She went through a bad breakup..

[AlexD]

Hello, so lately I've been talking to a wonderful sweetheart girl. She's probably my dream girl to be honest. There's only one thing about our whole situation that's kinda messed up. She went through a really bad break up about half a year ago.

She was in a relationship with a guy for 5 years and they were going to get married, but it turned out he was cheating on her so they ended the relationship and never got married.

This girl tells me she really likes me a lot, she even shows me this when we're together. But every now and then she'll flake on me for a few days, I'll ask her what's on her mind and she just tells me she's afraid that I'm going to hurt her. She says I sort of give off a player vibe and stuff. (Which I'm not, but I do have a way with girls and have no problem on dates)

I said to her "Well it seems to me like you really want our relationship to move forward, but you feel insecure about us being together. I just want you to know I like you a lot and if I didn't I wouldn't try to keep this going." She agreed with what I said.

Now I'm just thinking maybe I'll give this a break for a few days and wait for her to contact me, but I don't want her to think I'm trying to get rid of her. We have plans scheduled to go out tomorrow night, but I'm almost 100% certain she's going to flake.

What do you ladies suggest?

-AlexD

[Enigmos]

AlexD, ask yourself if you feel she is worth fighting for. If she is, muster up all the patience you can have for her. Women, and men, who have felt betrayal in a most intimate way will typically be gun shy to try again. (Typing from experience, in a most humiliating way.)

Good luck.

[Achilles]

To me it just sounds as though she is very scared because of what happened to her. Personally I think it's going to take her a lot longer to trust you/someone than it would normally because of her fears of being hurt, so you just have to work at it and give her the help, support and patience she needs. Rather than 'leaving her to it' to get back to you, be understanding. When you say flakey, is she rude about it? If not then just be as caring as you can...It'll take a while for her to trust again.