Can't move on from my ex, please help?

[fivefootfour]

My ex girlfriend split up with me a year ago more or less to the day after a 18 month r I know shes got a new boyfriend now.elationship. It was very sudden and reasons she gave was it was her and she needed to sort her life out with job and friends etc. She said there a chance we might get together in the future but I can't help thinking that was to soften the blow. I have had very little contact with her since, this was advice I took from people and she never really contacted me.

I have tried to move on so hard. I started doing stuff I would never have done being in that relationship, I started seeing more of my friends and going out more. I have even tried Internet dating once, things seemed to be going well although she seemed to stop contacting after the third date.

I just can't see what I'm doing wrong, I think I am a good guy and given a chance I would do anything for someone who I liked enough. Although I never seem to meet anyone who's interested in me. Maybe this is down to lack of confidence, but I don't know how to act around girls to get them interested.

Can anyone give me some advice how to move on, meet new girls and be successful in love? Cheers.

[rocky7787]

I know how you feel, right now, I feel not enough to any women, and all I can do is go to the gym look at myself and workout, use all my anger at myself for not feeling good enough and it does help, because i get a good workout and I feel better, it's not me ex that im hurting from, but my best friend, and it hurts feeling maybe I'm just not good looking, or buff enough for her, though she says thats not it, but it's how I feel, so maybe going to a gym will help

[ices]

It is very difficult to move on, but the harder you try the less it will happen. It is easy to say, focus on yourself, this is not the answer for most people. You often blame yourself and therefore look for faults within yourself. Surprise! You will find them and accentuate them.
The only way to get over someone is to accept yourself, the breakup happened, but it took two of you for that to happen. Now you are only one, you can be yourself, not the person your ex expected you to be. Be comfortable with yourself, don't accept the judgement of others and then you will move on. Not to prove anything to anyone, but because it is what you want. (Just don't become judgemental of others.) If you accept them, they will accept you.
....I was married for over 17 years before my breakup. This worked for me, I hope it helps you!

[Miss_winter]

First, you need to accept the reality that it's over and start to focus on your healing process.

I also just got out of a rough break up not long ago. We've been living together for 3,5 years and she dumped me for someone else. It was hard to accept and put my self-esteem to the lowest level. Then I went NC for about two weeks, and try to focus on myself and the willpower to heal. Now, almost two months after, I can say that I feel lot better and already moving on (not completely yet, but I know I'll get there). Good luck to you.

[fivefootfour]

Cheers for that people. It's good to know that I'm not the only one who is going through this but i'm sorry To hear about your situations.

Does anyone have any advice about meeting someone new? As I said its been almost a year now and I've had very little contact with girls. As i said I tried internet dating but think I will steer clear of this from now on. It would be nice to meet someone who appreciates the way I treat them, but I fear all the girls I find aren't after the nice guy.

Cheers again for the advice.

[Kaius]

hey man, don't worry too much. It's all in your head. You are the master of your universe, so you control what you believe.
Women are very insecure overall, so you should not be nervous about if they like you or not. Just be yourself, and if they dig you, great!
Try joining some local social activities, like bowling, or meetups. Internet dating is kinda iffy because people always lie.
I think you might want to let fate take over... Just relax and enjoy being single for a while.