Please help..... *Should my long term boyfriend of 2 years pay for me?*

[smackie9]

Eh, $100,000 where I live wouldn't go all that far. I think your issue is that you don't have the capacity to appreciate anything other than cold, hard cash and sex, and that's okay. There are women out there who have similar values.

And smackie? You are wrong. Men and women who make good incomes tend to place less importance on keeping things exactly even. Money (and monetary equality) is most important to people who don't have any.

100,000 where I live doesn't go far lol.

[vashti]

100,000 where I live doesn't go far lol.

Not sure what point you are trying to make here... maybe I need more coffee? In any case, you neglected to address the portion of my post that was directed to you.

[smackie9]

Didn't feel like I had too.

[the_last_jedi]

Generally speaking, I don't understand why a guy should pay everything for a girl nowadays. OK, if the guy is working and making money and the girl no, it is quite logical; but if the situation were the opposite, it would be equally logical that the girl would pay for the guy, in my view.

That idea of a 'gentleman' is completely old-fashioned, in my view.

Regards this specific case......... he is making more money than you, but he has also more spendings, so it is a bit difficult to know which the most fair option is. Perhaps a solution in between would be that you paid a night and he paid the next one, but if you have less money, you might invite him to cheaper restaurants, etc.

[Jazzersize]

About 95% of people in business, finance, banking, investing etc who earn over $100k don't deserve even a fraction of it. All they do is skim money.

Even without skimming they don't deserve it. Investing is the easiest way in the world to make money. The only problem is you need a fat stack of expendable money to invest.

[MaidenMinx]

Haven't read the whole thread because I am too busy laughing at whatever douche called wake up a limp dicked prick. How is that limp dick of yours wake up? And where do you hide it? Next to your cervix? LMAO!!!

Now to read the rest of the thread, beyond half way through page one...

[IndiReloaded]

Yea, but you ALSO said he should pay for DINNER for both of you, which is EASILY another $50. So your talking about minimum $ 100 for a date with you (let's say $20 gas to take you around, $35 lunch, $15 coffee, $65 dinner. At Least thats the prices I'd expect to pay. Hey, I have no problems paying for the first few dates. I just think it's a bit rich to expect a guy to pay EVERYTIME he takes you out, and as I said (from experience) a girl who expects you to pay EVERYTIME you go out SOON ADDS UP over the course of the month. Why wouldn't it? It's common sense. If I'm paying over $100 everytime I see a chick, I go out with her even twice a week, that's $1000+ easily a month - probably a LOT more, and that's before I want to see her 3, 4 days a week. Why should I be spending all that when were on the same wage, and she doesn't even stick her hand in her pocket once? Quite honestly most guys would eventually dump a girl who thinks like that. I know I have in the past.

Oh, I see your problem. You think this is ONE day/outing. Actually, I envision the coffee, lunch, hike, dinner as being separate dates. That means we are at 4 dates by the time he is paying for dinner. I realize you don't know me, but in my case, only a fraction of my dates ever made it to #3. This is going back a long time, mind, but I don't see that times have changed all that much.

FWIW, I have gone out with male friends for lunch or outings (its the closest I can presently relate to a date). They ALL offer to pay my way. Perhaps its just the kind of men they are, very gentlemanly. FWIW, I do reciprocate (or in one case I paid for dinner since he paid for our outing). But it actually makes them uncomfortable. So, what does a lady do in such a situation? Insist to pay my portion and embarrass everyone, spoiling the lunch/outing?

My solution is to let them pay, and then I reciprocate w/something I know they value (usually a bottle of something) when we next visit. I have found that I have to be sneaky paying for lunch (i.e. paying ahead of time) and that is embarrassing to the men, as I said.

In the end, its only money and I think you are far too hung up on it. Your concern about it would be a large red flag for me, as I said. If we were dating, I'd pay my share and then you'd never hear from me again. Something to think about, considering the kind of person you see to attract.

[IndiReloaded]

100,000 where I live doesn't go far lol.

Well, you live in Surrey. In California, the housing prices around Vash's area are like buying a house around UBC, if that helps. Even 2 profs both making 100K+ have trouble buying a house in that area.

@ Vash, Surrey is not one of the nicer areas of Vancouver. Think East LA (with slightly less crime, but getting there).

[IndiReloaded]

Yea, but you ALSO said he should pay for DINNER for both of you, which is EASILY another $50. So your talking about minimum $ 100 for a date with you (let's say $20 gas to take you around, $35 lunch, $15 coffee, $65 dinner. At Least thats the prices I'd expect to pay. Hey, I have no problems paying for the first few dates. I just think it's a bit rich to expect a guy to pay EVERYTIME he takes you out, and as I said (from experience) a girl who expects you to pay EVERYTIME you go out SOON ADDS UP over the course of the month. Why wouldn't it? It's common sense. If I'm paying over $100 everytime I see a chick, I go out with her even twice a week, that's $1000+ easily a month - probably a LOT more, and that's before I want to see her 3, 4 days a week. Why should I be spending all that when were on the same wage, and she doesn't even stick her hand in her pocket once? Quite honestly most guys would eventually dump a girl who thinks like that. I know I have in the past.

BTW, you lack serious imagination if you are spending $1000/mo on a woman. LOL. But the only person you have to be pissed at about it is yourself.

I believe you are middle management. The incomes of those types rarely correlate with intellect.

[surfhb]

I'll concur! 100K doesnt mean shit in LA !

[scott green]

I'll concur! 100K doesnt mean shit in LA !

LA isn't the entire world, honey. I'm sure the OP isn't living in luxury in some posh area in LA, and neither is her bf, and that's the point I was getting at. Jesus Christ, when did this thread turn into the dating etiquette of the rich and famous?? Lol.

[scott green]

BTW, you lack serious imagination if you are spending $1000/mo on a woman. .

I hardly spend a penny on my woman, mate. She gets paid in kind, and she's grateful for it.

[vashti]

Well, you live in Surrey. In California, the housing prices around Vash's area are like buying a house around UBC, if that helps. Even 2 profs both making 100K+ have trouble buying a house in that area.

@ Vash, Surrey is not one of the nicer areas of Vancouver. Think East LA (with slightly less crime, but getting there).

Ahh, I see. As I said before, lower income earners are more likely to concern themselves with expenses being split exactly down the middle.

[scott green]

BTW, you lack serious imagination if you are spending $1000/mo on a woman. LOL. But the only person you have to be pissed at about it is yourself.

I believe you are middle management. The incomes of those types rarely correlate with intellect.

Actually I think I said my salary was comparible with middle management, as in I get paid well over $100K, I never said that was what I do. I'm actually in quite an artistic field, in a job I thoroughly enjoy. Go figure! Lol.

[KingZ]

I'm normally able to understand how Vash/Indi reach certain conclusions, but I'm at a bit of a loss, here.

As a male, I don't want to pay for a girl unless I already like her; apparently, I'm supposed to pay to find out whether or not I like her. This is problematic.

I have nothing against paying at all, I just find it a bit degrading to women (and relationships in general) that I'm essentially paying a small amount of money for the increase in probability that I'll sleep with her. Even if it's $2 for a coffee somewhere, don't you find that bothersome?

I think this traditional method of connecting is a bit disgusting. Money always seems to destroy whatever it touches.