I'm a Widow who Needs Advice Please

[IndiReloaded]

Funny how fate sometimes steps in isn't it.

Yes indeed. Good things happen to good people, Amber.

[Benni]

Amber, that's wonderful!! I'm happy for you! Yay!

[love guru]

i wud say go a bit slowly...

[Amber2011]

i wud say go a bit slowly...

I would say don't worry. I haven't heard from him since. He texted me just after 6pm, I replied and I haven't heard another word. For the past couple of weeks, he's always texted a "goodnight" text. Perhaps he's got cold feet and decided he doesn't want another meeting. Well, I'm of an age where I am not going to chase after a man. I have many interests to keep me occupied plus, I may have a new job after tomorrow (everyone keep your fingers crossed) so, although slightly disappointed, not overly worried about it. These things happen. Although we got on very well, I did have an underlying feeling he wasn't right for me. Never mind. Onwards and upwards!

[Benni]

Awww. That's too bad. I love your attitude -- very optimistic! Good luck with your new job (I'm sure you'll get it!)

[Amber2011]

Dropped him a quick text asking if everything was OK. He replied he'd just been busy. Yeah right! Despite him saying he wanted to see me again, I think he has taken cold feet. Not to worry. It was a very pleasant afternoon which I enjoyed but realistically, there was no spark. My son's friend's mother is a divorcee who is a member of a singles club. She's asked me if I'd like to go one evening so I think I will. It will make a nice change and get me out of the house

[Kaius]

Again, go find a nice man....a really good man.... and have LOTS OF SEX!!!
You deserve to have fun and enjoy life.

[Benni]

Sounds like fun-- go for it!

[IndiReloaded]

You sound like an awesome person Amber. I predict you'll have more male companions than you know what to do with--men adore women with a mature, upbeat attitude.

[Amber2011]

You sound like an awesome person Amber. I predict you'll have more male companions than you know what to do with--men adore women with a mature, upbeat attitude.

Trouble is, I don't go out often, dislike pubs and nightclubs so there's really not a lot of places to meet someone, except through online dating - how I got to know the man I met on Saturday. We'd been writing back and forth for the past 3 months. Even on Saturday, he seemed really keen but something's made him change his mind. He seems to be unable to let go of the past (he has had a lot of tragedy in the past, several close relatives dying one after the other) but to move forward in life you HAVE to let go of the past - otherwise you will never move on with your life. You never forget but you learn to accept it, live with it but move on.

Whatever way, I wish him well but even if he does contact me again, I'm afraid I would turn down another meeting. I don't like people who mess me around or don't know what they want. Lame ducks I can do without!!!

[Benni]

Trouble is, I don't go out often, dislike pubs and nightclubs so there's really not a lot of places to meet someone, except through online dating

Ditto! That's my main problem. Plus the fact that I can't drive at night due to night-blindness so I'm really limited in ways to meet anyone.

[IndiReloaded]

Trouble is, I don't go out often, dislike pubs and nightclubs so there's really not a lot of places to meet someone, except through online dating - how I got to know the man I met on Saturday. We'd been writing back and forth for the past 3 months. Even on Saturday, he seemed really keen but something's made him change his mind. He seems to be unable to let go of the past (he has had a lot of tragedy in the past, several close relatives dying one after the other) but to move forward in life you HAVE to let go of the past - otherwise you will never move on with your life. You never forget but you learn to accept it, live with it but move on.

Whatever way, I wish him well but even if he does contact me again, I'm afraid I would turn down another meeting. I don't like people who mess me around or don't know what they want. Lame ducks I can do without!!!

Hobbies? A course? Lots of activities where you can meet people. Do you have a local club for 'mature companions', you know, the sort one uses to find dates for the symphony, etc.

Not sure if meetup.com is in the UK, but thats another possibility. Also check the local uni; there are loads of activities (not all for the students).