(s)ex buddy

[jellybean3]

I've never been this puzzled by a man and I'm not sure what to do with the situation. I'm too ashamed to talk to my friends about this, so I brought it here. Three years ago I started an online relationship with a man that lives far away from me. We met up once (after 4 months of dating) and hit it off (or so I thought). Things were great and we were planning to get married, when after 6 months of our relationship he suddenly became very distant to the point where we didn't video or voice chat anymore, he stopped sending me emails and calling me and pretty much treated me like a burden. That went on for 6 months until I eventually broke it off. I was also quite immature during that period, freaking out about his behavior, rubbing all the other guys that liked me in his face and such.

But anyway, two years after the breakup, we still talk every day. We video chat. We stare at each other and smile for hours. We get intimate. We share all our secrets and problems, we come to each other whenever either of us needs comfort. And he keeps pointing out how great this is, doing this and not wondering where it's going, being just friends, but such close friends. He keeps raving about our (online) sex life and what a great match we are. He says I'm his best friend and the person he trusts the most and tells me he hates thinking about the future where I'll settle down with someone that's not him, but at the same time tells me he wants me to be happy and that I deserve someone great.

We're both 30 and I think by this age there shouldn't be any commitment issues. I pretend I agree with him, but honestly I would like nothing more than for us to get back together. I don't want to humiliate myself and suggest it only to be rejected. I know if someone came up to me with this problem, I'd tell them to run away from him and find a healthy relationship, but two years after the breakup I still love him as much as I did when we were together.

What is he thinking and what do I do?

[asdfg789]

maybe he's having a real-life relationship with someone else all this while ?

[jellybean3]

It has crossed my mind, but judging by all the time he spends online, I don't think it's possible. We talk for a few hours every day and we're also intimate pretty much every day.

[smackie9]

His wife, GF works the night shift, and the kids are already in bed.

[Wakeup]

Why oh why oh why are you wasting your life masturbating to some dude who will never be more than your cam buddy? You know if you let this guy go, stopped talking to him all together and rehabilitated yourself from the addiction of wanking with him then you'd be able to focus on a real life mate that you could touch and kiss and hug and spend days and nights together and do things with. You are addicted to this as if he was a cigarette. You can't quit smoking if you keep having a drag.

You're silly. As the Asdfg and smackie have already touched on, this man is either married or otherwise involved and you are his extra-carricular past time. Don't be a fool any longer. Do a fade on him or tell him outright you're finished, heal from your emotional connection being severed and then get busy looking for a man in your area. You're 30 so move onto something a little more solid than a whank partner who lives 1000's(?) of miles away for goodness sakes.