learn how t love, but I need a girl to “practice on her”. However, nobody believes me, and I cannot blame them for that… I just wonder… Is there is a way to explain that I am not a liar or a freak?
p.s. please excuse my bad English – I do not live in a anglophone country. :-)
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Thread: Learning to love
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05-09-11, 09:26 AM #1
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Learning to love
Last edited by Water Lilly; 09-09-11 at 06:45 AM.
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05-09-11, 10:46 AM #2
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I'm sorry but I didn't understand that part?!
Originally Posted by Water Lilly
"It's all George's fault. All that talk about impotence. He got to me. And that orgasm stuff: orgasm this and orgasm that. It's a lot of pressure!" Jerry Seinfeld
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05-09-11, 11:10 AM #3
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You need to get out with a few trusted friends and go to some social events and interact with girls randomly. Socializing builds confidence. Dear you have anxiety....you fear showing your feelings, you can't trust, and this wall you have built is there to protect but its a hindrance. There are no guarantees in life, you have to roll with the punches....meaning just let things happen. The more you interact with people, the more you will overcome your issues.Just relax and enjoy life.
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09-09-11, 06:51 AM #4
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Oops, forgot the word "need": I need a girl to "practice on her". Originally Posted by vampiress
When I go out and socialize, I am mostly "dissociating"; thus, people usually mistake me for an extravertSocializing builds confidence.
I have no idea how to turn this off and stay integrated even when people are present.
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09-09-11, 07:46 AM #5
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Practice loving her or practice sex or what? What do you mean you have to practice on a girl? You either have feelings for a girl or you dont. No one believes you about what? Are you male or female?
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09-09-11, 08:11 AM #6
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I don't think that "Practicing on a girl" would be a good idea.... People's feelings are not some sort of an experimental project ...
"It's all George's fault. All that talk about impotence. He got to me. And that orgasm stuff: orgasm this and orgasm that. It's a lot of pressure!" Jerry Seinfeld
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09-09-11, 03:15 PM #7
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You may be gay.
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