Need outsiders advice!!!

**Jasmine1987** · 24-09-11, 11:50 AM

I need an outsider advice on my situation, I just don't know what to think and I want an unbiased opinion!

So I broke up with my bf about a month ago, he was financially unstable and I just had a hard time trusting him. I was with him for 3 years. We decided to give it another shot a week ago, he promised to change and to prove to me that he can. I know I had to change a few things as well and I have been trying really hard. Well he's being weird. He had to go out of town for work and he was text messaging me this morning about how much he loved me and missed me, really sweet texts. He promised to call me tonight because he was suppose to come home tonight but he might have had to stay until early next week. We were suppose to spend all day saturday and sunday together. Well he didn;t call me all night so I tried calling him around 8pm, he pressed ignore on his phone, so I tried again and same response. I texted him asking him why he was ignoring me... no answer. So I left it and called back an hour later, he had turned his phone off... I just don't know what to think! He says he loves me so much but he does this? It doesn't make sense to me. If he was really trying would he be pulling this crap, especially because he's suppose to be my boyfriend! If any guys are reading this would you do that to your girlfriend? Ignore her like that? Am just over reacting? I just don't know what to think! I don't know if I'm just being emotional or if what he is doing is actually sketchy. Especially because we JUST got back together and he's suppose to be trying to prove to me he can change and now he's doing this. Anyone's opinion would be great!

**smackie9** · 24-09-11, 12:22 PM

Well explain why you had a hard time trusting him.

**Jasmine1987** · 24-09-11, 12:47 PM

Well.... he would do sketchy things when we were together. For instance he deleted me off his facebook for no reason what-so-ever, we weren't fighting or anything. Just one day he deleted me, he said it was because he deleted everyone but why wouldn't he just delete his facebook then? He did that on multiple occasions then add me back eventually. Or he would delete all his text messages in his phone. I would never delete any of mine unless my inbox was full. But his inbox would always be empty. He was jealous, he would think I was doing things behind his back when I never was! And it made me think he was so jealous because he was guilty of these things himself.... And I think he cheated on me when we were together. I may as well be honest on this. About 2 yrs into our relationship I caught an STD....... Hmmmmm I wonder how that could have happened. He completely denied cheating but how could I have gotten it then? I don't think you can catch what I had from toilet seats or anythng. I still love him and I know i'm being stupid. I just thought he would change, him crying and telling me how much I mean to him, that I'm all he has. I really believed he would change and then he does this tonight........ I think i just need someone to be brutally honest with me lol.

**EvanTelles** · 24-09-11, 01:10 PM

To be honest, I dont know the guy well or you of course...Obvious enough...But If he promised to call and you said he was sending sweet txt msgs etc...But he never called nor did he reply.......You did mention he was financially unstable...maybe his phone got shut off, or hes thinking about the break up that happened after 3 years being with you, and he maybe needs more time to think about things.....To me you are reacting a little too much, but thats normal to think that, because he hasnt messaged you or called you. Only time will tell. Then again, i'm sure you dont want to wait forever so, give it another week or 2 max.. If nothing is said, you'll find another guy out there in the world. Im 100% sure.

**Jasmine1987** · 24-09-11, 01:23 PM

No I know for a fact he didn't get his phone cut off because I just bought him minutes for the month the other day. I don't know, maybe I am over reacting, I just know that he is going to call me tomorrow with some excuse as to why he didn't call. I just don't understand why he would press ignore on his phone, that is the part I don't understand. If his phone was off the whole time then I would think maybe it died, but he ignored me first. And this isn't the first time he has done this. Not to long ago I called him, he ignored me then he called me back whispering in a bathroom...... I just don't know what to think, I just love him so much but I am so sick and tired of being hurt.... I just want to trust him and think the best of him but I don't know if I should. I believe everything he says, I'm just so gullible because I want to believe him, but I know for a fact that he has lied to me. I don't kow if people can change, I want to believe it but is that just me being gullible?

**smackie9** · 24-09-11, 01:35 PM

OMG are kidding me? Get you head out of your Harlequin Romance believing ass so you can smell the stink of bull shit coming ff this guy, Your unconditional love means d ick to him. It will not make him "change". Your love is his ticket to manipulate you, well because you keep looking the other way and he gets away with it. "Oh but he says he love me" Those are lies, lies lies. Reality check:YOU CANT FIX HIM. He is a cheating f uckin asshole. Now please get some self worth and eliminate this guy from your life.

**Simple Love** · 24-09-11, 01:37 PM

If he truly loves you he wouldn't be ignoring your phone calls...Trust is the most important part of any relationship...If you don't have trust you don't have anything...You should talk to him and tell you exactly how you feel and if things don't change then you have to make some decisions...

**confusius** · 24-09-11, 02:07 PM

Although that's a bit sketchy, don't make conclusions this fast. That's all I have to say.

**confusius** · 24-09-11, 02:08 PM

Originally Posted by smackie9

OMG are kidding me? Get you head out of your Harlequin Romance believing ass so you can smell the stink of bull shit coming ff this guy, Your unconditional love means d ick to him. It will not make him "change". Your love is his ticket to manipulate you, well because you keep looking the other way and he gets away with it. "Oh but he says he love me" Those are lies, lies lies. Reality check:YOU CANT FIX HIM. He is a cheating f uckin asshole. Now please get some self worth and eliminate this guy from your life.

Although that's a bit sketchy, don't make conclusions this fast. That's all I have to say.

**smackie9** · 24-09-11, 10:39 PM

Originally Posted by confusius

Although that's a bit sketchy, don't make conclusions this fast. That's all I have to say.

Holy crap did you not read through ALL her posts? Getting the STD is what set my opinion of this in stone. The guy is a serial cheater, and she is being gullible.

**smackie9** · 24-09-11, 10:55 PM

They always leave out the most incriminating information in the first post. They do it because they don't want to hear they need to end it, even tho they know that is what they should be doing. It's that last ditch effort, to seeking out enablers to pacify them.........it's just all a bad dream, they will wake up and everything will be OK (roll eyes).

**Jasmine1987** · 24-09-11, 11:49 PM

LOL honestly I posted this on here because I wanted to hear the truth. Well I think I needed to hear the truth from on outsider, everyone I talk to knows to much about both of us to give good advice. I needed to hear that he's an ass, that if he loved me he wouldn't be doing this to me. I wish I could wake up and everything would be ok, that would be awesome! If only life worked like that! I think you're right smackie, he is manipulating me. I've never thought about it that way but I let him get away with everything! And when we were together in the first place if he did something wrong he would turn everythng around and in the end I would be in the wrong for being mad.... everythng was always my fault. I wonder what he's going to tell me when he calls me today. I just keep thinking he was with another girl and thats why he was ignoring me and turned his phone off. That might be a little dramatic but I can't help but have the thought run through my mind.

**Jasmine1987** · 25-09-11, 01:43 AM

OK so he phoned and apparently he had a few drinks and didn't realize he pushed ignore, then his phone died.......

**smackie9** · 25-09-11, 05:17 AM

Originally Posted by Jasmine1987

OK so he phoned and apparently he had a few drinks and didn't realize he pushed ignore, then his phone died.......

Oh right......there is always an excuse. Like most people that are in love, they do check their phone to make sure they didn't miss your call or follow up on that phone call they had promised. Something much more important came up for sure.

**smackie9** · 25-09-11, 05:20 AM

Nothing dramatic there........just typical bull s hit once again.

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