My Life Mistake and Life Lesson - WORST ****UP EVER

[King Zarathu]

it's like that seinfeld episode where george is talking about how it takes 3 tries b4 the break up sticks. you have to realize that any way you do it she is going to be hurt. but the fact is she will be less hurt now, than 6 months from now. besides you shouldn't have to be in a situation where you really don't have it in your heart to be. it's not fair to either of you. it will hurt like hell for both of you, but u will both learn from it. and you can find someone more mature that you can be happy with and maybe she will learn to appreciate what she has and not take it for granted. you both have the right to be happy in a relationship. you can't just stay with her for her sake. b/c you know that a month from now this breakup will enter your mind again. as it has been doing now for a long time. maybe from this she will learn to appreciate you and a few years down the line when she's mature enough you can try it again, or not. that's entirely up to you. never make that promise to her though. just know ur not a horrible person to want a sexual relationship with someone. i also know thats not the only reason you were in this relationship. i know you truely love this girl. otherwise you wouldn't care so much about making this easier on her. my advice for you is to make a clean break, which you know. but when you want to start dating again you need to be clear to the next girl that although it is not the most important, that sex is important to you. this way she knows up front what she's getting into. but you have to make sure to try your best to let her know that's not only what ur about. which may not always be easy. i say good luck to you, and let us know how it goes.

you know.. it's amazing. when most people read something online they kinda throw it away in their mind because it was something that they READ, which tends to be discarded and not included into their real life--however, this is exceptional.

i'm SO glad that SOMEBODY here is able to tell me that i'm NOT a horrible person and ****ed up and sick and perverted and all the rest of that bullshit..

i just got off the phone with her and we had a loooooooong talk. an hour and a half was JUST about why she didn't want to go further than letting me feel her over the shirt--which i had pressured her to do before this.

she made me swear not to say anything to anybody, so i won't do that.

i'm glad you were able to realize that i really do love her. the thing is, is that i just got off the the phone with her and..well..i told her we'd stay together just to see if we could fix it.



*****ING GAY ASS PROBLEM DETECTED*
this has created hope for her.

yes, call me a pussy a coward whatever the **** comes to your mind i don't care.. but i could not STAND hearing her cry more. she was in bawling tears for 30 minutes straight and it tore my insides up so bad it made me wanna crap. and then she told me some things (the convo for 1:30 hours) and we were laughing and giggling and then she said "well.. are you still gonna leave?" and all the excitement had drained from her voice--i knew she was gonna start crying again if i said yes, and i could NOT take that anymore just because of how much i care about her feelings. when i said that, i could hear she was so relieved and the energy came back.

...then she had to go sleep and now i'm having phone sex with some chick from san diego as i type this.

[Junket]

...then she had to go sleep and now i'm having phone sex with some chick from san diego as i type this.

HAHAHAHA! Aw man, skater, you kill me man.

[Joe_Watson]

Either you want her or you don't. Only you can answer that question by looking inside yourself. It doesn't get any simpler than that. You said it was a problem that this conversation created hope for her. So this hope is a bad thing because she thinks you're going stay with her when really you're not? Is the hope bad because it's a false hope? Only you can answer these questions. I can't count the number of times you've said you've wanted to break up with her. You've been up and down more times than a roller coaster. Make up your mind THEN DO IT. Sometimes you've gotta make decisions that hurt other people in order to make yourself happy. As Aries said, "You can blame others for your unhappiness in life, but you can only blame yourself for staying there." So until you resolve this once and for all, you have no one to blame but yourself for your sexual disenchantment. Unless you're willing to do something to fix it, don't expect your situation to automatically change because it probably won't. Change requires effort. It sometimes requires us to do things we don't really want to do. When it comes down to it, you have to guage the effects in the long run and see if it's really worth it. That's how you make good decisions and "in the long run" is the key to solving your problem. So in the long run, who will make you more happy? Jordyn or Meghan? Just make a final decision.

