Should I pm him on facebook...

[Fairydust]

Right....there is a guy I work with that I have been flirting with, I get the impression he fancies me from his body language around me and little things he does with me that he doesn't do to every other girl at work (as far as I am aware). We had an extremely flirty conversation last week that turned slightly sexual in a jokey manner and the next time he saw me he was like "hellooooooo" in that really flirty way as he walked past. Anyway I have heard on the grape vine that he has a long term gf but I have never asked him outright if he is single and he has never informed me that he has a girlfriend. Our relationship is purely flirty rather than deep and meaningful conversations...

Anyway, I am off work for a couple of weeks now and am wondering if I should private message him on facebook with some flirty banter following on from the last conversation and see what he says....however as we are not friends on facebook and we work together I am wondering if this would be inappropriate?

Would you be happy to receive a random facebook pm from a girl you have seemingly been flirting with or would you think they were a bit odd...

I am very aware of the fact that I see him every day at work and am worried about making things weird if I have read the signals wrong...

[smackie9]

If he does have a GF....how would you like it if a girl was adding your BF that you didn't know about. Do you want to cause trouble in someone else relationship? People flirt at work all the time. I wouldn't take it too seriously....he maybe doing it for his own entertainment and nothing more.

[AnnaLucia]

I think it is not appropriate thing to do if he has a girlfriend.
smakie9 is right you shouldn't cause trouble in someone else relationship.

[Fairydust]

He told one of my good friends that his relationship was "off again" a few weeks ago which is why I believe he is now single.

Anyway, you are right - if he has a gf I do not plan on getting in the middle so I will simply find out if he is single for sure I think.

But - if I discover he is definitely single do you think the facebook thing would be a bit weird?

[Wakeup]

Right....there is a guy I work with that I have been flirting with, I get the impression he fancies me from his body language around me and little things he does with me that he doesn't do to every other girl at work (as far as I am aware). We had an extremely flirty conversation last week that turned slightly sexual in a jokey manner and the next time he saw me he was like "hellooooooo" in that really flirty way as he walked past. Anyway I have heard on the grape vine that he has a long term gf but I have never asked him outright if he is single and he has never informed me that he has a girlfriend. Our relationship is purely flirty rather than deep and meaningful conversations...

Anyway, I am off work for a couple of weeks now and am wondering if I should private message him on facebook with some flirty banter following on from the last conversation and see what he says....however as we are not friends on facebook and we work together I am wondering if this would be inappropriate?

Would you be happy to receive a random facebook pm from a girl you have seemingly been flirting with or would you think they were a bit odd...

I am very aware of the fact that I see him every day at work and am worried about making things weird if I have read the signals wrong...

You heard it through the grapevine that he has a girlfriend but instead of inquiring with him about that you want to ignore it like it doesn't exist and persue him anyway? Is that what you're saying?

He told one of my good friends that his relationship was "off again" a few weeks ago which is why I believe he is now single.

"Off again" are the key words that you need to pay attentiion to. This man is not finished with this girl. He is still very much attached to her if they have history of being on again and off again. You'd be wise to stay away from him unless and until he contacts you or makes some kind of move on you becuase he will likely take anything you offer him without committing and then dump you once he wants to be on again with this woman. You don't want to be a rebound and flirting with you is not a sign of anything when a guy is already attached. It could just be is normal demenour and personality.

You also don't want to be the pursuer here as I said.. he will take advantage of the fact that you are easily persuaded. I say that because you're considering chasing a guy just because he flirts with you. Be a little more discerning and make sure you're investing in someone who will give you back some kind of emotional return on your investment. He's no where near being ready for anything serious. You're not the type to just want casual sex. If you were you'd be doing what it takes to get screwed without worrying about asking advice from a board full of strangers as to what you should and shouldn't do.

[Fairydust]

I already realised messaging him was a terrible idea but thanks Wakeup, you have a point.

[Illusional]

i would if i were you, what have you got to loose?

raverboy

[Illusional]

I already realised messaging him was a terrible idea but thanks Wakeup, you have a point.

oh well...f*ck it ah? at least you tried and now you can stop worrying about it.


raverboy

[Fairydust]

Lol, people with high moral standards always rain on my parade until I feel guilty

[smackie9]

When he is free and clear I'm sure you will be the first he asks out. Sometimes it's better to be "untouchable" rather than chase......makes you more desireable.

[Belle13]

Start knowing him more than flirting with him. Like talk to him as if you are his closest friend. When the time comes that he is comfortable on talking to you and you really prove that he has no GF..that will be time to flirt with him