Is there even a chance this could work?

[thatonekid]

So I'm 16 and in highschool. There's this girl that I know is into me. I've heard it from many people and apparently shes been a little disappointed because I haven't even really tried to make a move or get to know her. The thing is, it might sound a little cocky but I'm definitely not bad looking and this quiet and calm persona I got going gets quite a few girls going for me for some reason. I mean I talk with confidence but you could say I'm a man of few words. It ain't an act tho, I'm actually shy as hell. I also just happen to be ok at hiding it.

The thing is, this girl and her friends definitely aint shy. They aren't afraid to speak their mind so in that way were pretty damn different. Problem is; and this happens with a lot of girls I meet, is that she doesn't think I'm shy at all. She just thinks I don't care about her one bit. So my question is, if i finally grow some balls and try to get to know her; is there even a possibility it could work out because were such different people? I mean I wanna get close to this girl but I also don't wanna make myself look like an idiot.

[im_in_love]

There's no set formula for personalities and what works together. Get to know her, and you'll know if you'll work out or not. If you end up not liking eachother, then obviously you won't work out.

How would you make yourself look like an idiot if you know she's interested? Relationships fail all the time. There's no way to tell if it will or not without trying

[thatonekid]

thanks. I know it sounds a little irrational, I'm overthinking it quite a bit. How do you think I could make an approach. Unfortunately I don't have any classes with her and she added me on facebook more than six months ago. It'd be sorta weird to just talk to her on that now. I've had too many bad experiences I guess. I know girls that think I literally HATE them because I tend to push people away as I'm really quiet. Sorta hard to say I'm just shy lol.

[devonbrown]

Actually, it isn't really that hard - you just walk up to her and say "Hi. I'm XXXXXX. Wanna go talk somewhere?" And then when you are alone with her, just tell her that you are shy and didn't know what to say. If she is more extraverted, she will probably take the reins from there and lead the conversation.

I have found that people who are shy and introverted actually do well with people who are a little more extraverted. It allows them to take a step back in group settings and let the outgoing one field questions, etc. Basically, the outgoing one gets the spotlight, which is where they want to be, and the shy one gets to stand back in the shadows a bit, which is where they want to be. Then in private, those social personalities fall by the wayside.

Good luck.

[thatonekid]

yea thanks. I get what ur sayin dude. just dont wanna give a bad first impression. awkward silences are hell and it seems like girls always what for me to say something.

[MaidenMinx]

Awkward silences suck, but once you get a li'l out of your teens they occur less often. A) as you come out of your teens you are actually less physically awkward and B) you begin to learn how nice a good comfortable silence can be.

So, my first tip, get a bunch of conversation openers under your belt.
If she wears something advertising her taste in music "Hey cool (item). Did you hear (name of bands) new track?" OR "Cool (item). I've never gotten into (name of band) what album would you recommend I start with?"

[GaryUranga]

Hey man, you have 2 options

1) Keep ypu act up and achieve nothing

2) Act and grow, even if it doesnt work you'll be growing.

I got a gf through kind of keeping an act up, problem is when someone gets to know you, keeping an act up is a tremendous amount of effort. Choose NOW to become who you want to be

[thatonekid]

word garyuranga. haha im not normally shy around girls i dont like so not being able to approach this girl makes me feel like such an idiot. time to nut up i guess