[King Zarathu]

heh heh.. i'm such a dirty bastard indeed

[King Zarathu]

So in the long run, who will make you more happy? Jordyn or Meghan? Just make a final decision.

1) Her name is spelled without an H
2) I've been trying to do that for 8 months

Yeah.. I've been dating her for a year and Jordyn came into the picture at month #4 riiiight when i got my first hug from her.

[Junket]

Watch yourself skater, you're gettin' might close to steppin' the border into wussyland.

[King Zarathu]

Nooooooooooo.. that's worse than my teacher sending me to the corner

[Cybog]

Dude! I saw this crusing around your hometown today!

For those of you whom are unable to use proper vocabulary, THIRD means THREE.

P.S. That has to be one of the funniest things I have read on these forums yet. Keep up the humor!

[schueys_girl]

Skater my man, i feel for you! You have shown yourself beyond your years in maturity in the advice you give on these forums...and your jokes...well i wish you lived near me you have me in stitches!!

I think because you are so mature and realise the value of love that you are experienceing these problems so young. Hell, i remember my lad friends when we were all 14, and at the slight argument or even complaint from a girl they were dumped, so i truely believe you have a good heart

So your facing a difficult decision so young, something which i think you shouldnt have to deal with. But thats not the point. In my eyes as much as you care about this girl, at some point you are going to break up anyway. You cannot provide her happiness for her. This is going to put an incredible strain on you, and then the relationship. She is too dependent on you, thinking that only you can make her happy. She needs to realise that she can make herself happy, and become a strong person on her own.

Unfortunatly i think the only way she will do this is for you to break up. She will then learn that she can make herself happy and not have to depend on you. The reason i knwo this? I was a lot like your gf last year. Insecure, depending on my boyfriend to make me happy. Not wanting to do anything but be by his side, he had no space and no life of his own.

Inevitably we broke up. I was crushed. But i had to pick myself up and start again. I did. Eventually. 5 months down the line he sees me out and rings me that night. We start talking, and then start seeing each other as friends with other friends and one amazing, lovely night he confesses he still loves me and has missed me like crazy.

Now i am a stronger person the relationship is so much better. We have our space from each other because i confident to do this, and i do not depend on him to make me happy. He is mearly an extension to my life; someone to share it with.

I truly believe this is what your girl needs. You clearly care a lot for her, and i think if she didnt have the dependent and clingy issues you would not be struggling as much, and waiting for her to be ready for sex and all the rest wouldnt be as hard...

[Chlorine]

LTsk8er2go-----The sooner you break it off, the less pain for her. The way to do it is, meet her face-to-face, look her square in the eye, and say "It's over". No other explanation needed.

Two possible reactions. She will either dissolve into a flood of tears, or she will punch you.

However, the desired result is that you are sending a clear message across to her. Years from now, she will thank you for having not wasted her time any further.

Good Luck.

[King Zarathu]

Skater my man, i feel for you! You have shown yourself beyond your years in maturity in the advice you give on these forums...and your jokes...well i wish you lived near me you have me in stitches!!

I think because you are so mature and realise the value of love that you are experienceing these problems so young. Hell, i remember my lad friends when we were all 14, and at the slight argument or even complaint from a girl they were dumped, so i truely believe you have a good heart

omfg.. wow!! what an ego boost!!! well, i guess i'll just stay with megan because that was better than the blowjob i was trying to get!

[abercromqt20]

yeah but for how long will that keep you happy??? you know this is all going to play itself out again in a few weeks. like it has been for a long time. seriously think about it.

[King Zarathu]

LOL!!!

i was joking. i said that because schuey's words made me so happy i didn't need jordyn because schuey's words were better than a blowjob.

but i decided to keep megan because things changed and i'll write a new thread.

[Junket]

That's an interesting sig. skater.

Can't say I approve, but that's simply cause I like cats.

[abercromqt20]

that pic isn't real. i have seen it with other things superimposed on it. like a water gun and such. but i don't like it either, cuz i love cats