Men, please help me.

[Lolah]

Hi All,

I'm new here and would really appreciate to take advice from all of you.

I had this 4-yr relationship with my ex-boyfriend who happened to have a new found adore a month after we broke up. I really feel dumped that time. I was so shocked and surprised that we'll end up unexpectedly and just like that. His reasons are: we've been fighting constantly, he got fed up on me, he wanted to explore and he wanted to make sure if it's me that he want to share his lifetime with.. and a lot more reasons. I couldn't let go of him that easy so I said that I would only stop if there is someone out there that interests him.

Two months after the break up, he came up and asked me to give him a chance. We talked about the break up and he said that he did just because he really wanted a time-off and space between us. And about the new found adore, he explained to me that he used that girl so I can let go of him. I'm very willing to give another chance but the thing is, if he really wanted me back, he should've insisted break up with that woman. So I answered him back no and he didn't pursue at all. All I wanted from him was effort.

Two months again after that event, I was the one who chased after him despite that he's committed. What triggered me to do that was maybe, we can still have another chance because he wanted me back (although he didn'd pursue) . All along we were okay, he broke up with the woman and started hanging out again. Btw, while he's still in a relationship when we started going out and the woman has no idea at all that we've been seeing each other. I keep on fighting for him. He said that he's not ready for a commitment again and a lot has happened already. Still I said, I'll wait for him. I wanted him back that I'm hurting too much because he still can't cut ties with the other party. He also said that he's still uncertain and he can't choose right away, his heart goes for me but his mind shouts for the that woman. While we were okay, I found out that they're also seeing each other again and that hurt me so bad. Until he told me that he doesn't want to hurt me anymore. After all the things I did, months of fighting for him and all that For the second time around, same reason, same woman, different time, it happened to me again.


I feel so depressed.

[IndiReloaded]

He's not into you. Sorry. A guy who likes you will make time for you, contact you, etc. A guy who really likes you will hustle for your attention. He's moved on and so should you.

[Lolah]

I guess so. I'm on the process of moving on, but its really hard. What do I need to think to lessen the sadness?

[bulrush]

You need to stop all contact with him: do not answer his phone calls, his emails, his texts, letters, etc. And remove all items from your home that he might have given you. As time goes on the pain will fade.

[Lolah]

Thank you soo much! I'm only 21 and I believe that I deserve the best

[LdFilip]

Now you´re talking
...try to do something to not think about it...go out with friends for eg or so...

[Lolah]

As day passes by, realizations come. It may be hard now but just trust the nature of time and everything will be fine. I'm just trying to be strong and positive. I still breakdown but I know, time will come that I'll forget about the feelings that once dragged me down.