clingy, co-depent or latching signs from new lady.

[oldskool83]

Met this girl sunday, well lady i should say shes 26, im 28. day after i meet her she blew up my phone at 6am texting good morning. i havent had anyone do this in along time. seen her a few time and shes done it every morning now, with addition of saying hun now. she seems to know what she wants which is cool cuz id prefere no BS. she likes me yes i know that, but she will text me all day long, reply instantly to my texts. i had 100 texts the one day. if i dont reply in 4-5 hours i get more texts.

i havent quite figured her out, shes out of an 11 year relationship which i stratch my head at. good lord! so maybe shes use to the constant interaction? after the 1st date she text me saying hey this is early but i think we click would you wanna go to party with me as my guest on this day. i never turn anything down but shes always asking me thing really wanting to just talk to me, im not use to that. shes chasing me which normaly i do the chasing to an extent. more so she uses "we" all the time, we can do this or we should go here. other day shes goes you need a good home cooked meal. not sure ohw into her i am, but im curious about her because shes very comfortable to be around, gives off caring vibe. last night she texts me im getting me hair done friday after work so ill look completely different for you saturday!!!!!!!!!

anyone think anything might be red flags, i think shes just alone and likes my company, and wants somthing to take care of, which could be a good thing. i do need a good home cooked meal

[vashti]

Some people are in to this type of intense interaction right away, but she makes me want to jump off a tall building. You might want to ask her to slow down a bit until you decide whether or not you like her. Generally speaking, things that start off this hot-and-heavy will self destruct in no time flat.

[PetiteRae]

Do ask her to slow down or else you will go barmy... If she's been in a relationship since she was 14 or 15 she has near zero experience of being single and probably doesn't realise she's smothering you. The hard part is finding a painless way of telling her to cool it...

[oldskool83]

she said see be since few months, so maybe its understandable. i mean yes i like attention dont get me wrong. shes said she likes me because i dont have children and havent been to jail, my town is not a great town inner city, shes moved here and only lived here a month. any good ways i cant tell her with out hurting her feelings or making her run away. i dont want to her run away i sorta like her but i cant say for sure after a week and a few times seeing her. i do see careing aspects in her which is somthing i am looking fore and she has very pretty crystal clean light blue eyes like the some fantasy ocean on a tropical island.

i was thinking of maybe limiting her to 2 times a week right now because there is another woman i went to highshool with who i recent ran into and i am very attracted to her and curious about her as well. i know if i jump in asap it wil crash and burn and im fully aware and not wanting to crash and burn, burned nuff this year.

[smackie9]

Too intense, maybe it will turn into a fatal attraction and you feel suffocated. 100 texts in a day is kinda psycho if you ask me. Don't let her in yer house.

[kbee]

Ha, that's funny, sounds like my current relationship! We've been dating 2.5 months, and I'm still trying to think of a way to get out of it. I mean, he's paid for ski passes, massages for two, a plane ticket to his home town, etc etc that we still have to schedule and use! I feel guilty that I just want to break things off with him. I call him 'high pressure' because he asks and does things in ways that make it very difficult for you to say no. He pressures you into it--nicely. He also asked me to watch (house sit) his dog for 2 weeks over Christmas, which I think is a lot to ask someone you are in a new relationship with (and I said yes, but kicking myself). But, he only texted me 24 times today, not 100... I know, I have my own issues.

Anyway, to your issue: sounds like she's not used to being alone, and she is very excited about you. Seems like she is so used to sharing and being a part of another's life, knowing everything about them, taking care of them and interacting with them constantly, that she doesn't know when to let the other person breathe. She's used to being attached at the hip, and that is how she is behaving--because that is the only way she knows how to behave. Trust me, if she doesn't cool off quickly, it will go one of two ways: it will get worse and you will start trying to shake her off your index finger like a huge, sticky booger that just won't let go, or it will get worse (yes, both ways are bad) and you will just not know how to get rid of her nicely and she will just run you over and over. Let her know you appreciate her attention and gestures, but that you need a slower pace and some space, or it will not work. If she continues to be overzealous, that's a huge red flag--she can't control herself, and more than likely will want to control you, too.

I am currently trying to shake off my booger.

[smackie9]

I don't like boogers either.........

[oldskool83]

Things cooled down, she just wants to talk she said. mainly is because of her job she has access to phone all day being a fulltime nanny. so i can understand that. but each day i get a good morning text so thats pretty cool. i told her to go to bed the one night since she was sick and she listed.

[rafterman]

I don't like boogers either.........

You think boogers are bad, wait 'till you have a klingon

[smackie9]

I see people texting all day at work....drives me nuts.

[bulrush]

IMO, this does not necessarily indicate "clinginess". She is doing her hair for YOU, she wants to talk to YOU, she wants to spend time with YOU, those are good signs. She probably is bored being a nanny, hence all the texts. If this bothers you, ask her to limit herself to 10 per day, or something reasonable. But explain you like you, you just don't have time for all those texts as you are busy. Her ability to compromise on this will show you either a red flag, or green (good) flag.

Some people are just real emotional in the beginning, the "honeymoon period". Give it 1-3 months, or talk to her, and things should settle down.

A clingy person is often whiny and usually makes it all about them.
"Why won't you talk to me?"
"Why won't you buy me things?"
"You don't love me, you only bought me X."
"You're cheating on me with the couch cushion! That plaid b*tch!"

[oldskool83]

she just texts and likes to talk a lot it seems. hasnt ever been whiny. always asks me to do things or if things get in the way re offeres and reschedudles right away.

[bulrush]

I think what is going on here is: she is bored being a nanny, she has lots of time to think of you, so she thinks of you, and she is really into you and wants to communicate with you, so she texts you a lot.

If you have to limit her daily texts, do that, but she still has a need to text you and connect in some way, remember that.

[oldskool83]

she needs a new job, the nanny crap is no good for her from what i can see but its her issue to find other employment not mine. i do see the point, my texts start between 630am everyday and will go on all day long. not that i care about the amount of texts cuz i dont, i am use to haveing my phone next to me due to having a biz and haveing my ex gf needing to get ahold of me thru out the day. i am interested in her but not sure beyond that i just wanna see what shes all about, not jump into anything.

[vashti]

she needs a new job, the nanny crap is no good for her .

Not to mention the kids she is neglecting in order to pester you all day.....