Confused need advicefrom guys or girls

[Decisions2make]

So here is,the deal. I met this guy that worked in the buiding across the street from me. We met about 6 months ago and I would see him every morning and lunch when I would go to the cafe. At first he would come to the cafe and bs with the owner..never eat any thing..i had a feeling he was waitinf to see me. Over time he would wait outside in the parkinglot with his friends for me to come in and then he would come and stand over by me at the registers. Again he never bought any food. He would wait til I was on my way out the door, then he would follow shortly behind. Im pretty positive he was interested in me, but was shy. We talked off and on for a couple months..bSically stuff like the weather or his crazy friend. Then about a month ago one morning he comes over to me and was really flirty , asked me if I knew his name, told me about some personal background, told me I looked nice, etc. by the way several of his friendss had hit on me in the past..i turned them all down. the thing is with this guy...he was not my type at all but I was instantly attracted to him. And he was always smiling at me so I think he liked me. Problem is im married. We didnt talk much but I felt so Attracted to him. was always on my mind.ok so I decided over the weekend I was going to approach him and see if there was indeed something betwen us. I go to the cafe monday morning and find out that he no longer works there. it has only been a week, but I cant get him off my mind..... Everyday I see things related to him all over..things I never seen before...really unusually specific to him things.almost like a sign, lol. Am I crazy? I still go to the cafe everyday..i feel like I really made a mistake not acting on my gut earlier.... My question is, one of his friends..that I never really talked to before, still works there, should I approach him and ask him to give the guy my phone number? Or should I take it as a sign that it was not meant to ne and try to forget about him? I am married..with issues. I just feel like I lost a chance with this guy. By the way he worked with a bunch of macho guys... I dont want his friend to give my number around....do u thunk he will pass around my number? Any suggestions would help a ton

[BackUpOrGetStng]

You're a really stupid bitch. My suggestion is you kill yourself, then divorce your husband.



Bitch.

[Decisions2make]

We are actually in the process...we are seperated. Thanks

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Well, that changes everything. Why didn't you say so? Hang around for a couple weeks, and you'll know why I jumped on you so quick. Anyway, continue with the divorce, and don't bother with killing yourself.

I think you should ask his friend for his contact info. You got nothing to lose at this point.

[smackie9]

Ya never leave out details like that. We don't know you from adam and the printed word is all we have to work with.

[smackie9]

Tip: if you do get in touch with this guy and go out on a date, do not hide the fact that you are going through a divorce. It's only fair to him that you are honest about your present situation.

[Decisions2make]

Ok im assuming u got cheated on... Thats why I havent acted on Nything because I am married/seperated. Been with my husband 16yrs. We met when I was 15. So even though we may not be in loved...i wouldnt want to hurt him. Was waiting so long to see where my marriage was heading...seperated now but dont know if it will end in divorce or get back together. Like 5 of this guys friends had asked me out and I turned them all down. Theres just something Bout him.is it too lTe...dont know if I have the nerve to ask his friend for the info or give my number...im actually really shy

[Decisions2make]

Thanks for post.....first post missing some things so I dont know everything u said. He actuLly knows the situation because when we first met one of his friends asked me ouf and I told,him i was married ( this was in the beginning) I wore a wedding band till recently,seperated. So he knows...i would not keep that secret

[smackie9]

Well why are you wondering where your marriage is going when you already feel you should persue this other guy? If you know your marriage is over and divorce proceedings are in the works then ya date, but if you still have hope to reconcile with your husband, dating this guy will only create more of a mess with your feelings and it would not be fair to the guy, because he is looking for something more solid than just a "friendship".

[Decisions2make]

Thanks for the posts..im just confused. Like I said ive only really ever been with my husband. We started,dating at 15and been together 16 yrs now. I dont even know how the dating thing works....you never really want to give up on your marriage. I dont know ... U are riight that addidng this guy into my life.will not make it easier....i just reLly fee like im losing something if I dont get to talk to this other guy...if that makes sense...nothing makes sense ne moere

[smackie9]

Thanks for the posts..im just confused. Like I said ive only really ever been with my husband. We started,dating at 15and been together 16 yrs now. I dont even know how the dating thing works....you never really want to give up on your marriage. I dont know ... U are riight that addidng this guy into my life.will not make it easier....i just reLly fee like im losing something if I dont get to talk to this other guy...if that makes sense...nothing makes sense ne moere

Marriage isn't the holy grail, it's just a relationship. Sometimes you grow apart because you have become different people, and you know what, there is nothing wrong with wanting change. You only live once, and if it means to give up something to enjoy a different experience then go for it. Life is not worth living unless you take risks....you separated for a reason, you both probably need to experience more in you lives so why deny yourselves. If you don't like it then you can always return to each other if that is what you both want.

[Decisions2make]

Thanks I think u are right. Appreciate the advice!