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Thread: Please help..... *Should my long term boyfriend of 2 years pay for me?*

  1. #226
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    Quote Originally Posted by asdfg789 View Post
    Well, in Chinese marriages, the brides' families get betrothal gifts. That should be more up your alley.
    But i think the dowry idea works better for your mom !
    Ya and the groom's parents pay for the wedding......interesting traditions.

  2. #227
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    Originally Posted by Jazzersize
    I've never understood the obsession with post-death.

    When I die you can tie strings around my wrists and feet and dance me around like a marionette if it gets your rocks off. I really don't care if my dying matters to a single living person. In fact, I wouldn't care if this whole planet went up in flames the moment after my last breath and you all joined me. The universe may as well not even exist after I die for all I care.
    So, I wonder: Is this how someone thinks who has never had the pleasure of being loved and nutured as a child? Would your mother/father care if you died whether with or without your boots on?

    Anyhoo: There are some cultures where the woman works, comes home and gives her paycheque to her husband and he does all the purchasing and doling out of the money as if it was never hers. Now that's hard to understand from where I'm sitting...
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

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    Quote Originally Posted by surfhb View Post
    AGAIN! its a general statement...Jeesh!
    So yes it's a general statement, BUT these days you can't base that assumption with every woman you meet. Women now have so many choices in this modern age, for sure it can be confusing to any traditional man. What's next? men giving birth?! LOL. That will be the end of our species for sure!

  4. #229
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nicole90 View Post
    I know that this is a HIGHLY common and probably frequent concern/topic. I have been dating my boyfriend for almost two years now. All of my relationships before him, the men were always very generous and would take me out to dinners, lunches, movies, and pay. I would always offer to step in and take the bill now and then because I didn't want to seem greedy or feel like I was taking advantage of the situation and they would accept, but only here and there. The guy I'm with now, has thrown many complaints saying that it should never be expected for a guy to pay. Sure, in the first couple of months it's appropriate, but he feels that once a relationship has had it's go for a while, that the "burden" shouldn't always be on the guy. (SIGH) He had one serious relationship before me of 4 years, and supposedly money wasn't an issue with them. So we came up with a happy medium of trading off treating eachother and every now and then if one of us were feeling more generous, then we would take over for that place in time. I ended up trying to see an understanding and I've been going with it for a while. I still live at home, and he is on his own. So yes, he has higher bills than me, but he works full time and I do not. He gets benefits, paid holidays even, and not to mention, my mom found him this job.... I am also going to school and he is not. So... since he makes more than me.... (don't know exact numbers... but I know that he seems to be able to spend $1,600 in bills monthly comfortably....) should this be a red flag that he is just stingy? He says he wants to save money for a down payment on a house...etc (right now he is renting) but my parents are the ones who have brought all of this two my attention atleast twice, and it's very aggravating. Personally, I will tell you I make about $830 a month, (going a little low) and my monthly bills are about $300, so I do have extra left over, but I'm trying to build my savings up also, and he has a considerable amount more than I do. I'm just confused, because my parents input has screwed up my mind, and when I tell my boyfriend about this, he gets defensive and they are both completely different people. My parents feel like the guy should be paying for mostly everything, and I don't even come from wealth!!!! My boyfriend was NOT raised with a mother at ALL and just a dad who didn't seem to do much in the way of teaching the roles of a gentleman. Please help me......
    Yes, you're being unreasonable.

    This is not the 19th century.

    If you want to bend over, or spread your legs, whenever he demands it, then yeah, sure, he can pay every time. That's called being a hooker.

    Otherwise, grow up and stop acting like he's a Ken doll.

    wlboy

  5. #230
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    Quote Originally Posted by smackie9 View Post
    Most not all women....I rather be the provider and well I never bothered to have kids....why the F uck would I want to stay home with a bunch of winy drippy nose kids ew! lol. I'll take work any day, I like my money.
    In this grim financial climate I know LOADS of men who are sick of their jobs and would GLADLY swap places with their wives and stay at home to look after the kids.

  6. #231
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wakeup View Post
    So, I wonder: Is this how someone thinks who has never had the pleasure of being loved and nutured as a child? Would your mother/father care if you died whether with or without your boots on?

    Anyhoo: There are some cultures where the woman works, comes home and gives her paycheque to her husband and he does all the purchasing and doling out of the money as if it was never hers. Now that's hard to understand from where I'm sitting...
    My parents want very much for me to outlive them and die in some hospital bed. My mom tells me something to that effect every time I see her. I don't particularly care. Women have expressed similar sentiments. I take that as a sign that I need to get away from them as quickly as I possibly can. Usually by severing all contact.
    Last edited by Jazzersize; 20-10-11 at 05:58 AM.

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    I think you've well established your need to look like an asshole Grib. You're long past boring now. Got anything interesting to post?
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