Men...please answer some questions for me.

[Lonely in PA]

When you end a relationship, do you cut all ties and have no further contact? Especially if you already moved on to another relationship? Why would you care how your ex is if you have truly moved on? What would make you call her number from a restricted number??? Just to hear her voice? Why???? If it's over???? How would you feel if your ex never responded to any of your texts for a month and a half? Why would you count the number of days it's been since she moved out (u told her to leave) and then tell her in a text how many days it's been... soooooooo confused!!!! Miss him so much and hate reading into things, so I thought i'd ask you why you would do any of the above questions. Thanks for answering!!!!

[James Banes]

When you end a relationship, do you cut all ties and have no further contact? Especially if you already moved on to another relationship? Why would you care how your ex is if you have truly moved on?

I don't cut ties as in "It's done. I don't want to see her anymore or know she even exists." I have non further contact because we are no longer dating. Just because I moved on from my ex doesn't mean I don't care about her. In many cases, a guy who breaks up with his ex still cares about her but just doesn't see her as relationship material.

What would make you call her number from a restricted number??? Just to hear her voice? Why???? If it's over????

If he called you from a restricted number, he did it because you thought he wouldn't answer if you saw his number.

How would you feel if your ex never responded to any of your texts for a month and a half?

I'd feel it was over.

Why would you count the number of days it's been since she moved out (u told her to leave) and then tell her in a text how many days it's been... soooooooo confused!!!! Miss him so much and hate reading into things, so I thought i'd ask you why you would do any of the above questions. Thanks for answering!!!!

You are reading way too into things. A guy breaking up with you doesn't mean he doesn't care about you. He still wants to know you're okay, but he doesn't want to get back into the relationship. It seems like your guy wants to be an acquaintance but not a lover. You're making it difficult for him by reading too into things and wanting to get back into the relationship.

[searock]

I think you should make it clear to him that you do not want to be contacted anymore, because it only hurts you to know that even if he still cares for you, he just won't be with you again. Be very clear, and don't reply again until you have moved on.

[Lonely in PA]

James, I am a bit confused by your first response. See, we are broken up and he has moved on to another relationship, but still contacting me. Why??? The information he is telling me about is completely irrelevant to me as we are NO LONGER DATING!!! As for his text last week telling me how many days its been...is that something you would be counting? Is that normal for a guy to count the days since his ex moved out and then goes on to tell her he knows/remembers how many days its been. WHY???? Sorry if you feel I'm reading into his text, that is why I'm asking MEN how they feel/think. I have asked MANY MEN if they counted the days when their ex's moved out and the resounding answer I got was ABSOLUTELY NOT!!!! I am not making anything difficult for him, because I have not responded to his texts or asked him why he said what he said, I'm asking you MEN on here. I have blocked him from any further contact. It just hurts so bad because we were together on and off for 8 and 1/2 years. He also said he was going to send me a message on facebook, but when he searched, he saw that I was no longer on there. That too made me think he was curious to know what I was up to and wondered why I was no longer on there. My question again is, if he has moved on and is content and happy in his new relationship, then why look me up? Trust me, I am curious to know what he is up to have wanted to talk to him every day since I left, but I NEVER made contact with him, either through texts, fb, etc. I just keep hoping that he realizes that the grass is NOT greener, especially with someone so much younger with a young child.

Searock, thanks for responding...I had his number blocked so he has had no further contact with me.

[smackie9]

I say you are right that he does miss you and this other relationship has probably less than ideal BUT!, if he was seriously considering getting back with you, he would have ended this relationship he is in now, and would come right out and ask to meet up for coffee and talk. He never has, and never will. These texts you are getting are probably drunk ones, or after they had a fight. He was probably hoping he could still use you for emotional support and nothing more. Kinda selfish, but I feel it goes to show you what kind of jerk he really was and still is.

[Wakeup]

I'm wondering why you haven't blocked and deleted him so he can't continue to confuse you and keep you lonely and stagnated in your longing for him? He's in another relationship and you allow him to torture you. Why? Quit letting him play with your mind and accept that it's over and you'll not have to make threads like this because you'll have given yourself a chance to heal by using the NC method of withdrawl from him. How do you expect to quit smoking if you keep having a cigarette certainly applies here. Cold turkey rehab from him and quit the wondering, guessing, and wishing.

[bulrush]

Generally I cut all ties and don't contact her again. But sometimes I do stay friends with her, and I might email her once a month just to say "hi", but that's about it. I don't pine over old girlfriends.